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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

A driving one - the mad reversing lady

53 replies

Bearbookagainandagain · 07/10/2023 12:41

We live in a residential area with loads of kids, primary schools etc. In order to go anywhere, we have to walk pass the main A road, which has rows of houses on each side. The houses are separated from the road by the pavement and then an area of grass. There are high hedges separating all the driveway so people driving out to the road are blind.

We have had repeated issues with the "the mad reversing lady", and I'm wondering how many of you will think we are in the wrong.

This morning we were walking on the pavement (yellow arrow), my husband with the baby in the pushchair and me walking just behind with our toddler. She (red rectangle) reversed out of her driveway into my husband and the pushchair. Luckily I saw her moving on time to warn my husband, we were expecting her to stop but no she kept going until I waved my arms shouting.
We got really mad at her because it's not the first time she does that, a few times in the past she reversed at high speed on the pavement just in front of us. She seems to either be expecting pedestrians to stop for her, or she has a quick look in her mirror and if there is no one on the pavement she speeds for the road.

She opened her window and we couldn't hear her, but she was shouting and making signs telling us we were in the wrong. She seemed to say should have thought about her being blind, and so shouldn't have not be walking behind her car (mind you in this situation, we were already there!). We are of course mindful that car might come out of the driveways, but we expect them to go slowly and to stop to let us pass as we have priority on the pavement. AIBU?

A driving one - the mad reversing lady
OP posts:
GimmeGin · 07/10/2023 13:23

I thought it was illegal to reverse out onto a main road?

FrankieStein403 · 07/10/2023 13:23

Highway code 201:
"Do not reverse from a side road into a main road. When using a driveway, reverse in and drive out if you can."

ie If its possible for her to reverse in then if she does hit somone/something reversing out she'll get the book thrown at her - and insurance won't pay out.

35965a · 07/10/2023 13:25

Report the stupid idiot to the police

Original poster
Bearbookagainandagain · 07/10/2023 13:26

DrunkenKoala · 07/10/2023 13:13

If she’s done this a few times and won’t accept that’s she’s in the wrong then as well as reporting I’d also be making sure that as I walked along that stretch of pavement I was recording it on my phone (don’t aim it at her house/driveway) just the pavement straight ahead of you so that you have evidence if you need it - public highway so not illegal to record. I had todo this with a parent at school a few years ago, he was always late picking his kid up and would just drive his car onto the pavement, anyone on that section of pavement had to dive out of his way. Shouting at him didn’t work and it was only when I started filming our walk home he stopped doing it to me and my kids.

That's a good idea actually, I'll try to remember to do that next time.

OP posts:
Original poster
Bearbookagainandagain · 07/10/2023 13:28

HollieHobbie · 07/10/2023 12:57

Does she have a dropped kerb? If not then it's not a drive. It's illegal to drive over a pavement if there's no dropped kerb.

It's not clear in the diagram but she does have a dropped kerb. For some reason most seem to drive in and reverse out on that road, but we've never had issues with her neighbours because they go very slowly.

OP posts:
LakieLady · 07/10/2023 13:32

As she regularly does this, I'd report to the police via the non-emergency number. They might go round and advise her to back in and drive out forwards.

HollieHobbie · 07/10/2023 13:36

Bearbookagainandagain · 07/10/2023 13:28

It's not clear in the diagram but she does have a dropped kerb. For some reason most seem to drive in and reverse out on that road, but we've never had issues with her neighbours because they go very slowly.

Edited
Show quote history

That's a relief but it doesn't give her the right to drive like a lunatic. I shudder to think what could happen if she carries on doing that!

Passepartoute · 07/10/2023 13:38

It's pointless saying she should reverse in, given that there is no law requiring her to do so. What she should do, of course, is be incredibly cautious about reversing out - she should check as far as possible before she starts, and do it at snail's pace so that pedestrians have time to see her and she has time to stop. Ideally she should have a car with a reversing camera.

Mumteedum · 07/10/2023 13:40

She's an idiot but for your family's safety I would be stopping at the edge of her driveway every time, and checking carefully before crossing. You obviously can't do this for every drive, but I would for her.

MikeRafone · 07/10/2023 13:42

If its happening a lot, film her doing this and report to the police - they can have a word with her and tell her she shouldn't be reversing out of her drive but reversing into her drive

itsalongwaybackfromsorry · 07/10/2023 13:47

Report her to the police.

And I agree with the suggestion to film her driving like the idiot she is.

user1477391263 · 07/10/2023 13:49

In the country I am living in, the unwritten rule is that you always reverse park and drive out unless there is a sign saying that you should forward park; it's a good rule!

Nanny0gg · 07/10/2023 13:52

Passepartoute · 07/10/2023 13:38

It's pointless saying she should reverse in, given that there is no law requiring her to do so. What she should do, of course, is be incredibly cautious about reversing out - she should check as far as possible before she starts, and do it at snail's pace so that pedestrians have time to see her and she has time to stop. Ideally she should have a car with a reversing camera.

But is there not a law about reversing out?

