Is this discrimination? Something else?

[Insjl]

Or nothing at all and basically I need to leave?

Employed 6 years at a good company. My partner recently left me and DS who is 16 months. Been told he’s in Spain but can’t confirm this as he won’t speak to us.

Anyway, I’m now alone with all drop offs etc to nursery and I am always chasing my tail, utterly exhausted, if he’s ill I have to collect him. He’s often ill at the moment.

Work have been shitty with me. Comments being made about where I am etc. I am genuinely working at every moment I can around managing this mess I’ve been left in.

I get that it’s a job, I’m being paid for it and my home life is irrelevant. But then is it? DS’s dad has left us. I’m a lone parent. Is it fair I’m effectively forced out of employment, a job I loved and worked hard for? I haven’t told management that ex had left as I was embarrassed I was on my own. Should I tell them? Would it make any difference? I really am desperately trying to manage everything. It’s so hard.

You need to tell them why you are struggling. Then you need to come up with a plan to get DC to childcare for you to be able to work.

Well, if you are thinking the job is a dead loss anyway, nothing to lose by telling them. There may be an option to go part time or something?

good luck xx

Tell work what's happened, if they know they may be more supportive. Is there any option of making up any work from home?

Ok I’m boss of a company - TELL THEM! If one of my employees suddenly goes flakey and unreliable, I have no idea what’s going on and I tend to assume that they’ve gone off the job and I’m a low priority.
If they say “I’m struggling with these specific things, would it be possible to make these changes so I can go back to being a reliable employee” I will be pleased that they’re trying to remedy the situation.
We have an employee going through a tough family situation at the moment and we’ve agreed to changed work hours and some unpaid leave to accommodate. But you have to ask!

No it’s not discrimination, but it’s shit. Tell them your situation, they might be flexible. You should also look at different childcare. Could you use a childminder some days, alter your hours etc.

They don’t know so it can’t possibly be discrimination, but there is a limit on what they can accommodate when they pay you to do a job at specific times.

You might be in a better place if you take long term sick with stress until you can sort a more manage routine.

Please tell your company.
You can't just muddle along and not commit to the job that your company is paying you to do.

They need to know.

@Ozgirl75 thanks. I’m so embarrassed about the situation. I think I will have to say something as I am losing my mind a bit trying to pretend everything is fine and yet I’m working on an hour of sleep and rushing back and forth to nursery when he’s well enough to go.

How can it be discrimination if they don't even know what your situation is? Tell them, hopefully they'll be supportive.

Tell them. It's not discrimination - they have no idea what's going on. They are probably wondering what's changed

Why should you be embarrassed? He's the one who's left and run away

Tell them OP! Work out what working pattern might suit you better and consider making a flexible working request.

Sorry OP, its not discrimination. I've been there, you need to tell your employer so they can help you make reasonable adjustments, even if it's short term.

I’m so sorry - how awful for you.

Agree with PPs to speak to your work. They may be able to make accommodations which make life easier for you.

I hope things get better soon.

Don’t be embarrassed, honestly we barely have a single staff member who doesn’t have some issue with their private or medical life and we do our best to accommodate it all.