To worry about how we'd contact DS's school in an emergency

[cottonwoolbrain]

He started in year 7 this year. I've occasionally needed to contact them as he has SEN and a couple of other minor issues.

If I send an email to general address they send an autoreply saying someone will get back within 2 school days (usually they don't and I have to send a chase)

If I phone it always drops to an answer machine and says someone will call me back - they don't even if I wait a couple of days then leave another message. There is only one phone number.

If I email class teacher or head of year they usually do get back within 2-3 school days...

But short of actually physically turning up there seems to be no way to contact them quickly. If for any reason there was a crisis at home or one of us was urgently admitted to hospital there would be no way to get in touch.

DD's school answer emails within a couple of hours and the phone nearly always gets answered on the first try

I'm probably being over anxious and hopefully we'll never need to get in touch in a rush but I'd like to know that I can if necessary.

I cannot fathom people saying but why on earth would you need to contact the school in an emergency and its all due to OP's supposed anxiety. Mumsnet is a completely different bizarre world at times

Totally agree. Someone should always answer the phone, unless the school itself is dealing with an emergency (which would hopefully be a once in a blue moon scenario, like someone having a heart attack).

And secondary school kids don't always have mobile phones, and when they do, they have to be kept switched off in the day.

Even in 2003 secondary school kids had mobile phones.

So what if there's a rule saying they need to be switched off? Most kids will likely have a phone on silent at the bottom of their bags, for reasons exactly like this.

Kids need to learn pragmatism and gain independent thought. Blindly following a soft rule like "phones switched off at all times" helps no one.

I get where the OP is coming from, as she also mentions that her son has SEN.

While my son was in secondary, I had a medical emergency.
My son had a mobile phone that he checked. But due to his SEN (Autism), it was vitally important that he didn't have the information as to what was happening until the correct time, so a text was of no use. And I couldn't phone my son, at the correct time, as I couldn't breathe!
I was admitted to hospital from a GP's appointment. My son got SEN transport home from school (mainstream school).
He needed to be told, not to get on the school transport (taxi), but to go with his Granny, who was waiting outside the school.
It was vital that he wasn't told this before school ended as he would sit, worry, and likely walk out of school. It was also vital that school didn't tell him the problem, as he needed to be told by someone who knew him very well, and be able to give him all the answers he needed, not just be told Mum not well, go with Granny, as he would have had a meltdown.
Also no Transport couldn't take him to Granny house, and no Granny couldn't collect him from transport at our house, as it had to be me who met him off transport.
So in our situation, it was important that the school could be contacted.

I worked in Secondary School office. The emails that get forwarded on to teaching staff just don't get answered because they get so many and are super busy. Anything that is an emergency is dealt with as such. They are all read and dealt with as appropriate with levels of urgency

The OPs kids are secondary. So at home time, they are basically sent away. No one checks who collects them. No one checks if they've been collected. Therefore no one would need to ring home.

What the previous poster was talking about (her husbands death), meant someone would be sent up to the school in the middle of the day to collect the children - in this case, they would be able to call Mum and check in with her, as its not home time. Or, tbh, at secondary, they'd say "Hannah, Jacob, Auntie Sarah has come to collect you as you need to go home" and trust that teenagers would be fine going with Auntie Sarah because, let's face it, at 3.30pm every day they could leave with literally anyone else.

I’m stunned some of you think this is OK.
I wouldn’t send my kids to a school that didn’t have a manned telephone number.

I would just double-check whether the main school number is the correct one for emergency matters. Sometimes it wasn't answered at DD's school, but I think that was just if the receptionist had nipped to the loo or was dealing with a queue at the desk. I would imagine that once they pick up the messages, there are two categories - those that need to be relayed to someone else to respond, and those that need some immediate action. I certainly never had any problem with the school passing on messages such as a doctor's appointment booked after DD had left for school, or that her piano teacher was ill so don't head there after school. I left other messages that did not get any response, but they weren't urgent.

