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Starting Fitness at 40 with Hesitation - Need Advice!

9 replies

CastleGoddess · 28/09/2023 08:32

So, I’m approaching 40 and I feel that putting on weight and it's time to be fit. Never been a gym-goer, but considering starting now. I must admit, though, feeling a bit hesitant and self-conscious about stepping into a gym with loads of fit people around.

I’m curious, have any of you been in the same shoes? A bit intimidated but pushed through it to make the gym a regular part of your routine? Would love some beginner tips and maybe a bit of encouragement. How did you start and get comfortable with the whole gym environment?

Would really appreciate your thoughts or words of encouragement !

OP posts:
nadine90 · 28/09/2023 08:39

It depends what type of gym you go to I think. I’ve been to fancy city centre gyms and felt a bit old and fat! But then at our local authority gyms, it’s such a mix of people - all ages and sizes including much older people. I kept going to the la one as it felt friendlier (and it was much cheaper). Tbh, in both types, no one cares about other people. They are there to do their own thing. Just go for it and see what you think. Good luck x

RandomOrder · 28/09/2023 08:42

I’m the same age as you and this year decided I wanted to be healthy before I turned 40. The thought of the gym absolutely terrified me so I joined an aerobics class that was run from the local church hall. The instructor is very down to Earth and lovely as are the other women who attend - no egos, just a lot of support.

I was convinced I wouldn’t be able to manage even ten minutes but I did the whole class the first time and my fitness has steadily improved each time. I’m now attending much harder classes elsewhere and have muscles for the first time, I’m considering joining the gym and getting a PT so I can get even stronger. I don’t think I could have joined a gym a few months ago. The only thing putting me off the gym now is that I prefer women only spaces but I know there will be places that cater to that as well.

Good luck!

DivergentTris · 28/09/2023 08:43

As a regular gym user and someone who has been going for years (I'm now 48), you are overthinking it.

Of course, starting something completely new is always unnerving, it's natural to feel like this but honestly, the 'fit' regulars are wrapped up in what they are doing and concentrating on their thing.

Just go and if you're not sure ask, yes, some people may not help but most won't want to see you stuck, struggling and at risk of hurting yourself and will not mind helping if you ask.

We all had to start somewhere.

Lampzade · 28/09/2023 08:45

Tbh Op most people are too busy thinking about themselves to be bothered about what anyone else looks like
You have a goal in mind, don’t let anyone or anything prevent you from doing something that will benefit you.
You are still young and have many healthy years ahead. Go for it

Pinkvici22 · 28/09/2023 08:48

I was in the same boat as you in January, early 40s haven’t been to a gym in years, was feeling very intimidated.

I’ve been going 3-7 times a week since I started.

my top tips would be to try classes (you’re bound to like something) and get a PT - that’s what’s given me confidence.

Its a real mixed gym where I go - all ages, shapes and sizes - people wear what they want and it’s a really friendly place!

Good luck!

Glassback1 · 28/09/2023 08:48

Firstly! Do not overdo it!
You will get disheartened and quit very quickly!
You should start slowly with small achievements in mind.
This is a lifestyle change and you should build up slowly, but with determination and most of all " fun " !
Picture in your mind where you want this to take you in life? Small but progressive steps.

I wish you all the luck 🙏
GLASSBACK1

WrylyAmused · 28/09/2023 08:55

Some gyms have a nice vibe (mine, no one talks, but there's a huge range of ages, sizes, plenty of women in modest Muslim dress getting their workouts just as much as there are "stereotypical gym users", and plenty of smiles-in-passing).

Mostly everyone's just focused on their own workouts, which is a good thing to remember if you're self-conscious! If I ever think anything about someone in the gym who looks new, it's pretty much just "good for them".

Some gyms have a competitive, testosterone-heavy "bro" vibe, or an Insta "look at me" vibe - I'd avoid those ones, so looking round before you buy a membership is helpful.

If you've got money for a personal trainer, that can help keep motivation and build confidence in using the kit, but if not, something like PureGym is cheap and their app has loads of different workouts you can follow to learn, or there are a million people on YouTube etc with workout suggestions.

Weights are great - you won't bulk up without really heavy focus on doing so, but it helps with bone density as we age, and muscle burns more calories and has better shape than fat, so you'll look more toned and feel better, plus it can create muscle which supports joints, so can e.g. reduce back pain - but it's important to do lifts with the right form to avoid injury.

Bit of cardio and flexibility and balance work as well covers the main areas you need to hit to keep healthy as you age.

If you want to lose weight though, that's pretty much all via diet, but I find gym has huge benefits for how I feel about myself, endorphins are good for boosting and maintaining better mood, and I know I'm setting myself up for a healthier future. Higher protein for feeling full longer and low carb works for me, but fine what suits you.

Lastly - you most likely won't feel "new & nervous" for long! Few weeks of sustained effort and it'll be another thing within your comfort zone, so you'll be able to congratulate yourself both for doing it, and for expanding your confidence and your world a bit.
Good luck!

CastleGoddess · 28/09/2023 08:56

I agree that most people are too busy thinking about themselves to be bothered about others. However, I think it's more of a confidence issue. As @nadine90 mentioned, I was also considering starting at my local leisure center. Perhaps due to a mixture of age groups, it might be less daunting for me

OP posts:
SnacksToTheMax · 28/09/2023 09:17

I was you at the start of this year! I joined the local council-run gym and was pleasantly surprised at how non-posey and down-to-earth it is - huge mix of ages and fitness levels, with everyone just minding their own business. Lots of people nipping in before work (like me), lots of elderly people working with trainers. I really like it! I started with a 60min induction session where a trainer talked me through all the equipment (I was totally clueless) and suggested a well-balanced set of activities. I’m self-employed so tend to go at quieter times - 9/10ish is often good.

When I first turned up I felt quite self-conscious in my gym gear, but honestly, seeing everyone else just getting on with things soon helped me to relax. Occasionally, there are people around who are in extremely good shape, but I look at them now and think about how much time they must spend just on fitness, and it weirdly makes me feel better about my own fairly normal physique. I’m there to improve my general health, rather than trying to sculpt the perfect body, and I’m totally ok with that!!

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