So unless she can turn in her drive, she should reverse in

DistractMe · 07/10/2023 13:56

YANBU and she sounds a nightmare. However, we used to live on a 40mph road with continual traffic from 7am to 10pm each day. It was virtually impossible to reverse onto the drive as the driver behind would never leave enough space. So reversing out was unavoidable. And always done with extreme caution.

dammit88 · 07/10/2023 13:58

Is that picture correct? They have to drive over the grass verge to get on the road? Is the yellow definitely a path and not a road?

WillowCraft · 07/10/2023 13:59

FrankieStein403 · 07/10/2023 13:23

Highway code 201:
"Do not reverse from a side road into a main road. When using a driveway, reverse in and drive out if you can."

ie If its possible for her to reverse in then if she does hit somone/something reversing out she'll get the book thrown at her - and insurance won't pay out.

That's not true. Car insurance always has to pay out to an injured third party

pinkstripeycat · 07/10/2023 14:01

Pedestrians always have right of way, even when crossing the road (according to the new Highway Code rules). If a pedestrian is on the path there is no question of whether they have right if way. They do!

Gymmum82 · 07/10/2023 14:04

If her car made contact with your husband you need to report it to the police. We have an old man here who shouldn’t be on the road. He has hit me with his car before as a pedestrian and another man and child walking to school on pavements. Both of us reported and the second time it happened he was arrested and received a fine. I’m hoping there will not be another time

Passepartoute · 07/10/2023 14:04

But is there not a law about reversing out?

No, there isn't. Apart, obviously, from the usual laws about doing so safely.

Passepartoute · 07/10/2023 14:11

FrankieStein403 · 07/10/2023 13:23

Highway code 201:
"Do not reverse from a side road into a main road. When using a driveway, reverse in and drive out if you can."

ie If its possible for her to reverse in then if she does hit somone/something reversing out she'll get the book thrown at her - and insurance won't pay out.

I don't know why people have this weird idea that insurance won't pay out if you drive negligently or in breach of the law. Insurance won't pay out unless you drive negligently - because there won't be any liability otherwise.

No-one would get the book thrown at them on the basis that theoretically a few hours earlier it would be possible to reverse in, not least because it would be virtually impossible to prove. As has been pointed out, sometimes it isn't possible because of the other traffic on the road. They would get the book thrown at them if they had reversed without a LOT of caution, but that's a different issue.

ZenNudist · 07/10/2023 14:11

I reverse carefully onto a busy b road across a pavement. I have reversing cameras with telescopic lense so stop at my gate then can see up left and right onto pavement. If I see a pedestrian then I drive back in to my drive.

I'd go round and talk to her nicely and don't rely on the police to do it. Maybe take around some news stories about children / people being killed in similar circumstances and the fact that she will end up in jail.

Also I'd be keeping hold of my dc and be very careful approaching her drive. Stop and treat it as a road. Its all very well having right of way but it's your family who stand to be hurt and her getting thrown in jail won't console you.

Totalblindnessofthesoul · 07/10/2023 14:20

For various reasons I always drive in and reverse out. But:

  • I physically check the payments before i get in the car (no side roads where they found suddenly emerge from) so I know if they'll be anyone coming along.
  • i have ensured i have visibility both sides, so unless there's someone under 50cm I'd see them already
  • reversing sensors
  • i go very slowly and carefully.

I feel actually safer doing that than driving out. I'd still be sticking my nose out before I could clearly see all of the pavement.

A cat or small dog in the loose (or ridiculously speedy but unaccompanied sprinting 12m old) might be at risk if my sensors failed but I've got equal visibility and bo sensors going forward.

This woman however sounds like a menace.

Anonymouseposter · 07/10/2023 14:28

How do the cars get onto the road? Over the grass? Or is the pavement a sort of driveway. I’m just curious, whatever the arrangement she should be going slowly and taking care.

PikachuChickenRice · 07/10/2023 14:33

She's reckless and irresponsible OP YANBU.

I always reverse out (because a lamppost on the side of the road makes it very difficult to reverse in with the way my car faces when it comes up the road.. and it's too narrow to turn around). Also, as it's a hill if a reverse I can't look down and see if my cat's there, whereas forward I can see the ground.
I do it very slowly, always looking, foot on clutch, stop for any pedestrians etc.

Who the hell speeds out after a quick check? Madness.

AvocadoSurprise · 07/10/2023 14:50

"202
Look carefully before you start reversing. You should

use all your mirrorscheck the ‘blind spot’ behind you (the part of the road you cannot see easily in the mirrors)check there are no pedestrians (particularly children), cyclists, other road users or obstructions in the road behind you.
Reverse slowly whilechecking all aroundlooking mainly through the rear windowbeing aware that the front of your vehicle will swing out as you turn.
Get someone to guide you if you cannot see clearly.

203
You MUST NOT reverse your vehicle further than necessary.
Law CUR reg 106"

Another excerpt from the Highway Code. She should be checking to see if there are people there & if safe to do so reversing SLOWLY. It will be too late when she's injured or killed someone. I would definitely get the police to have a word with her.