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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To miss a mandatory seminar at university because I’m ill?

16 replies

Illlll · 13/10/2023 07:05

I’m on an NHS degree so attendance is monitored and is quite strict. I’m unwell with a sickness bug and I’m supposed to attend a mandatory seminar this morning, which includes a group presentation.

I feel so guilty about letting my group down, and feel worried about emailing the lecturer in case I get in trouble for missing the seminar. I’m a conscientious student and I have anxiety which is telling me I’ll be kicked off the course for missing something mandatory, and that my lecturer and group members will think I’m flakey and unreliable.

OP posts:
Wheresmyguavagone · 13/10/2023 07:10

Are you still having symptoms? Or could you dose yourself up with Imodium or whatever?

If you feel unwell then youre not being unreasonable to stay at home. Nobody will want you spreading your germs around and it may well be you can do the seminar next time it’s repeated.

MotherofWomen · 13/10/2023 07:13

I’m a lecturer. Completely different field though. Please just email. Please don’t go in sick. Get well soon!

BusMumsHoliday · 13/10/2023 07:20

Also a lecturer in a different field. Don't go in sick! Email and they will reschedule you if it's an assessed presentation. These things happen. Please don't spread a sickness bug round everyone!

TheOccupier · 13/10/2023 07:35

YABU. Do you really think it would be better not to inform the lecturer?!

Email now and ask if you can join/listen on Teams and whether the session will be recorded.

Original poster
Illlll · 13/10/2023 08:19

I’ve emailed in now, but feel so guilty about it as my group members will need to present my part. It’s not a formal assessment thankfully

OP posts:
TheOccupier · 13/10/2023 08:21

You'd feel more guilty if you go in and the others all go down with D&V tomorrow!

Parakeetamol · 13/10/2023 08:22

Email and they probably will be able to set up a Teams link, even if it's you on someone's laptop in the room.

Jellycats4life · 13/10/2023 08:23

Sickness bugs are non-negotiable. Stay at home.

PosterBoy · 13/10/2023 08:26

If it's mandatory on an NHS course then you should know/have access to the attendance policy. If you breach the number of absences, the policy should outline what will happen next.

I wouldn't pay any attention to people telling you they work in a different field and it's fine. Sure, it's fine for performing arts.

Just check your attendance policy and what to do in case of absence. It's too important to self soothe using mumsnet.

Original poster
Illlll · 13/10/2023 08:40

PosterBoy · 13/10/2023 08:26

If it's mandatory on an NHS course then you should know/have access to the attendance policy. If you breach the number of absences, the policy should outline what will happen next.

I wouldn't pay any attention to people telling you they work in a different field and it's fine. Sure, it's fine for performing arts.

Just check your attendance policy and what to do in case of absence. It's too important to self soothe using mumsnet.

I had a look through my programme handbook and there’s nothing mentioned about it, and I can’t find an attendance policy. On our first week we were told to email the lecturer if we are unwell which I’ve done. I’m in my first year and this is only my second seminar

OP posts:
CoffeeWithCheese · 13/10/2023 08:41

If you are ill, you are ill. They lay it on very heavily about how mandatory stuff is and how carefully attendance is monitored on these courses (I did an NHS course the last few years myself) but they're absolutely fine if you're genuinely ill and it's to terrify any potential pisstakers essentially.

CoffeeWithCheese · 13/10/2023 08:47

Illlll · 13/10/2023 08:40

I had a look through my programme handbook and there’s nothing mentioned about it, and I can’t find an attendance policy. On our first week we were told to email the lecturer if we are unwell which I’ve done. I’m in my first year and this is only my second seminar

Show quote history

Aaah if you've just started the course and you're in first year that explains why they're being so strong on the attendance messages - you'll find out that particularly lots of the first year they pitch things really strongly to communicate the acceptable behaviour more for the younger fresh out of school students who don't necessarily know those norms of how to behave in a work type environment. I remember we had to sit through lectures covering the importance of having a plan to get to placements and ringing if you were going to be late... not wearing trainers to placements (god help them if they saw the amount of my profession working full time in the NHS who all LIVE in bloody trainers!)... how to send an email and not sign it off with emojis... and other such gems.

FarEast · 13/10/2023 08:50

Normally, if there weren't an assessment, I'd say email the lecturer & explain.No sane lecturer wants students spreading illness!

But as there's a live assessment - which is like an exam - our advice generally is that if you think you are well enough to go in and present, do it.Apply for mitigation saying you were unwell and how you think that affected your performance, but do the assessment.

Wear a mask if you need to.

Of course, if you're too unwell to get out of bed, email as soon as possible, to your lecturer & your classmates to explain.

A good module will have alternative assessments for this sort of thing. I always specify a written alternative - which is a bit longer & harder to do than turning up to present in person, so that discourages chancers.

But if you have always been honest & straightforward with your tutor, then they should understand.

CharlotteBog · 13/10/2023 08:59

People miss mandatory things due to illness all the time. It's life. You can be upset and frustrated at the timing, but you can't time being ill for when it suits you. Just email in.

Catza · 13/10/2023 09:04

Attendance might be mandatory but obviously it’s a blanket statement and allowances are made for illness. Obviously nobody would be kicked off the course for having an illness/emergency/surgery or similar. Especially if this is a one off occasion. If you regularly skip lectures and seminars due to illness, there would be a question of fitness to practice.

PosterBoy · 13/10/2023 09:46

There will be an official policy.

It should be easy to find but in your case obviously isn't, so that's something to chase with your programme lead once you are feeling better.

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