To leave a wedding after the ceremony?

9 replies

Scaredycats · 07/10/2023 08:31

I’m pregnant and I have terrible sickness and fatigue, I’ve had quite a bit of time signed off work and just generally have felt rubbish for the last few weeks.

I’m going to a wedding next week, I RSVP’d before I was pregnant so thought I would be fine to attend! I’m getting super worried about how I’m going to cope. The wedding itself has two parts in two locations and the couple have arranged coaches from one to the other and back, meaning I wouldn’t be able to just duck out into a hotel room for a break or to throw up as I would do in a hotel type wedding. Going on a coach also makes me vomit (I use public transport for work) as I’ve started getting awful travel sickness but the reception venue is being kept a bit of a secret!

WIBU to just go to the ceremony and post-ceremony drinks and then leave before the reception? There isn’t a sit down meal either, from what we’ve been told it’s more like a food truck type of set up so that makes me feel less bad about wasting costs.

OP posts:

Slobberchops1 · 07/10/2023 08:33

You need to let them know you will be doing that . You will still be catered for food truck or not

DivingForLove · 07/10/2023 08:33

As long as you let the B&G know as the food truck will still need numbers then of course you can just go for the ceremony!

Sumtimesiamgreen · 07/10/2023 08:42

I’d hate the coach idea. For drinkers it’s fine and probably welcome but I’d feel stranded!
Can you explain your situation to the b &g and ask to follow the coach or get directions on the day. It’s not like you want to spoilt the surprise it’s just you want to be able to leave when you need to.

Rocknrollstar · 07/10/2023 08:44

It’s fine to leave but you need to tell them in advance that that is what you are going to do. DSs witnesses had to leave after the ceremony as they had a family wedding to attend!

Mrsjayy · 07/10/2023 08:45

Just let them know you won't be there they will have paid for your food so I think its just polite to tell them.

Original poster

Scaredycats · 07/10/2023 08:47

When I say the wedding is next week, it’s literally in 3 days - surely it would be too late to change numbers? We had a few drop outs at our wedding and were still charged for them. I had hoped I would be feeling better as I’m almost 12 weeks but I don’t at all.

OP posts:

Sparkleirisheyes · 07/10/2023 08:49

Just say you’re unwell on the day

Beautiful3 · 07/10/2023 09:01

Me personally, I'd message on the day saying I'm unwell. I had terrible sickness for the whole 12 weeks of every pregnancy. I didn't go anywhere, apart from work and home.

Loopytiles · 07/10/2023 09:04

I think YABU to do that, either go and see how you get on, or don’t go.

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