Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Fake designer items

19 replies

Jasmine876 · 13/10/2023 16:29

My best friend keeps offering to give one of my sons, her sons clothing which he has outgrown. She has one child and she buys clothes for him constantly- I genuinely don’t see her child in the same outfits more than maybe once or twice and she tells me every other day that new parcels have arrived for him. Because of this- she constantly has clothes to get rid of. I have a larger family than most and I think she genuinely feels like she is being helpful by offering me her sons preloved items. There are two issues with this:
1- I genuinely have no need for the clothes. My son has plenty (he also has an older brother very close in age so I tend to hand down items to him as well as buying new for him. This results in him having lots and we never find there is much he “needs”).
2- The clothes my friend is getting rid of tend to be fake designer items that I just wouldn’t put on my little one. By this I mean copycats of high end brands like Gucci, Louis Vuitton etc. they are always obvious dupes but my friend is adamant she buys it all from the actual brands and that she feels terrible getting rid of such high value items.
I really don’t want to offend her by saying that it’s obviously not the case. But she won’t take no for an answer- even when I point out my son has more clothes than he actually needs. She went as far as leaving 5 bags of clothes on my doorstep when I was out yesterday. And now I need to get rid of them all.

How do I handle this without causing offence?

OP posts:
Mudflaps · 13/10/2023 16:33

Put them back on her doorstep, tell her to find someone who needs them more than you do.

CesareBorgia · 13/10/2023 16:33

It sounds as though you've already told her very clearly that you don't want them, so I think the only thing you can do is return them to her - put the bags back on her doorstep, and message to say you are returning them as you have no room for them and otherwise you'd have had to put them into recycling.

Original poster
Jasmine876 · 13/10/2023 16:45

Thank you both. I’m so worried it causes a fall out but I don’t want to have to find some way of getting rid of them when I did say to her I didn’t want them in the first place.

OP posts:
CesareBorgia · 13/10/2023 16:48

If you want to avoid a fall out, make it all about (regretfully) not having room for the (lovely) clothes - she can't really argue with that.

Strugglingtodomybest · 13/10/2023 16:55

I'd just drop them off at the nearest charity shop. I wouldn't say anything to her, unless she asked, and if she was upset about it I'd ask her what she expected me to do with them, seeing as I'd already said that I didn't want them?

CesareBorgia · 13/10/2023 18:06

Strugglingtodomybest · 13/10/2023 16:55

I'd just drop them off at the nearest charity shop. I wouldn't say anything to her, unless she asked, and if she was upset about it I'd ask her what she expected me to do with them, seeing as I'd already said that I didn't want them?

But then OP is stuck in a cycle of doing her friend's charity shop runs for her.

Original poster
Jasmine876 · 16/10/2023 00:30

Strugglingtodomybest · 13/10/2023 16:55

I'd just drop them off at the nearest charity shop. I wouldn't say anything to her, unless she asked, and if she was upset about it I'd ask her what she expected me to do with them, seeing as I'd already said that I didn't want them?

I had thoughts about this but I don’t drive and it’s 5 bin bags of clothes. I eventually just put them on a freebie page on Facebook but I’m worried it becomes an ongoing thing. I think if it happens again I’ll need to just be a bit more blunt but I really don’t want to upset anyone.

OP posts:
Treesinmygarden · 16/10/2023 00:34

I think you need to say to her that you have your older son's clothes and you'd prefer that she gave them to someone who really needs them - put the ball back in her court, but in a nice way.

I never can see the point in fake designer!! If I can't afford the real McCoy (and mostly I can't!), then I don't have it!

Mydogmybestfriend · 16/10/2023 01:50

Charity shop some will pick up the clothes

Ktime · 16/10/2023 02:57

What website sells copycats of high end brands like Gucci, Louis Vuitton etc. that are obvious dupes? Confused

LucyLocketLostHerRocket · 16/10/2023 03:01

I'd be more blunt (politely) so that she stops.

Just say "thanks for the offer. Although the clothes are lovely, we have different tastes and they aren't what Imid out * in".

Strugglingtodomybest · 16/10/2023 09:00

Jasmine876 · 16/10/2023 00:30

I had thoughts about this but I don’t drive and it’s 5 bin bags of clothes. I eventually just put them on a freebie page on Facebook but I’m worried it becomes an ongoing thing. I think if it happens again I’ll need to just be a bit more blunt but I really don’t want to upset anyone.

Show quote history

I'd be the same, I don't like confrontation. I think putting them on FB was a good idea.

Winter291 · 16/10/2023 09:05

Dump them back on her doorstep.

Also worth noting that a charity shop won’t be able to accept them and will have to spend their time destroying the items. They’re not allowed to sell or profit from counterfeits.
I used to manage one and had a great time chopping up a pair of fake Manolos once! 😅

Normalsizedsalad · 16/10/2023 09:24

Stop being her rubbish bin. She is doing it not because she wants to help you but because you take care of diaposal. Not saying she is naaty person, just that ahe may think you are simply happy with it

RhymesWithTangerine · 16/10/2023 09:29

There was another thread on here last week about someone being upset clothes they’d given were then on Facebook.

You don’t have to confront her. But you do have to say you have no room for them because DS1 already passes in those clothes. Thank her profusely but say you feel bad you have had to put them on Facebook.

SisterMichaelsHabit · 16/10/2023 09:36

Ktime · 16/10/2023 02:57

What website sells copycats of high end brands like Gucci, Louis Vuitton etc. that are obvious dupes? Confused

There are loads of them coming in from abroad, mainly the ones I've seen are from Turkey and China. I wouldn't want to link them though as they are as dodgy as all hell and there's no point naming them as they disappear and new ones pop up as fast as the real brands can shut them down (aside from the ethical issue that if I link to ones I've seen people might actually buy from them).

Jewelspun · 16/10/2023 09:38

No thank you.

Say it once, say it loud.

If she persists then take round your your food waste and 'insist' on her having it.

QueenBitch666 · 16/10/2023 14:22

Put them back on her doorstep

CoffeeCantata · 16/10/2023 14:25

I find that sort of clothing (branded 'designer') utterly tacky and wouldn't want to be seen in it.

I don't get the attraction, even if it's the real thing.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread