To be a little sad that my boyfriend never takes pictures of me?

[sunrays02]

I had a conversation with 2 friends. One showed us a picture and said “my boyfriend took this of me” and it was lovely. My other friend joked saying “I wish mine took pictures like that! Mine takes silly pictures of me when I look really ugly, with a towel on my head or something!”

it made me realise that my boyfriend never takes pictures of me. He says he lives in the moment. My friends were shocked and said that it doesn’t seem right, that if he wanted to he would. I also remember on our 3rd date, before we were even together, he took a video of me on the dance mat in the arcades because he thought it was funny. He’d never do that now.

Am I being silly? I’m big on taking pictures too so it does upset me a little.

He would be my perfect partner as I hate having my picture taken!

My dh hardly ever takes pics of me. I never noticed till I looked back on pics of when the kids were small and there are literally hundreds of him being sweet with them and about 5 of me. Luckily I used to love a selfie so took some of my own but now I can’t be arsed. I haven’t said anything as I know it’s not deliberate and I don’t want to make it a thing but if anything happened to me I’m not even sure there would be a trace to show me as part of our family which makes me sad. Aside from dd’s ridiculous Snapchat pics which are far from a true representation of me!

I rarely take photos- even on holiday . It's probably because I hate pics of myself , so don't actively do it with others in case they take pics of me

Mine is the same. He takes a bunch of selfies and location photos and pictures of the kiddo and the dog. I seem to be the only one excluded. This used to bug me but now I think I have better things to worry about. What matters is that he is a loving and caring partner.

No, surely the difference is he's registered blind!

Not really. He does take photos - and goes to s drawing class. He's got no peripheral vision and can't see colour, but he does have some sight.

I think I'd like that. I like having nice memories, and also I like
aesthetically framed and visually pleasing pics, but I get quite sick of being with people for whom everything is social media fodder.

My camera broke about a year ago. I havnt got it fixed because I don’t really take a lot of pictures and my partner does. But if this was as important them as it seems to be to you, they would have written an identical mn post!
do you take pictures of him op?

Am I being silly? I’m big on taking pictures too so it does upset me a little.

Yes, it’s silly. If he was snapping pictures of everyone left, right and centre except you then that would be an issue, but the poor man doesn’t like taking pictures, leave him alone, it’s boring for him.

I can't understand this modern obsession with taking photos. Does anybody even look at them again? I find it horribly intrusive and would never inflict it on anyone else.

I have stopped taking pictures of my wife because every photo I take be being deleted. Not the right angle, light, hair and so on.... so I gave up.

It has never occurred to me to take a random photo of my DH and he's never done it to me either. Sometimes we catch the other in a photo of the kids but that's it.

Me ex didn't take photos. Dated for about 5 months. He ended it out of the blue. Kept in touch a bit. Then as soon as he met someone else he changed his what's app profile pic to a picture of them together. Had to block him. Upset me too much

My DP doesn’t take photos of me. But he doesn’t take photos of other people either. It doesn’t bother me at all because it doesn’t mean anything; he just isn’t a photos person.

I don't really do photos. I'm not someone who ever gets the photo album out, or scrolls through old pictures on my phone etc, it just doesn't really interest me.

As a result I don't take pictures. My camera roll on my phone for the last 3 years or so contains some photos of a whiteboard that I needed info from, a photo of some coconut milk that I whatsapped to my DP to check it was the right one before i bought it, and a couple of pictures of a spot on my arse that I couldn't see any other way.

Because I don't take photos, the camera on my phone wasn't a priority so is atrocious, so even if I did take a photo it'd look crap.

I'm happy to take a photo of DP if she wants one, I'll use her phone because mine is shit. If we're out and about and she takes a photo of me and DD, then I'll offer to get one of her too.

But I'll be taking it because she wants it, not because I'll be looking at it in the future. If you want photos of yourself, ask your partner to take one when you want it.

Or if you're using it as some kind of indicator of how much he loves you, stop. That way madness lies.

I still feel sad that my ex-husband took no photos of me at all on the day of my daughters birth, and the days afterwards. I have no photographic reminder. He took ones of her and her on my chest with my head out of the frame. When I asked him about it afterwards, he said he didn't think I'd want photos of me looking so awful. If it's important to you, raise it. It was important to me and that lack of photos of me and my daughter early on still make me sad.

Stop making your happiness be dependant on the actions of another, especially when you think the other person will telepathically realise this is what will make you happy... If you want more photos, initiate more photo opportunities. If you want something, mention it, bring it up, say its something you'd like and make efforts to make the effort to do that activities. Don't sit there seeting that your boyfriend isn't luke her boyfriend and he doesn't do what her boyfriend does... 😏

My ex never took pictures of me, only a couple where I looked quite ropey. But - he had hundreds of pictures of his ex on his phone and all over his social media. Needless to say, it turned out he never had any feelings for me and I was simply a rebound.

This is a thing in our relationship too. My partner never takes photos of me unless I specifically ask and it does upset me. I don't even have a photo with my baby after he was born and because we were in lockdown nobody else took any either. I think it upsets me just because of the loss of memories. I take so many photos and videos of him playing, smiling, laughing with our son. My son is a toddler now and loves watching them. I'm never in them apart from my voice sometimes behind the camera. I needed a picture for work recently and genuinely can't find one picture of me smiling from the last year. I get why it upsets you. I have asked my partner to take more photos (a few times) but he just doesn't remember.

@Overfrog Same here!! A lot of people say that what's the big deal about partner / DH not taking a photo of us but it's upsetting when I don't have any proper photos of me and my baby! It's either my selfie with my baby in a weird angle or my voice behind videos and etc. I did my best as a mum and I want to keep the nice memory of it but I don't have any decent photos or videos of me and my baby. It's just sad and upsetting.

Why would you want him to take pictures of you?

This!!! Every relationship is different too, something your bf does could be something her bf doesn’t do too. Also something that could make you happy doesn’t mean it makes your friend happy too. Stop comparing boyfriends, it’s not healthy.
I do hope you ask him that it’s something you would like and I hope he makes an effort in the future to take some photos of you, this way it shows that your relationship is healthy and he’s willing to grow for you, also visa versa! Good luck!