5 year old DD too scared to poop

[sidsparrownew]

5 year old DD had a sore poop a few months ago and since then has been stopping herself going and when it gets to the point that she really needs to go, she cries and cries and mopes about. I've taken her to the doctor who gave us a mild laxitive, but that doesn't help the psychological part. We try to tell her that her last poop wasn't that sore in the end and although she agrees it doesn't seem to change how scared she is. She gets herself so worked up about it, and all the amount of coaxing and talking doesn't help. I've tried taking her for walks to get things 'moving', which helps the odd time. The main problem is how upset she gets - this can go on for the best part of the day. We're at our wits end. She has also missed school, because when it gets so bad, she refuses to go then she has to rush to the toilet because it's coming out - I'm trying to save her the embarrassment. All the online advice is for younger children - I had no issues with potty training. So I don't know how we've got to here. Is it psychological? Or should I take her back to the doctor and ask for further investigation? She doesn't have any allergies, although I have stopped giving her yoghurt for her eczema. Any advice?

I have a colleague who has a girl the same age with the same problems, she said this website is useful (not just for potty training)

https://eric.org.uk/information/toilet-anxiety/

Good luck!
Xx

Get a proper laxative like movicol so it is really easy to go. Make sure she has her feet on a stool (look up squatty potty on YouTube for hilarious advert on why this matters). Give her a phone game to play if she sits on the loo for 5 minutes each day at the same time, regardless of whether she poos or not.

My dd has this at the same age. It can't be fixed quickly but with time and patience it can be.

@EmptyWineGlass Thank you for the link!! I've read through it and now feel much better prepared and informed so I really appreciate that.

@parietal Thank you for your advice.Time and patience is right enough!!

We had this with DS when he was nearly 4 when he became terrified of going to the toilet after passing a massive poo which got stuck (it was horrific) and it caused an anal fissure as well which got sore.

ERIC was a great source of advice. The NHS story Poo Goes To Pooland may help. We also kept some chocolate buttons and gave a couple when he went along with lots of praise. It took about at least 6 months for him to get over the fear. It’s a catch-22 as stopping herself from going when she needs to will likely end up with constipation issues.