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AIBU?

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Original poster

Is there some sort of app or website to fill in to see if division of tasks is unreasonable;

35 replies

jackstini · 04/10/2023 08:34

I know this topic is often a bone of contention on MN, but it's not the easiest thing to work out

Just wondering if anything exists where you can fill in/tick boxes on who does what in working, chores, childcare, admin, mental load etc. and it then calculates how many hours each is actually doing, so the proof is there in black and white?

If so - please share!

If not - can MN or one of you please invent it?!

OP posts:
GasPanic · 04/10/2023 12:32

How about this app.

The chore master enters all the chores and time frequency and who to allocate them to. Then every time the chore is due it dings the phone of the chorer and keeps dinging every day it until the chore is signed off by the chore master.

You can have different alert modes, so one will alert the chorer one day before the chore is due, and a weekly list is sent. A mix up mode assigns the chores randomly rather than to each individual. "Teenager" mode disables the wifi on the smartphone of anyone who doesn't complete the chore after 3 dings and can only be unblocked by the chore master. A gold star is earned for every chore signed off as completed within 1 hour of a ding.

Auto mode transfers the chore master management completely to the smartphone so it can run your life. I for one welcome our new smartphone overlords.

Goodgrief83 · 04/10/2023 14:58

arethereanyleftatall · 04/10/2023 11:41

I'm sorry but this is just stupidity.
Because it will depend completely on your own unique set of circumstances.
For some people 'cooking' could be 2 hours, for other 2 seconds.
'Cleaning' a house would depend completely on the size of your house and your standard.
'Life admin' could be 2 seconds if you do nothing, or hours if your child is an international dancer.
Etc etc

This. This. This

Goodgrief83 · 04/10/2023 15:01

jackstini · 04/10/2023 11:59

Not stupidity at all - but thanks for your kind comment🙄

An app where you could put all that in would then work it out!

Obviously everyone's circumstances are different but It would ask you how big your house is, size of family, number of cars, pets, holidays, commitments, work hours etc.

If your kids don't do extra curricular activities you put in 0 hours against that; if they dance 6 days out of 7 you put in X hours - it's not rocket science

Show quote history

But the time Someone would spend on cleaning for example varies enormously for the same room for example

bathroom clean for one person is 10 mins
for another 45 mins

they both will regard as job done

Fieldofbrokenpromises · 04/10/2023 15:04

Goodgrief83 · 04/10/2023 15:01

But the time Someone would spend on cleaning for example varies enormously for the same room for example

bathroom clean for one person is 10 mins
for another 45 mins

they both will regard as job done

Show quote history

Totally agree - it’s crazy to imagine some marvellous app will do anything you can’t do with a pen and paper or excel.

CantMoveCatOnMyLap · 04/10/2023 15:04

I think it’s a good idea. I think our split is fair and we don’t argue about it but it would be interesting to see (I suspect I’m the one not pulling my weight, but my tasks are often the invisible ones too)

Fieldofbrokenpromises · 04/10/2023 15:05

And in order to be “accurate” you need to go into so much detail you might as well just work it out.

arethereanyleftatall · 04/10/2023 15:13

Fieldofbrokenpromises · 04/10/2023 15:05

And in order to be “accurate” you need to go into so much detail you might as well just work it out.

Can you imagine it?

'Darling - what do you think I should put in this cell on the spreadsheet for cleaning the bathroom?'
'Go with 1 hour per week'
'Ok, agree, done'

Being more difficult than a totally genetic app which has to account for every conceivable option...

  1. How many bathrooms do you have?
  2. Please enter the exact dimensions of your bathroom?
  3. Do you have any excessive skidders in your house? How many?
  4. What level of cleanliness do you require?
  5. What length is your hair and how likely are you to spend time fishing hair out of the plug.
  6. Do you have any guests staying this week in the en-suite?

Etc etc

Goodgrief83 · 04/10/2023 15:24

arethereanyleftatall · 04/10/2023 15:13

Can you imagine it?

'Darling - what do you think I should put in this cell on the spreadsheet for cleaning the bathroom?'
'Go with 1 hour per week'
'Ok, agree, done'

Being more difficult than a totally genetic app which has to account for every conceivable option...

  1. How many bathrooms do you have?
  2. Please enter the exact dimensions of your bathroom?
  3. Do you have any excessive skidders in your house? How many?
  4. What level of cleanliness do you require?
  5. What length is your hair and how likely are you to spend time fishing hair out of the plug.
  6. Do you have any guests staying this week in the en-suite?

Etc etc

Show quote history

Does anyone in the family regularly suffer from diarrhoea?

Summonedbybees · 04/10/2023 15:27

Some MN like to talk about mental load but they do not include all financial and diy type jobs. They like to talk about the mental load of buying cards and gifts but not about sweeping patios, decorating inside and out, clearing out gutters etc. In other words they count the jobs they do and recognise but not the ones they do not take responsibility for doing.

Original poster
jackstini · 04/10/2023 16:35

Summonedbybees · 04/10/2023 15:27

Some MN like to talk about mental load but they do not include all financial and diy type jobs. They like to talk about the mental load of buying cards and gifts but not about sweeping patios, decorating inside and out, clearing out gutters etc. In other words they count the jobs they do and recognise but not the ones they do not take responsibility for doing.

Thank you! This is exactly it - we don't want to miss anything out, and didn't want to start from scratch if there is already something out there!

Division of labour is a very common topic on MN, so thought it would be useful to others too - no idea why some posters are being snippy

If people haven't got an answer to the actual question of 'does anything exist already set up to do this?' - then I don't really need you to comment on why I should not need or want it

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