AIBU ? SD

[Farmersswife]

Myself & DH have two DC 5 nearly 6 and 10 months he has a SD 11. We have her pretty much 50% it’s all ad hoc and it drives me a bit crazy. DH is also pretty useless with money! Won’t spend on holidays or days out.

SD is off on holiday frequently and days out ect we are quite the opposite and are busy running two businesses from home.

DD 5 almost 6 picks up on this more now, I suggested to DH we take our two to Disney land in Paris next year it would be a b’day & Christmas combined present. DD loves Disney & is very girly and I know she would absolutely love to go!

DH says SD has to come I’m absolutely fine with that but he won’t contribute towards the cost!?

this also happened with Lapland that I booked and I lost £800

AIBU to say I will just take our DD and DH can stay at home with the youngest?

also second AIBU I booked Christmas photos for us as a family checked with Ex we could have SD all fine & now they are holiday that week, photos can’t be done another time as she’s fully booked, I’ve paid 50% of it already DH said he won’t go without SD ( I understand this) so I’ve said I will take our two & he’s not happy about that.

he is making out I’m some evil step mother.

Sounds like you need to work out your custody routine and your joint finances, why the hell should you lose money and not make memories, especially if it was originally planned to include SD.
Your husband sounds stingy, I would be taking money from joint funds for anything to do with house or children.

OP you still haven't answered why you pay for all child related expenses which is the most pressing question here.

Unfortunately all the local nurseries have a huge wait list! When he is 2 he can attend the nursery attached to the school. He works self employed but I do all the childcare.

I don’t really know it just sort of started like that and never stopped, I enjoy spoiling the children at Christmas and birthdays and I think it’s because I know he wouldn’t spend that money.

There is about £100 a month left over & I’ve tried to leave it be as our electricity fluctuates quite a lot so use it up usually on that if it’s an expensive month.

But what is he spending his money on? Do you know?

I can't see this relaionship lasting because you are married to Scrooge and he is married to his money

Another case of an idiot tying herself to a shit man and then complaining about it down the line.