To beg you for help on stopping binging

[Reallyfatandmiserable]

I’ve tried it all. Dieting, not dieting, hypnotherapy, not having food in the house, eating well. Last night after I ate FOUR cadburys chocolate yoghurts in a row I wondered if I could burn off the sweet taste buds in my tongue so that I just fucking stop. I’m addicted to sugar. It’s disgusting. I eat an obscene amount of it every day, I waste money on it, I’m ashamed every time I go into one of my local shops and wonder what they think of me. I have had blood tests and all of fine. I take magnesium tablets and it doesn’t change. I try adding cinnamon and it doesn’t work. I have a good diet most of the time, but I binge on chocolate every single day. I have told my GP and nothing. I contacted BEAT and they were useless. I told my counsellor and she mostly dismisses it.

I can’t do this any more. It’s ruining my life. I have ADHD and I presume this might be a response to that. I’ve been doing it since I was a child but it is out of control.

And PLEASE don’t just say things like ‘yo just stop eating it’. If you’ve never had a severe addiction then you don’t understand. And this is like an addiction. Smokers don’t quit smoking after being told to just stop, it doesn’t work like that, I wish to god it did. It’s an eating disorder I guess. I can’t cope.

Please, if you quit sugar, how did you do it? I can’t carry on like this.

I live on my own except for my toddler. I like the idea of forcing myself to go out without any money at all and trying to restrict myself further, I’m going to give that a try on top of some of the other suggestions here.

I’d say this dopamine seeking caused by your ADHD. Is the setraline for depression? I’d ask for a med review and speak about proper adhd meds.

My sister was a binge eater and really overweight, it stopped when her DH died because he had been making her miserable for 30 odd years. I know a lot of disordered eating is linked to mood but even if you have tried tackling past issues possibly look to your current life set up. Partner you hate , neighbours from hell, job that makes you depressed.

She lost six stone and has kept it off for over six years.

I’m so sorry, it’s so tough. I haven’t told anyone in my personal life because of the shame. People don’t seem to get it, they think you’re just eating too much out of greed, but it’s not that at all.

Wow, your poor sister. Glad to hear she is doing better health-wise. The problem is this started when I was a child. I have lots of mementoes of stealing chocolate. I guess it must be childhood related but I don’t know of anything that triggered it. Unless it’s ADHD related.

Yes definitely going to do this.‘I feel really let down by the GPS and their involvement, so I’m going to get an appointment

OP, you mentioned smoking. Well, I quit by reading Allen Carr's Easy Way to Stop Smoking.

He also wrote a book called Easy Weigh To Lose Weight. Now, I haven't read it, I have no idea if it works. But his stop smoking book has worked for a lot of people. You'll find a copy of this online for just a few quid, why not try it? It's something different.

Any chance you might have polycystic ovarian syndrome? I do. I used to crave chocolate. My GP put me on Metformin which is a diabetes drug for the PCOS symptoms (irregular periods, struggling to conceive, hairyness) and it helped with all those things but also I lost weight and pretty much lost interest in sweet stuff as well. I don't take it anymore, I stopped at some point in my pregnancy but even now I don't seem to crave sugary foods like before. I don't have diabetes so it was being used off label I think. But it's a pretty common use of the drug.

I remember a friend using his smoking book. I’ll have a look at his weight loss book, thank you

Yep I used the smoking book too. It worked for me.

Hi OP, I’m sorry you’re struggling. I had bulimia but I have luckily managed to overcome it - though mine wasn’t as long standing as yours so that might be why.

You say you have a counsellor - it sounds to me like you need a therapist who specialises in EDs. Can you afford to pay privately? If so, that might be the way to go. If not, these are the NICE guidelines for treating EDs so it might be worth looking to see if you have been offered what you should be offered on the NHS.

https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/ng69/chapter/Recommendations#treating-binge-eating-disorder

Whatever you do in the meantime, don’t try and restrict yourself in any way with food…that is a guaranteed way to trigger binges.

I do this. It works for me.

Also keeping chopped carrot sticks in the fridge at the front.

@Reallyfatandmiserable He tackles the psychological aspect of it, and maybe that'll help you. Good luck.

I wish I could offer advice op

I have a problem with sugar but nowhere near as extreme as yours. I find if I really fill myself up on healthy filling foods I either feel too full for sugary food or the craving edges off slightly. I've tried eating salty snacks when I'm really craving sugar and that has worked somewhat in the past. Also just like a big lump of cheddar. It doesn't cure the underlying issue though.

I know exactly how you feel though, when the craving kicks in I'll do anything to get hold of sugar

I do feel your pain. What you describe I absolutely recognise from my own life.

Have you come across Gillian Riley's approach ? I'd really encourage you to have a look at her free ted talk.

https://eatingless.com

Nowadays, when ever am deciding (or rather choosing) what to eat, I consider how it will make me feel after I've eaten it. If I will feel good, I'll eat it. If I will feet sluggish, lethargic and guilty, I'll probably not bother.

The message is very, very simple but certainly not easy. It took me several 'goes' and completely eliminating sugar from my diet in order to really get to grips with her approach.

Getting the sugar out of my life really, really helps me to feel I'm in control of what I eat. Many of us find that there are chemical reactions in our brains when we eat sugar that set us up on. Blood sugar rollercoaster. None needs that in their lives.

I'm very glad I did. It's changed my life in so many ways that I could not have expected.

Hope you find what works for you.

