To avoid?

[Faytella2020]

A school mum I've known for a year is draining me. We have a group message and she'll often ask things like what time is this open, where do I pay for this, etc. I get sometimes things are overwhelmed but the others tend to ignore her. She'll then text me and ask me these questions. All the information is freely available on the school app. I've noticed she texts me daily. Sometimes several times. I find it a bit annoying but don't want to be rude to her.
At the end of the day our kids are going to be in the same school for 6 years !

I think the blunt truth here is that you don’t necessarily need to be rude to someone to be direct. It’s all about how you approach what you’re actually saying to this friend. It’s not remotely unreasonable for you to feel drained at the constant pressure of having to reply to her.

Try something new, the next time she texts you with a question reply with “I’m not sure let me check the school app” … leave it a few minutes then reply with a screenshot to the relevant information - follow that with a “I got that off the school app, do you have it? It’s really handy for all information we need as parents” … if that doesn’t hint well enough for her to download the app herself then up the ante. The following time she asks you a question just write “I genuinely don’t know, have you tried looking on the school app? I would look myself but I’m busy at the moment, let me know if you find out” - then the ball is entirely in her court and it’s being direct by saying “find the information out yourself” but without necessarily being rude about it.

Just remember, it’s not your responsibility to organise someone else’s life. It’s theirs.

TheBluntTruth

I do that but she doesn't take the hint or I don't reply for hours !!

Turn your WhatsApp ticks to permanently grey and she doesn't know you have seen it and then ignore ignore ignore

@TheBluntTruth A very thought out, reasoned response on MN! You must be new here.

I seem to always end up with people like this.

I think you are going to have to do what the others are doing and ignore.

I know where you are coming from, because you don't want to come across as rude.

But there is a huge difference between asking for help and taking the piss.
She is taking the piss.

She'll text me say at 5pm and if I haven't responded She'll text again at 8pm. Its intense

Several wrong answers should sort it

Can you just reply with 'sorry I don't know, you'll need to check on the app' and leave it at that? If she messages regarding the same thing again just repeat your first answer

Or yes as pp says wrong answers every time 😂

🤣🤣🤣

Brilliant!

Never thought of this but it's genius!!!

Then if she texts to say you got it wrong you can reply "sorry, but glad you've figured out how to get the correct information."

You could even add "I'll just text you for info in future" 🤗

Wrong answers 😂

I was going to say just ignore/block - but wrong answers is brilliant. Just develop a reputation for muddle-headed unreliablity. After a few weeks of PE day is Friday when really it's Thursday - or trip payment due at the end of the week when it's tomorrow - she'll find herself a more reliable PA.