So bit of background:
DH's parents had an acrimonious divorce when he was 14. He's NC with his batshit crazy toxic mother. FIL has 'another family of four kids' with second wife (DH's words). DH has numerous times over the years attempted to broach the subject of rejection & the poor contact made by FIL to a teenage DH but FIL shuts the conversation down every time as "what's the point, it's all in the past.' So consequently DH has not a lot of contact with FIL as to be fair, FIL isn't really arsed.
Anyhow, step-MIL tries to get hold of us numerous times a couple of weeks ago. Quite excessively. I'm thinking something bad has happened so DH best phone her back. SIL is getting married. The date is definitely set, just needs a location. It's abroad though. Step-MIL phones again, 'are we going, would we like to share a hotel etc.' The date really doesn't work for DS's GCSE exams but we'll try & appeal to school etc.
Anyhow, SIL phones today. Only DH is invited. There's no room for me or the two kids due to venue limitations. This has happened before. Step-MIL has effectively made a fuss about us going to a family party which we weren't ever actually invited to; when we phoned for details were literally told "but there's no room for you."
AIBU to think that Step-MIL tries her best but the family are actually just dead rude?