I could have written your post. Although to be honest the 4 chocolate yoghurts wouldn't have touched the sides. :)

Im ashamed to admit to anyone how much sugar I consume, it's quite unbelievable. People think they know sugar addiction 'oh I finished off a whole family bar of chocolate'. But to me thats just a normal persons behaviour who has a bit of a sweet tooth.

I can't see anything on this thread that would stop me eating. At the moment (from literally today), I have removed Apple Pay off my phone so I have no access to money. I remove my make up and put on my dressing gown as soon as I get home so I can't go back out again to the shop. And most ridiculously I am stopping my 3 year olds naps so I don't have that luxurious hour to binge eat. I also drink a lot of Diet Coke too like a previous poster.

Best of luck OP, if you crack it, please come back and let me know :)

One small step at a time, OP, eg replace one of your favourite binge items with something nice but less unhealthy. (I like those sugar free boiled sweets. You get a prolonged hit of sweetness that satisfies the sugar cravings.) Self control takes time to develop. Changing your habits in tiny increments, allowing each change to 'bed in' before you move on to the next, stops that cycle of trying to do it one go then failing.

Please pm I cam recommend a counsellor

If this is your coping mechanism, you have to address the underlying problem/circumstances you are trying to "cope" with and only then act on your sugar cravings. I used to binge and purge constantly while being trapped in a very toxic working environment nothing would break the cycle - but literally, the day I left the company, it was all sorted as if by magic. I bought my usual assortment for the evening, and then had 3 mozzarella sticks and that was it, I didn't want to finish that tray of snacks, didnt feel the need to purge afterwards. That terrible "itch" was just gone.

Hello @Reallyfatandmiserable

Sorry to hear of these struggles which sound really difficult.

What strikes me in all your posts is that you do not mention your feelings much at all.

What are the feelings that you try to avoid by eating like this?

I realise you might well not be able to answer this question, or you might not want to.

This definitely helps me to kill any sort of craving outside of my fixed mealtimes.

I've been a binge eater off and on my whole adult life and I feel as though now (at aged 50) I'm finally getting some control over it. Here's a few things that work for me:

• I work from home and make sure I'm up, dressed and ready to work by 9am every day. Then I have a cup of tea with honey - but only AFTER I've done at least a smidge of exercise: currently, I'm doing planks (which hurt like helll)! The tea with honey is my 'reward' for the planks.
• I've started small routines - and introduced new elements very gradually. So, for instance, being up and ready to work by 9am - every day, no exceptions. Previously, I would stig around in my pyjamas until 10 or 11am and that would give rise to feelings of not, actually, being properly 'present in the day'... and I'd allow myself to slide into harmful or unhelpful behaviours because of that.
• don't try to do too much at once - very gradually increase your activity level; whether it's exercise or housework or anything else. I've built up the planks from 1 x 1min plank per day to currently aiming for 1 x 1min plank every hour of the working day. My abs are like steel.... albeit still nestling under a layer of fat, ha ha.
• find some health-focused podcasts and listen to one or two a week - again, I didn't go hell for leather listening to or watching everything I could find on improving my health because you end up with too many messages and too much info to process. I'm currently really enjoying Davinia Taylor's podcast series; 'Hack your Health' on Spotify.
• food-wise, a previous poster said to go completely cold turkey on sugar and I have to agree with this. I would easily eat four donuts in a row and a whole box of Mr Kiplings (and make sure the packaging was disposed of so my husband didn't see it). Sugar was my love and my nemesis! My husband doesn't have a sweet tooth at all, so it's been easy not to have sugary foods in the house.
• My moods were tied to what I ate and what I ate was tied to my moods. I try hard not to let myself get drawn into patterns of thought that lead to moods that would, ordinarily, lead to me wanting to binge. I'm not someone easily given to 'positive thinking' - by nature I can be melancholic and pessimistic. Changing my mindset is, I can honestly say, the biggest single 'thing' that's helped me find a way out of binge eating. It sounds so obvious but reframing your thoughts and diverting the potential for a binge is a truly life-changing skill - or, at least, it has been for me. If your therapist isn't helping on this score, I would definitely suggest finding a different therapist who can help and understands binge eating properly.

Best of luck, OP. I wish you well.

Feeling fat or looking fat is enough to put me off food. If I ate lots of things in one sitting I would be freaking out, thinking how much weight I would put on. Try and stick to three meals a day. No need for snacks whether they're sugary or not.

My binge is carbs.
My way of dealing with it is to eat 3 meals a day and 2 snacks. No weighing as it sets me off. Within those meals I include carbs.
And I treat it as an addiction.

To echo previous posters, it doesn’t sound as if your ADHD is being medicated correctly. I’ve read other threads on here where Elvanse is used to treat ADHD-related bingeing successfully.
Please go back to your GP and discuss your ADHD treatment. Otherwise I think you’re fighting a losing battle.

Not read the thread but here are some resources that may help:

Brain Over Binge - there's a book, a podcast, and an online course. Many people report that this really helped them
The Binge Eating Therapist - she's on youtube. Also has a book called I Can't Stop Eating - very good. She also has a podcast. Also a practising therapist who takes on clients
The Fuck It Diet - a book by Caroline Dooner
Intuitive Eating - the original version (but I found The Fuck It Diet a more accessible version of this)
There was also a good, longish thread on MN recently - worth searching for.

There's loads more - once you start googling for these, a lot of resources will pop up. Youtube is very good for finding coaches and therapists who will work with you individually if you feel this would help you.

Good luck OP. Many are in recovery from binge eating - it seems impossible to overcome but it's absolutely not! Takes time and patience and finding the resources that work for you.