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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think DH is over reacting?

33 replies

IceAndLemonPlease · 14/10/2023 12:14

Just got home. DH said that when I was out there was a young woman of about 24 pulling the letterbox and then just walked off. It’s stuck just for context and we need to sort that but anyhow, she walked off and DH opened the door and called out “What do you want?’ and he said she looked shifty before replying with “I was trying to post a leaflet but couldn’t get it through the door.” He nodded and went back inside but said she had nothing in her hand and he is now suspicious and wants to call the police. Aibu to say he is over reacting a bit? There were neighbours opposite who were outside gardening so if she was up to no good she would hardly be doing it in plain sight ?

OP posts:
DustyLee123 · 14/10/2023 12:17

If she hasn’t actually done anything I wouldn’t call the police, but I’d mention it on a local Facebook page if you have one.
Do you have any CCTV footage of her ?

SweetFemaleAttitude · 14/10/2023 12:22

Is your husband normally like this? Is he a bit of a conspiracy theorist?

VeridicalVagabond · 14/10/2023 12:24

What does he want to report her for exactly? Letterbox molestation?

She probably had the leaflets in her pocket.

TheShellBeach · 14/10/2023 12:24

What is he going to report?
Someone approached your front door?
That isn't illegal.

margotrose · 14/10/2023 12:26

What exactly is he going to report her to the police for?

ManchesterLu · 14/10/2023 12:42

I don't see any reason to suspect what the woman was saying.. although you do get situations where people poke hooks through letterboxes to try and get your keys, so there's a CHANCE she was scouting your house for this, but I very much doubt it.

bpirockin · 14/10/2023 12:53

I agree that it's worth mentioning on a local site - we have had reports of people looking through letterboxes and windows, going round houses and basically checking them out. When asked why they're there they respond that they are looking for their dog or some random person they were supposed to meet there, but guess they've got the address wrong.

OhmygodDont · 14/10/2023 12:58

I mean she could easily of been trying to find out if the house was empty or unlocked.

Often see posts about people messing around near people’s doors with random made up excuse.

theduchessofspork · 14/10/2023 12:59

DustyLee123 · 14/10/2023 12:17

If she hasn’t actually done anything I wouldn’t call the police, but I’d mention it on a local Facebook page if you have one.
Do you have any CCTV footage of her ?

This would be the only useful thing to do if he thinks it was odd

The police won’t/can’t do anything

Nowherenew · 14/10/2023 13:09

He’s overreacting to want to ring the police and expect them to come out and do anything about it but she was obviously being dodgy and I’d probably log it on the police website.

Nowherenew · 14/10/2023 13:10

DustyLee123 · 14/10/2023 12:17

If she hasn’t actually done anything I wouldn’t call the police, but I’d mention it on a local Facebook page if you have one.
Do you have any CCTV footage of her ?

Good idea.

Regholdsworthswaterbed · 14/10/2023 13:12

Is he usually such a wet wipe? Let him call the police so they can laugh at him.

Nowherenew · 14/10/2023 13:30

Regholdsworthswaterbed · 14/10/2023 13:12

Is he usually such a wet wipe? Let him call the police so they can laugh at him.

I wouldn’t call someone wanting to look out for their neighbours a wet wipe.

Obviously this woman was up to no good and it’s worth making other aware, especially if they are elderly or live alone.

Lilithlogic · 14/10/2023 13:32

If the situation was reversed, how would you like your suspicions to be dismissed so easily?

Lostcotter · 14/10/2023 13:33

Maybe worth mentioning to police in case others have similar reports they can link the incidents.

Or at least make neighbours aware via Facebook or word of mouth .

I do find that odd how she didn’t come back and hand your partner the leaflet when he opened the door . It doesn’t make sense.

Lilithlogic · 14/10/2023 13:34

Regholdsworthswaterbed · 14/10/2023 13:12

Is he usually such a wet wipe? Let him call the police so they can laugh at him.

Gosh, wow, such a shame everyone isn't as tough and trusting as you. We all need tutoring 😂

OhmygodDont · 14/10/2023 13:46

Regholdsworthswaterbed · 14/10/2023 13:12

Is he usually such a wet wipe? Let him call the police so they can laugh at him.

To be fair 101 would probably like a log of a women or man for that matter acting suspiciously at the door of a house claiming she was delivering something she wasn’t and was actually empty handed.

Helps build a history or time line when the often inevitability of a house being broken into happens by said person or their mates.

Regholdsworthswaterbed · 14/10/2023 13:49

Lilithlogic · 14/10/2023 13:34

Gosh, wow, such a shame everyone isn't as tough and trusting as you. We all need tutoring 😂

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I'm neither. Just think it's an overreaction by a grown man to call the police who would do FA anyway.

Janieforever · 14/10/2023 13:52

How very bizzare, what does he want to call the police over, tugging at your broken letter box? And why would you put it on Facebook? 😂

Janieforever · 14/10/2023 13:53

She likely has leaflets in her inner pockets or bag, when I leafleted that’s what I did.

ItsADoggieDogWorld · 14/10/2023 13:54

SweetFemaleAttitude · 14/10/2023 12:22

Is your husband normally like this? Is he a bit of a conspiracy theorist?

WTF has being a conspiracy theorist got to do with anything?

GingerIsBest · 14/10/2023 13:59

Oh my word. this is where all the people posting ridiculous posts on Facebook are, "watch out. a 20 something young women is approaching doors".

She may or may not have been dodgy, but yes, your DH is massively over reacting.

Lilithlogic · 14/10/2023 14:07

Regholdsworthswaterbed · 14/10/2023 13:49

I'm neither. Just think it's an overreaction by a grown man to call the police who would do FA anyway.

Show quote history

I don't think it is an overreaction though, what if others has seem her snooping and contacted the police too. It is not beyond the realms of possibility she and others were planning to burgle empty properties. Even if the police did fa it would be on record

Lilithlogic · 14/10/2023 14:09

Regholdsworthswaterbed · 14/10/2023 13:49

I'm neither. Just think it's an overreaction by a grown man to call the police who would do FA anyway.

Show quote history

And why are you focusing on him being a grown man. Are men not allowed to have and opinion on strangers looking through their letterboxes?

Lilithlogic · 14/10/2023 14:19

GingerIsBest · 14/10/2023 13:59

Oh my word. this is where all the people posting ridiculous posts on Facebook are, "watch out. a 20 something young women is approaching doors".

She may or may not have been dodgy, but yes, your DH is massively over reacting.

Never has a 20 year old woman been nicked for burglary 😈😂