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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To love football but have no interest whatsover in women's football league

177 replies

Eastie77Returns · 29/09/2023 18:50

I've been a football fan since childhood and have attended matches for years. Both DS and DD play and I'm really glad they've both taken to the sport. DD's best friend also plays and her mum sent me a message the other day suggesting we take the girls to watch a WSL game. I support a Premier League team so not always easy to get tickets whereas their women's team (one of the teams in the game the mum suggested we watch) always has availability.

I feel bad for admiting this but I have zero interest in Women's football. I have been to a few games but it's just not the same. I simply can't get as engaged as I do watching the men's game and I really don't care if the women playing for the team I support win or lose.

I admitted this to the mum and she was shocked! I got the feeling she feels I am literally letting the side (our side) down.😭

OP posts:
TheLightProgramme · 29/09/2023 20:00

You are socially conditioned to expect the men's team.

My kid is near 7 and has been raised seeing our women's teams as successful champions, he is completely neutral about whether he's watching men's or women's and was unbelievably excited about the final in the summer.

Smartiepants79 · 29/09/2023 20:07

Eastie77Returns · 29/09/2023 19:31

I’m not sure loving both your children is analogous to liking both men’s and women’s football😂

WSL seems to have a lot of support so I think they’ll be okay without mine. I’m not going to force myself to like something that truly bores me. I do wish I felt differently.

Show quote history

So your DD plays football??
But you can’t bring yourself to support the women who would be her role models? Who have fought for equality in this sport and made it possible for your Dd to play without it being weird and ‘tomboyish’.
Womens football is the only thing that’s interesting to watch right now. They keep winning, the men just get overpaid.

Queucumber · 29/09/2023 20:09

It’s team sport where there’s the biggest difference in terms of attitude towards the women’s game vs the men’s game. The gap is a lot smaller with tennis. I don’t think many of us watch the Olympics thinking, I hope this women’s long jump finishes soon so we can get on with the main event, the men’s long jump. A brilliant 1500m win isn’t seen as lesser if you’re a woman.

Dramatic · 29/09/2023 20:10

I went to see the Lionesses play Scotland last week and both teams were absolutely fantastic, it was great to see in person and affirmed by belief that the women's game is as good as the men's.

Torganer · 29/09/2023 20:12

There are lots of things I have no interest in, but my children like them. Hated soft play with a passion!! It’s cheap(er) than a PML match, your daughter and her friend can go and see professionals at the sport they play, I can’t really see an issue?

I LOVE cricket, my husband started to come with me to watch it having no interest in it previously, now loves it.

My father is a massive football fan, was very dismissive of women’s football, but watched all the World Cup matches and became a fan.

There are a lot of things as a parent you’re just going to have to endure for the pleasure of your children. Just pick your battles, I don’t really see this as an issue at all though!

BigFatLiar · 29/09/2023 20:17

I'd take her to the match simplyvas it's a trip out with friends. We've been to sports events that we've no real interest in but simply enjoyed the day out with friends.

Mouldyfoodhelp · 29/09/2023 20:18

WorkingItOutAsIGo · 29/09/2023 19:25

Actually, you’re all wrong. It’s a different game, sure, but if you don’t support it and give it a chance who will? And what does that say to young women? Your daughters? If you have more than one child, do you manage to love them both? Think of this as the same. There are lovely players, lovely stories, sisterhood and drama everywhere. Give it a shot and help it grow. If not for you, for the young women around you.

I'm not wrong i like what I like, what the women did was excellent but it feels like there's been a sudden explosion of people ( a lot that won't actually put the effort in themselves) in the last 2 years ( since the euros) that have told those that watch the men's football that they have to watch the women's and its silly.

If people watched football they'd understand each team, leagues have their own characteristics upon which they are built so if you aren't a fan of the style of football that you've seen the women play that's not the person's fault.

I remember when Supergirl first aired on TV and there was a push that we had to watch it as it was important for their to be women represented in superheroes. A while later whilst those that campaigned for people to watch it had moved on to their next cause I stayed watching it because I enjoyed it ( post the initial over the top feminist I'm as good as superman and im a woman! Episodes) there's only so much time in the day.

