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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To find watching programmes like this difficult

49 replies

Ffs555 · 15/10/2023 20:17

The Reckoning, the Jimmy Saville story played by Steve Coogan. No disrespect at all to Steve Coogan, he's a fantastic actor.
I just find things like this really hard to watch. I also found the recent story of the zoophile who abused and tortured hundreds of dogs (Adam something) incredibly sickening.
It fills me with anxiety to think that people like this actually exist who want to abuse others, especially children, animals and the deceased.
It just scares me that these people walk among us and it makes me wonder if they were born this way, could it happen to someone we know, could it happen to us?
I don't know how to stop finding these shows/news articles so disturbing. I had to turn the Saville documentary off. Not sure if it's an overreaction?

OP posts:

Mumsgirls · 15/10/2023 21:13

I remember as a teenager, me and friends hated it when Saville was on TOTPS
We wanted the younger cool dj types not an older man pretending to be odd to make himself so called funny. Not attractive at all, but people hung around him for the access to pop stars. Amazes me that Thatcher and royalty were so stupid to be taken in by him. He was a very obvious creep

JMSA · 15/10/2023 21:16

I can watch most of them easily enough BUT animal abuse is a definite no-no for me. It would haunt me for months, if not longer. Anything like that, I have to avoid.

That sounds really bad, like I consider it worse than child abuse. That's not the case at all, but I still can't watch it.

DuplicateUserName · 15/10/2023 21:21

Why do you put yourself through trying to watch them?

They're not compulsory viewing!

bonzaitree · 15/10/2023 21:32

I watched first episode because Steve coogan was in it and I adore him. But yes really sickening to watch.

bonzaitree · 15/10/2023 21:36

When I’m having a bad mental health day (or year haha) Disney movies are my fave! (No kids haha!)

Blinkityblonk · 15/10/2023 22:07

I found that when my MH was bad through being overloaded after years of upset and grief, I absolutely couldn't cope at all with difficult stuff, in any form, TV, books, and so on. I spent a few months watching only the easiest stuff and reading the Bertie/44 Scotland street books. Now my MH has improved (medication, meditation, time), I can watch more or less what I like. Even then, I never watch 24-hour rolling news or anything that.

Xiaoxiong · 15/10/2023 22:09

DH and I literally said to each other "NOPE" when that saville programme scrolled past the other day when we were looking for something to watch.

Like many others I have a whole list of things I just won't watch for entertainment, horror films being top of the list. Enough horrors in the news and even that I will consume only in print or possibly radio format as I find rolling TV news simultaneously stressful and uninformative.

Other things off the "entertainment" list:
Terrified dogs or children
Serial killers
Point-and-gape reality or docu shows about people in distress or with mental health issues (hoarding, extreme weight, plastic surgery etc)
If the main or only woman in the cast is a) raped or b) a prostitute - bonus points if it doesn't move the plot along and is therefore totally gratuitous

Lilacdressinggown · 15/10/2023 22:13

They weren’t born that way. Sadly they were often abused themselves.

HeadNorth · 15/10/2023 22:18

I would never watch the Saville programme, or the one about animal abuse, or anything about Lucie Letby or any true crime involving children. It would upset and haunt me. I cannot comprehend how anyone can watch that sort of true life horror for entertainment. Can you explain OP? Why did you want to watch it? How did you expect to feel afterwards?

Ramalangadingdong · 15/10/2023 22:23

Ffs555 · 15/10/2023 20:23

I think it scares me what people are capable of. Tbh, I've started walking past men in the street and wondering if they're capable of abusing or harming someone. It's frightening and I don't know how to stop.

I got off the bus the same time as my neighbour the other night - only I didn’t realise it was him. I pretended to be crossing the road just so that he could walk ahead of me and it could keep him in sight. Not a good way to live, is it?.

AllProperTeaIsTheft · 15/10/2023 22:30

I am rubbish with horror films too, it'll be on my mind for weeks afterwards and I'll have to sleep with the light on

I don't understand why you would ever choose to watch these things if they disturb you . I won't be watching the Savile thing and I never watch horror films. I'm not even very easily scared or disturbed by stuff. I just don't enjoy that kind of programme/film so I don't watch them.