If the phone is at the bottom of their bag on silent, then it's not going to be much use for unexpected messages.

I've worked in schools for 10 years. You have no idea how many kids don't have a single up to date emergency (or otherwise) contact details.

I've been in ambulances with kids, had to call the authorities etc as kids not collected, every bump, bruise, missing PE kit, lost coat and myriad reasons for contacting home, just to be met with 'this number is no longer in use', or just ringing out.

On the other hand, parents ringing to say their child hasn't got their trainers for xyz excuse this week and we need an immediate response?

I've been in the school reception at DDs Secondary school a few times. Once in the 10 mins I was there (picking up DD) they had...

• a child being sent to the medical room.
• a delivery
• a security guard picking up cash
• a parent dropping stuff off
• a pupil returning from an appointment
• a music teacher leaving and needing buzzed out

The phone rang a few times and no the Receptionist didn't answer it everything but checked the messages when it all calmed down.

Just because the messages say they will get back to you in 2-3 days doesn't mean they wouldn't respond if something was time sensitively urgent. It's more setting an expectation that run of the mill queries, of which they will receive hundreds a week, will not be answered within hours.

I suspect if you left a message or sent an email that really really did need dealing with before the end of the school day then they would prioritise your email over one saying Jonny is going to be leaving school early a week on Tuesday for an orthodontist appointment. It's just that the ones you have sent so far were not actually urgent, so didn't elicit an urgent response.

As a couple of posters alluded.

I wouldn't be happy to just leave it and assume that the phone calls and emails were being triage.

Personally I wouldn't be happy with this setup. But I would get in contact with the school to clarify what the process is if you needed to contact them in an emergency.

That sounds rubbish.

I'm a single mum with no support. Our school always answer the phone, so it isn't an issue but they have my mobile number and if I didn't turn up to collect him, I'm sure they'd ring me pretty quickly.

I can't ring ds, they aren't allowed phones on school premises, and anyway he never remembers to charge his phone.

I can also ring transport at our school and the HT's pa in an emergency.

I think it's likely that the messages do get checked in real time but then but triaged, by someone monitoring the inbox and voice mail, so emergency will be responded to immediately and other non urgent ones can be answered at a slower pace.

I would hope that any answer phone message or email that indicates the issue is an emergency would get dealt with quicker than the general time frame they give. It would make sense. But I wouldn't like not being able to talk to someone directly, can understand why you are concerned about that.
I've had to call my DD's school to get them to inform DD that her dentist appointment had been changed, that information needed to get to her within the hour - could not have relied on an answerphone or an email in that situation. Thankfully her teacher gives out his personal number for such situations so I was able to call direct to her teacher to get him to tell her (then had to call again 20 minutes later when her appointment got cancelled....)

I think in that scenario I would be sending a relative on the approved pickup list to the school to break such significant news in person. I wouldn't announce it to the school until I had arranged a suitable location to tell the child. Too much risk of "Stephen Boggs in Mrs Lilly's class - come to the office please, your Dad is dead" over the tannoy.

Taking the time to break the news sensitively is more important than rushing.

For parents worried about life events like the time of a dental appointment being changed: that's obviously of significance to the family, but ultimately schools are not charged with facilitating their pupils' external timetabling, and if that message didn't get passed on on the day, and an appointment was missed, I'd take it up with the dentist.

I should add that I don't mean to critique in any what you did in such a circumstance which would be an unimaginable horror for all; just that if I were to imagine myself there, I don't think I would be telephoning the school or getting annoyed they didn't answer.

Surely in this case, just turning up at school would be fine? when my sister died suddenly, the police contacted her husband at work, and my mum went to the school with a police officer to collect the children.

No, because the vagueness doesn't give a sense of anything other than a bit of entitlement.

Put the specifics in the email and they'll be seen.

Like a pp I'm also stunned that anyone thinks this is acceptable. I put it down to some people on Mumsnet just having to be contrary for the pathetic thrill it gives them.