Besides viewership is only one measurement. People need to spend money on women's players merchandise, create content around it and so much that goes unnoticed to the uninformed that most viewers of the men's game don't even realise.

Thally · 29/09/2023 20:18

Excellent, for the club we support it's becoming way too popular. Don't need anyone else making it harder to get tickets.

FourFourOne · 29/09/2023 20:20

I don’t care for football at all, but do make an effort to watch women’s matches with my kids. I have a young son and daughter and I want it to be normalised for them.

I read that there has been a massive increase in demand for girls’ football teams in England of late (presumably due in part to the visibility of the Lionesses), and think it’s so important to show young girls strong female role models in sport

RunningFromInsanity · 29/09/2023 20:22

Same. Season ticket holder but no interest in woman’s football unfortunately. I did watch a bit of the Women’s England Euros but wasn’t thrilled.

luckylavender · 29/09/2023 20:22

Eastie77Returns · 29/09/2023 18:50

I've been a football fan since childhood and have attended matches for years. Both DS and DD play and I'm really glad they've both taken to the sport. DD's best friend also plays and her mum sent me a message the other day suggesting we take the girls to watch a WSL game. I support a Premier League team so not always easy to get tickets whereas their women's team (one of the teams in the game the mum suggested we watch) always has availability.

I feel bad for admiting this but I have zero interest in Women's football. I have been to a few games but it's just not the same. I simply can't get as engaged as I do watching the men's game and I really don't care if the women playing for the team I support win or lose.

I admitted this to the mum and she was shocked! I got the feeling she feels I am literally letting the side (our side) down.😭

That's not a great example for your DD.

Original poster
Eastie77Returns · 29/09/2023 20:22

@Smartiepants79 I do support the women’s games in the sense that I have taken the DC to games in the past and of course I’m glad female players exist and provide DD with role models.

I’m proud DD plays for the local girls team.

But I’m not going to pretend I feel the same watching both sexes (adults). I’ve followed the mens team since I was 5 years old and have memories of my brothers taking me to games when I was small, going with friends, memorable games etc. I can’t force myself to generate the same nostalgia and feeling for the women’s team. I do not feel a connection to them and I don’t think the quality is the same.

I’ve concealed my feelings from my DC, as evidenced by the fact DS loves the WSL.

OP posts:
Dramatic · 29/09/2023 20:23

Mouldyfoodhelp · 29/09/2023 20:18

I'm not wrong i like what I like, what the women did was excellent but it feels like there's been a sudden explosion of people ( a lot that won't actually put the effort in themselves) in the last 2 years ( since the euros) that have told those that watch the men's football that they have to watch the women's and its silly.

If people watched football they'd understand each team, leagues have their own characteristics upon which they are built so if you aren't a fan of the style of football that you've seen the women play that's not the person's fault.

I remember when Supergirl first aired on TV and there was a push that we had to watch it as it was important for their to be women represented in superheroes. A while later whilst those that campaigned for people to watch it had moved on to their next cause I stayed watching it because I enjoyed it ( post the initial over the top feminist I'm as good as superman and im a woman! Episodes) there's only so much time in the day.

Besides viewership is only one measurement. People need to spend money on women's players merchandise, create content around it and so much that goes unnoticed to the uninformed that most viewers of the men's game don't even realise.

Show quote history

But how can you say all women's football is the same style? You're saying each men's team has its characteristics etc, so do the women. I remember when I first started watching the Lionesses a few years ago (probably around 2016/2017) it felt odd and jarring to be watching England but not England as I knew it (the men's team) but I persisted and within a couple of years I found that I had the same amount of affection and longing for them to win as I did with the mens team. I got to know the regular players, their personalities, how they gelled and moved as a team.

Mouldyfoodhelp · 29/09/2023 20:23

G5000 · 29/09/2023 19:32

you don't have to be interested in anything but come on, quality?

Yes quality, these clips are highly edited and unfortunately for the women's game goalkeeper is one of the biggest issues as they use the same size goals as the men's but a 6ft goalkeeper is still considered somewhat small and as we know a lot of women are shorter which gives attackers the advantage

SophiaElise · 29/09/2023 20:24

I've been a (men's) football fan since forever and while it'll be cheaper and less painful if I didn't support my team (premier league team, wins nothing), supporting them is part of my life and has been since childhood.

