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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think the amount of school time sessions are ridiculous

15 replies

Pugfin · 04/10/2023 20:16

Before anyone says this isn't teacher bashing- DS' teacher is fantastic as are all of the support staff.

Bloody hell though the amount of last minute day time meetings/sessions- how on earth are people who work supposed to attend? Me and DH have been sharing them out but it's been 2 a week and just had an email this evening saying about a 2 hour 'my family' session this Friday. Neither of us can go and as DS is 4 he won't understand and will probably be upset- but jeez what on earth? It's good parents are engaged and appreciate that it's surely more work for teachers so not for their benefit but it's truly wild. At least with some notice might be able to arrange something, but already used lots of goodwill to make the numerous things.

How does anyone else do it- do you feel guilty if you can't go?

OP posts:
Thelondonone · 04/10/2023 20:38

I’m a teacher so have never done any…

Pieceofpurplesky · 04/10/2023 20:39

Same, teacher. Never been to any and had to listen to the head main about low take up. When he would never let us go to any!

Pieceofpurplesky · 04/10/2023 20:40

Moan

Isthisexpected · 04/10/2023 20:41

There was a recent thread about something similar but more focused on the lack of notice. Lots of teachers posted to say it's all on the online calendar if only you'd look at the start of term.

LooksLikeImStuckHere · 04/10/2023 20:42

Also a teacher and have to not attend the many in school events that happen. I try to make it to ones where my children would notice - assemblies etc. But miss the information giving ones as 9/10 they send out the PowerPoints anyway.

It’s frustrating as a parent, but as a teacher I don’t want to spend my personal time doing these things either, so I totally get it.

TheHennaHairedHarridan · 04/10/2023 20:45

I don't go to most of it. Between us dp and I always make sure we go to sports day and nativity (kids are in different key stages so usually two of each). Anything else is a bonus. You won't be the only working parents who are unable to attend everything.

Original poster
Pugfin · 05/10/2023 07:03

Isthisexpected · 04/10/2023 20:41

There was a recent thread about something similar but more focused on the lack of notice. Lots of teachers posted to say it's all on the online calendar if only you'd look at the start of term.

There isn't one for DS school, someone asked as a settling session and they said things change so much they just email.

It’s frustrating as a parent, but as a teacher I don’t want to spend my personal time doing these things either, so I totally get it.

Oh absolutely wouldn't expect or want any teacher to do them out of school hours- just seems an excessive amount of stuff.

OP posts:
arintingly · 05/10/2023 07:08

Isthisexpected · 04/10/2023 20:41

There was a recent thread about something similar but more focused on the lack of notice. Lots of teachers posted to say it's all on the online calendar if only you'd look at the start of term.

This isn't true at my kids school - there is an online calendar but the stuff goes on at the last minute there too

Or it did - I am a parent governor and complained to the head and it does seem to be changing. Last year, sports day was 2 days notice!

One of us has managed to attend everything so far because we can both WFH and we live 2 mins from the school but lots of parents don't make it to everything and the kids are honestly fine. I try to include other children and get them to sit with us and admire their work etc

lavenderlou · 05/10/2023 07:15

I'm a primary teacher. We don't organise many things for parents to come to but there is an expectation that parents are invited for certain things. We know that many parents can't make it so if it's an information session we send out PowerPoints etc.

I never go to anything at my DC's school - they are used to it by now.

fgsstopbs · 05/10/2023 07:17

I didn't/don't go to everything at my children's schools but I go to the important things etc. You just have to explained to your child that you have to work, don't feel guilty over it.

Hangingintherejust · 05/10/2023 07:22

Like you we will try to make sports day and nativity but rarely go to the other things because of work. Speak to DC and they may be disappointed but will likely tell you X, Y, Zs parents couldn't come because of work so they sat together. As you get to know other parents the ones that can go will probably look out for friends without a parent there. At least that's what we do.

Russooooo · 05/10/2023 07:22

Also a teacher. I’ve never been on a trip, to a sports day, assembly, ‘meet the teacher’ session, etc etc, for my own DC.

It’s always completely baffled me that schools do so much of this, when most staff know exactly how hard it is for the children of working parents 🤷🏻‍♀️

MotherOfCrocodiles · 05/10/2023 07:23

Our nursery does this. It drives me mad.

The things are "optional" obviously but then my kids will be upset if I don't join

They need to do fewer of them, so kids whose parents can't come don't feel excluded

BaronessEllarawrosaurus · 05/10/2023 07:38

My dd's school did this in reception thankfully apart from the Christmas performance (evening) and sports day they only did these events in the first term of reception

EthicalNonMahogany · 05/10/2023 07:45

Yeah, don't think there should be any. Teach the bloody children, help them enjoy the school community, have one thing a year we need to come to.

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