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Original poster

Partner making digs/comments at me

18 replies

Leena95 · 29/09/2023 15:34

So dp is constantly making remarks about me and it’s really starting to wear me down.

a quick example: we just collected our dc from school and they have got paint all on their school shirts (again). He asked me how many times this has happened and I said a couple. He asked me if I’m going to speak to the teacher and I said yes. He then asked why I haven’t and I told him I’ve been trying to all week but at the end of the school day the teacher is always busy with so many parents so I haven’t got around to it yet. He told me I should send an email and then proceeded to say ‘I’ve impregnated a dumbass’.

it sounds so petty but it’s constant comments and remarks like that every day. Constantly calling me stupid etc. I mean here and there I could take as a joke but when it’s everyday hearing these things it’s just wearing me down.

am I being over the top? Am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
Wishitsnows · 29/09/2023 15:35

He is abusive. Make plans to leave

RipleyAndThePebble · 29/09/2023 15:38

That's awful, so corrosive. I can’t imagine talking to him will be of any use at all, because a decent person just wouldn’t behave in that way. I’d not be able to love this man, and I reckon you deserve more.

Ace56 · 29/09/2023 15:39

Do you call him out on it? ‘Sorry, what the fuck did you just say?’

Don’t allow him to treat you like this. Also why doesn’t he speak to the teacher if he’s that concerned!

Jellycatspyjamas · 29/09/2023 15:40

I’m sorry, a partner would speak to me like that once, and his dumbass would be out the door. Respect is a pretty low bar that everyone in my life needs to reach.

Freezingcoldinseptember · 29/09/2023 15:41

Imagine your dd with a dh like this. Or your ds speaking to a woman like this. If you can't see you need to leave for yourself then leave for your dc's sake...in the future they won't blame you for leaving but may do so for staying..

GabriellaMontez · 29/09/2023 15:44

Fucking hell. What an obnoxious tosser he is.

tescocreditcard · 29/09/2023 15:44

That's a horrible thing to say 😕

ThreePointOneFourOneFiveNine · 29/09/2023 15:45

You most certainly not being unreasonable, what you are being is abused. I'm sorry you have had the misfortune to be stuck with this man, and you will be stuck with him forever through co parenting, but you need to get away from him as much as possible. He is just plain nasty.

FWIW kids coming home with paint on school clothes is completely normal and nothing to email a teacher about.

MissMillyFluff · 29/09/2023 15:47

You are definitely not being unreasonable. Those shitty comments would wear anyone down. What a nasty little man! Let him know it's not acceptable to speak to you that way.

Ladyj84 · 29/09/2023 15:48

Is he joking jeeez kids get paint dirt whatever on them daily. You either need to stand up to him and say how uncalled for those names he calls you are or walk away your worth more

RudsyFarmer · 29/09/2023 15:53

And you replied?…….

Coachvikki · 29/09/2023 15:54

That doesn't sound petty, it sounds abusive.

Letitgonowgr · 29/09/2023 15:55

He sounds like a prick!
Kids get messy at school though and ours just admitted they haven’t used washable paint and it won’t come off but not to worry as they don’t care what they look like!

cuddlebear · 29/09/2023 15:56

He’s horrible.

What options do you have?

Cowlover89 · 29/09/2023 16:00

LTB

wildwestpioneer · 29/09/2023 16:00

He asked me how many times this has happened and I said a couple. He asked me if I’m going to speak to the teacher - not yet, but if you feel it's important feel free to speak to school yourself

He then asked why I haven’t - ive been busy and haven't been able to, but you can try and talk to them

He told me I should send an email and then proceeded to say ‘I’ve impregnated a dumbass’. you are more than capable of sending an email twat face, and whilst your at it, use the computer to look for another house to move into as I won't put up with being called names and I'm not your personal assistant

That should do it

HoneyBadgerMom · 29/09/2023 16:06

I'm so sick of this. It's the latest craze for men: treat your wife/girlfriend like trash, insult her, break her spirit and tear her down, convince her she is SO lucky that you'd even bother with her. Once her self esteem is gone and she hates herself, you can cheat on her in her face, lie to her, neglect your family and live your life as a single guy while she slaves in the background.

It's an MRA, red-pill, misogynist dream, sold to men by the likes of Andrew Tate, Kevin Samuels, and Jordan Peterson, and they call it "being an alpha" and "reclaiming your place as a man." 🙄

If this is new behavior, check through his internet history. Smart money says he's been listening to that red pill, "He man woman's haters club" garbage.

If it's not new behavior, he's a jerk and I'd start making an escape plan ASAP, because you're going to be on your own with your children anyway, there's no need to also have to wait on his lazy behind day in and day out.

jeaux90 · 29/09/2023 17:05

It's not petty it's disgraceful and if my partner spoke to me like that it would be only the once.

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