Women's football seems like a new sport to me, and I feel a fraud when I talk about it with friends who've followed it for years. I support them in international competitions though, but I don't follow their domestic or even champions league exploits.

It's not internalised sexism for me as I'm the opposite with tennis - much prefer the women's game which I follow all year round. I only watch the men's game during grand slam events.

PostItInABook · 29/09/2023 20:25

Surely taking your DC to experience this regularly is more important than your like or dislike of it? It sends a message doesn’t it? Especially to young girls interested in football. If you’re showing your love for men’s football and disdain for women’s football…..what message is that sending to your dd?

Torganer · 29/09/2023 20:26

Eastie77Returns · 29/09/2023 20:22

@Smartiepants79 I do support the women’s games in the sense that I have taken the DC to games in the past and of course I’m glad female players exist and provide DD with role models.

I’m proud DD plays for the local girls team.

But I’m not going to pretend I feel the same watching both sexes (adults). I’ve followed the mens team since I was 5 years old and have memories of my brothers taking me to games when I was small, going with friends, memorable games etc. I can’t force myself to generate the same nostalgia and feeling for the women’s team. I do not feel a connection to them and I don’t think the quality is the same.

I’ve concealed my feelings from my DC, as evidenced by the fact DS loves the WSL.

You don’t need to pretend anything though? You just need to take them to a game. As you said it’s cheap, they can all watch live football.

Do you only take your children to things you’re passionate about? I don’t. My mum used to take me to the cricket and read a book!

Mouldyfoodhelp · 29/09/2023 20:28

Dramatic · 29/09/2023 19:47

Yeah I'm slightly baffled by this thread tbh, the women's game tends to flow much better and they're less likely to dive. The skill levels are at least championship level, if not better. As a fan of a struggling championship team I'd say the WSL is better skill wise.

Show quote history

This just isn't true though is it? A Wrexham side beat a representative US women's national side 12-0 just this summer. I know it wasn't the women's first team but still and there's plenty of examples of young academy sides beating women's side ( although I can't remember the teams a women's team did beat one this summer!)

ghostyslovesheets · 29/09/2023 20:29

I kind of understand - we have been to a fair number of Women's FA cup finals etc and I do follow my teams women's team because they are better! I watch England Women as well - don't watch all England's men's matches.

My two eldest both play - one watches both men and women's games - the other, who is obsessed with football doesn't watch - she's just not interested

I guess it's just down to what you like?

Vitriolinsanity · 29/09/2023 20:37

I have a very talented goddaughter who plays for a league side. Whilst I support her and women's football, I agree that the men's league is what interests me.

Vitriolinsanity · 29/09/2023 20:39

Let's be clearer. If you have me the choice between Men's Arsenal and Women, I'd pick men's.

Mumbleer · 29/09/2023 20:44

I agree with you, having followed my PL team since the early 90s when I was very young. I think the difference between men's PL and women's PL is too stark and I can't seem to get into it.

I do try and watch England women's though and enjoyed the game vs Spain in the Euros which felt like a good quality game which I remember being surprised by.

But I also can't watch men's lower leagues for the same reason so I don't feel too bad 🤷🏻‍♀️

Original poster
Eastie77Returns · 29/09/2023 20:46

Yes, it’s simply a preference. I don’t know why this constitutes ‘internalised sexism’.

It’s a bizarre argument that women must support other women’s efforts regardless of preference or the quality of those efforts.

If I’m bored stiff watching WSL why should I continue taking my DC just because women are playing. It doesn’t make sense.

I’m also modelling behaviour to DD that she shouldn’t force herself to do things she doesn’t want to because other people thing it’s the done thing. A valuable life lesson for any woman.

DD’s friends mum is happy to take her and I can return the favour and take her DD to another activity.

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 29/09/2023 20:47

G5000 · 29/09/2023 19:32

you don't have to be interested in anything but come on, quality?

LOL

I was just going to post that advert.

Good call.

CMZ2018 · 29/09/2023 20:49

Agree, it’s utter shit, zero interest in it