DuplicateUserName · 15/10/2023 22:34

AllProperTeaIsTheft · 15/10/2023 22:30

I am rubbish with horror films too, it'll be on my mind for weeks afterwards and I'll have to sleep with the light on

It just seems really silly doesn't it?

Like a severe case of FOMO or something.

Everythinghasgonetoshit · 15/10/2023 22:36

I have found it difficult with the Israel-Gaza war. I have kept a distance from sensationalised stuff, but it has made me very angry and sad even with not getting too immersed in it.

When the media sensationalise something to get emotional responses out of people I get really quite pssed off about it. It feels like it is trying to paralyse people with fear.

I do think some people are just morbid though. They have a weird fascination with terrible things. The only reason I think it might be is that they actively seek upsetting material to desensitise themselves to that incase it happens to them. A bit like diving into cold water rather than wading in slowly.

I really don't understand programmes like Saville etc. Still being on TVs long after he died would have been exactly what he would have wanted, but in exposing the corruption and cover ups it at least might stop it happening again hopefully.

WithIcePlease · 15/10/2023 22:39

Alltheyearround · 15/10/2023 20:47

OP I have chosen not to watch it. I know what Saville did, I really don't need to watch it reenacted, and like you I find these bad things often play on my mind.

Rest assured there are so many good-hearted, kind people (men and women) quietly doing good in the world for no praise at all.

They rarely get shouted about but they are there.

Don't let the minority of bad people overshadow all of the light.

Most people are just normal, they feed the cat, remember to put the bins out, remind their kids to brush their teeth, go to work (many helping others in schools, hospitals etc) and do untold millions of acts of care and kindness day in day out.

There is so much love in this world, but it is often quietly spoken. You just have to listen in carefully to hear it.

I suggest a nature documentary or travel programme maybe with food.

A good old marvel at the wonders of the world always makes me feel more positive.

Totally this ^

I started watching the Sixth commandment with DH. It was a stellar cast etc. 20 mins in DH said 'do you really want to watch a program about an old man being tortured?' No regrets turning it off.

Creepyrosemary · 15/10/2023 22:43

I don't watch stuff like that. I also don't watch the news. I read it, but don't watch it. Reading doesn't trigger me like watching does. Try it out, it might make you a happier person.

Isittimeformynapyet · 15/10/2023 22:47

Lilacdressinggown · 15/10/2023 22:13

They weren’t born that way. Sadly they were often abused themselves.

Who are you talking about?

Not Savile, surely?

Damonalbarnsbigtoe · 15/10/2023 22:52

I absolutely hate it if I even see his face so I know I would have nightmares and be massively disturbed if I watched a programme about him.

lifeturnsonadime · 15/10/2023 22:55

It's not compulsory.

Just don't watch things like this.

My mother loves to watch misery TV and then harps on about risks etc. Drives me insane.

RantyAnty · 15/10/2023 23:16

Set some new boundaries for yourself.
Decide what types of shows you won't watch.
Limit news.

eurotravel · 15/10/2023 23:17

I watched and think it was excellent to raise the question of how he got away with it & the importance of flagging concerns. That does not mean being suspicious of all men.

looking4pup · 15/10/2023 23:18

I think anyone with a heart would find it difficult to watch.

looking4pup · 15/10/2023 23:21

CharlotteStreetW1 · 15/10/2023 20:23

I think we're all finding it uncomfortable viewing. DH wants to watch it or I wouldn't inflict it on myself.

Why do you watch something you don't want to because your husband is?

Ramalangadingdong · 15/10/2023 23:25

@Alltheyearround Thank you for your post. It is lovely to be reminded that there is a lot of good in the world. I have been so down today. It feels as though there is so much selfishness and greed in the world so I really need to hear that most people are kind and good.

Gimlisaxe · 15/10/2023 23:51

Hi OP

I like scary movies but my mental health doesn't, so I compromise and watch creature features and just bad B movies.

Tremors 1-9
Lake Placid 1-5
Anaconda 1-5
Lake Placid Vs Anaconda
Sharknado all of them.
Any film that ends in shark, such as sandshark, Zombieshark, Iceshark

If you want incredible so bad, its barely watchable, a film called Rubber, which is about a murderous tyre.

Dont subject yourself to shit, your mental health cant deal with

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