AIBU - husband wants me to work more / earn more

[ClippyClopp]

Im a freelancer. I can only work 40 weeks per year due to most of my work being within schools. I currently work 25 hours per week earning about £1k per week give or take.

my husband works far harder and longer hours. We are both self employed. We have three teenagers. I do vast majority or household stuff which is fine as I work less. We are comfortable financially.

He’s always making me feel bad, making comments about me being ‘part time’ and how I should be maximising my income when I’m able to.

my argument is I (we) have a good work life / family balance and I would feel stressed increasing my hours, (it’s very intense mentally) plus we manage fine financially- have pension, savings and have paid off the mortgage.

he feels insecure (financially) as we are both self employed. We have a good relationship mostly but this is causing animosity.

AIBU?

Yanbu. You are successful, work in what sounds like an intense role and don't need the money. It's the MN classic. Don't set yourself on fire to keep someone else warm.

And by warm, I mean that it sounds as though your husband is resentful. If he thinks his job is vulnerable or is otherwise worried about money, he needs to talk to you like an adult about it.

There are obviously other issues, but you are certainly a part-time worker

So you earn a fair amount abd do all the housework childcare and mental load

i think you need him to write down what he does other than work, what you do and exactly how if you increased your hours that would get done

What do you mean by other issues?

Hmmm, you sound amazing. He sounds like a whinger.

3 teenagers? What does he bring to the table?

No sharing the domestic or family load I guess.

Why do women put up with this?

I had one of them. Got rid. My adult child isn't dependent on a woman. YEA.

That’s a good idea!

I guess overall I (we) are happy- it’s just lately he’s been a bit grumpy about this.

If he’s worried about you both freelancing he’s welcome to get a permanent role for more stability. Has he considered that?

You are earning c. £1k a week PT, 40 weeks a year. That’s about £40k gross.

How much does he earn? How much does he think you should be earning?

If he’s resentful because you don’t have to work FT or all year round, then he needs to have a sensible discussion about that (and potentially get over himself - men who choose to work long hours and then are resentful of that choice are deeply irritating).

So you’re working 40 weeks of the year and earning £42000(?)
And you carry the mental load?

What on earth is he moaning about? Is he usually like this? Is he setting up an argument?
Presumably even if you work more you'll both still be self employed, so will he still have an issue?