To TTC earlier because work is 'meh'?

[Fluffymarsh]

Plan was to TTC in June 2024. However, I'm feeling very 'meh' about work, and I really feel its contributing to my broodiness.

I want a baby anyway, but I'm tempted to just kickstart my TTC plans because I'm sick of work and would like (ideally, if I fall pregnant quickly which I'd be very surprised about as I've been diagnosed with Endo) to be working towards mat leave.

However, then I feel silly because it's not like mat leave means you're off and having the time of your life, I expect its much harder work than work!

Reasons for June 2024 TTC is because I'm maid of honour at a wedding end of May which is in Italy and I really don't want to be ill for it, if I do fall pregnant! Also, I've only worked here for 2 years in April 😳

Anyone felt the same? Did your feelings about work speed up your TTC plans? Should I stick to my original plans?

I was a heavily pregnant bridesmaid. I did tell my friend when she asked me that I was TTC, and she was absolutely fine with it. You've got good reasons why you'd decided on that timing,, what would the effect be if you conceived now? My big concern is that you'd likely be obviously pregnant before your two years so work could just dump you.

Life’s short, you’ll make whatever circumstances you have work and you’ll be happy about it especially if you have a little bundle of joy.
If you’ve not conceived by February I’d maybe pause till May though just so you don’t have morning sickness for Italy, if you were going to.

Also work can’t dump you cos you’re pregnant

Just start if that's what you want.

There's an exception to the "no employment rights before 2 years" and that's in relation to discrimination so work are unlikely to dump you. I think that work being meh is probably a better reason to influence your timing of TTC than a wedding really, not that it's anyone's business but yours. Just strikes me that if you wait you're kind of stuck in a rut for several months, and then you might find it takes time to get pregnant anyway and that rut extends. I do understand the wedding thing and probably timed TTC for a similar reason but really it was a tiny factor in the mix. People have their own weddings while pregnant after all

Start trying, especially as you have endo. Timing is never perfect, but these things have a way of working their way out.

They can and they will. Sure you can go after them through the courts, but that that's very stressful, and there's no guarantee you'll win. Companies will make up all sorts of nonsense about poor performance. You have very little rights before two years, and from a company point of view they're looking at the definite cost of maternity leave verses the possible cost of paying compensation if a pregnant woman feels able to fight for her rights, which many don't. I may be being cynical, but I've seen a lot of evidence that's made me cynical. I wouldn't trust any company not to do it.

@ThreePointOneFourOneFiveNine yes, work is a concern. The wedding too because I've paid a lot to be there and selfishly I don't fancy being ill, but my work is worrying me more.

My heart is saying just go for it, because you could be ttcing for a while but my head is saying what's another 9 months, seeing as I'm only 27. The thought of working for even longer while everything is 'meh' is pulling me towards ttc too though 😅

Hmm it depends who you work for. Private company possibly. NHS or public sector could and would not.

Fluffy seriously you’ll be fine especially if you’re part of a union. Not everyone waits to be in a job 2 years before having a baby. :)

There’s no guarantee you’ll be ill, I never had any kind of sickness in any of my pregnancies. If you have known issues that might make it difficult to conceive then I’d never recommend delaying due to something that might happen. Without wanting to sound condescending and only because I’ve been through the mill trying to have my baby, that’s a very naive outlook, one that only someone who hasn’t suffered with infertility can have.

i was a pregnant maid of honour at 12 weeks (peak sickness for me but it was fine) and i also got pregnant 4 months into starting a new job. your work will deal with it if you fall pregnant - if it’s any consolation i’m not even back off mat leave yet and i’m pregnant again😅

I’d just go for it unless you need to put it off for financial reasons.

If it helps, for DC2 I’d only been in my job a year, and for DC1 I’d only been there six weeks when I got pregnant 😂

If work is "meh", are you likely to want to change job any time soon? If you change while you are pregnant you don't get maternity pay (although you might get maternity allowance, but that is less). Does your work give you any additional maternity pay or is it just statutory? If they give you additional pay you might have to work for them for some time after mat leave or they might ask you to pay it back. Basically once you are pregnant you have more to lose if you change jobs, is it worth looking for a new one now?

If you got pregnant quickly you might not be able to fly ?
If work is Meh , look for another job?

@satellitesunshine lol that's made me chuckle, congrats though! I suppose I am being a bit daft. I'm sure like PP has said, people fall pregnant before the 2 year mark a lot.

@Pollywoddles that's OK, I appreciate your insight (I don't find it condescending). Its just I've also got to consider the possibility I could get pregnant quickly too. However, you're right - I might not get this luxury especially with my endo. Lots to think about.

@greyhairnomore my worry about looking for another job is that I have a long notice period, so by the time I get an interview, an offer, work my notice period, then I'll need to prevent pregnancy until I qualify for the mat leave at my new work!

And @JC89 I get enhanced pay for 6 months. I'd be happy going back. My work is so relaxed, which is why I'm bored. However, it's pretty perfect IMO for having a young baby as I wouldn't be stressed much. Just no challenge.