when to tell colleague I'm leaving?

[mybrainisfull]

I am leaving my job at the end of the year. Management know, but I haven't told my colleagues yet. The one I work closest with is expecting their first baby literally any day now. I know he is expecting me to pick up some of his work if need be if he has time off. This is fine, as I am the one who can pick up his work the easiest. Lately he has mentioned a new project he wants to start after christmas, with us both working on it.

I don't know whether to tell him now, or wait until after baby is born and things have settled down a bit.

Is there work etiquette to follow here?

@mybrainisfull

There is no work etiquette (unless you've got a very unusual contract)! Personally I would tell him sooner rather than later. If he is talking about a joint project in the new year, he's going to feel silly, embarrassed and possibly pissed off that you let him carry on whilst knowing full well you were leaving. Telling him now will also give him the chance to speak to management and maybe put other help in place for when he's off. At the moment he thinks he has a sort of safety net in you. He really needs to know that isn't the case.

If you tell him you need to expect him to tell others.

Id wait until he is back from paternity.

the cover issue is not a problem, we all have different skills, and it makes sense for me to scoop up some of his work rather than get someone new in.
I just can't decide when to tell him.

I would just tell him now, to give him time to get used to the idea.

If your employer has no policy I would assess if he is trustworthy enough to not spread it around the organisation and tell him asap.
As @ginasevern pointed out if he is banking on your backup he needs to reorganise his work to take account of you not being around.

Also assuming your role is being filled the company may expect that he acts as a backup to your replacement as they get up to speed on in the new role.
You many never cross paths again or he may be helpful if you cross paths in your future career but its alwas best to leave a job and work mates on good terms

Surely your manager should be telling the team?

management style is rather….thoughtless.
I doubt very much if I will be replaced.

Colleague is going to be really pissed off I'm leaving and unlikely to be replaced, but I'm trying to work out when to tell him. I don't want to tell him bad news just before he becomes a dad.

Are management asking you to keep it secret? Are they likely to spill the beans accidentally fairly soon?

I would tell all of your team and not have it as a secret any more. Fine to tell him before he becomes a dad.

No, not told to keep it a secret, management just don't care.

ok, i'll send a message round to the team.

Thanks all.