To hate public transport

[MarySmit]

I have been assaulted three times taking the tube. Twice sexually assaulted: groped while between stations. Once I was under 16 wearing a school uniform (so no doubt about my age) and once pregnant. Both times I couldn't move away, not felt able to speak up for myself due to feeling vulnerable.

Another time I was physically assaulted (completely unprovoked). I was also pregnant at the time. The woman, when challenged, said she didn't realise I was pregnant when she assaulted me.

Other times I have been verbally abused on the bus, for no reason other than trying to board with a buggy (there was room).

It shouldn't be this dangerous, but it is.

Have others experienced similar?

I haven’t thank goodness no

and that’s living I. London for 15 years and having a baby / toddler

That's great for you. There was a recent police campaign to raise awareness, so it's not uncommon.

I haven't as well. Sorry about your experiences.

Not me, but my friend once got off a very sardine crowded tube in London where she’d had to stand, to find a man had jizzed on her coat.

Never had a problem on the tube. Odd people have chatted to me on the bus . When I was a teen I had more issues in the street than o public transport. I can see why your experiences would make you hate it.

I've been shouted at and I suppose verbally abused on public transport plenty of times (in London, in Ireland where I'm from and in Paris - the worst). In most cases the person being abusive was either drunk or mentally ill.

I've been mugged at knifepoint in Paddington station, felt up a few times but always felt comfortable to shout "Aargh! Fuck off!", and on one occasion had my feet puked on.

However when driving I've been crashed into twice (had one car written off) and the closest I have been to death was on a motorway when the bottom fell out of the car in front of me at 70mph. So I still think public transport is safer - also I've been using public transport every day for decades so the vast majority of journeys have been fine.

Although I hear there are bedbugs on the Victoria line now

I've had a lot more hassle on the streets of London than I ever have on the tube or bus.

I change my stance, use my elbow and/or bag where needed to stop people pressing against me when standing on crowded trains. I'm quite happy to also give a death stare for creepy carry on/inappropriate pressing against me that makes me uncomfortable. If needed I'd add a sharp 'could you move a bit please' to those creeps who have ignored other cues or persisted despite the above. The creeps know they've been rumbled and usually back down when challenged. I move seats, or carriages at train stations if I've, for whatever reason, attracted the unwanted attention of people who target passengers unknown to them.

I have also helped out other women, who'd frozen when being harassed by usually male strangers, by making eye contact with the women & gesturing to them to come and sit beside me.

I sometimes ask people with a backpack on their back that pushing me off balance if they can move it, a lot of the time people don't realise that their bags are pushing against people. I say excuse me when sitting down while placing my feet to claim my space with (mostly) men who leg spread. I use my bag at the arm rest of it's been hogged and the other person's elbow is in my ribs. I use ear plugs or headphones to avoid listening to their noise on their phones. While traveling I generally read, do crosswords and listen to downloaded podcasts.

I've been followed through a station before and it's one of the only times I felt truly scared. I lost him eventually but it's made me watchful.

Generally, my journeys are uneventful, I think because of my boundaries, and strategies to deal with unwanted touching and nuisance noise avoidance.

This made me feel sick . What the fuck is wrong with some men . Probably someone you wouldn't think would do it too.

I hate it too. It's rural where I live and a car is a must. When people complain about the lack of public transport here, I make noises in agreement, but I'm secretly happy that it isnt a option. I would like it for the younger generation, if it was done well. This being Englan though, it rarely is!

Never and lived in London for years. Much prefer it to driving - it’s statistically much safer.

YANBU, public transport is disgusting.
Firstly due to it not being at all reliable, with buses and trains not turning up, disappearing from the live tracking when they're due to arrive, being delayed for no good reason. Which then means that the next one is jam-packed, and sometimes won't allow anymore people on, so you're waiting even longer.
Then secondly for the amount of rowdy, vile people you'll find on there.

For me it's either £2.50 for the bus, or £5.50 for an Uber, and I have to go with the Uber. But I appreciate that the bus or train is the most cost effective option for many, especially for longer journeys so it's their only choice.

The only bad experience I ever had was aeons ago, on a train (broad daytime) when a bloke sitting opposite tried to chat me up - I was polite for a minute or two but then told him I was tired and pretended to go to sleep.

I ‘woke’ just as we were pulling into my station - to find him in the final stage of wanking all over my shoes! New shoes! 🤮
Obv. I had to bin them. Was so bloody mad. And I suppose shocked, but TBH not traumatised at all.
There were people sitting across the aisle, inc. two girls who got off when I did, and I did ask them, but they hadn’t noticed anything. They were equally appalled though, offered to do anything, inc. a lift from their dad who was waiting for them.

Nothing since then*, and I use public transport a lot, mostly buses.
*Except an old man absolutely stinking of wee sitting in the seat right in front of me, but he didn’t actually do anything, poor old bugger.

Never had a problem on trains, subway or buses around here. Match days are a pain but that’s always just been rowdy and there’s plenty of police/security presence.

I had a really creepy man bothering me on a train years ago. I hid in the toilet for 10 mins and then moved along 4 carriages, deliberately putting myself into a seat where there were people packed around me. The creepy shit bag searched the train for me and and come and stood and said I’ve been looking for you. I prefer not to take public transport in this country. I’ve had much better experiences in Germany on public transport.

I've experienced antisocial behaviour on the Tube. Aggressive men fighting, aggressive men on drugs etc. I've occasionally been scared on the Tube.

Fortunately, despite living in London my whole life and using the Tube daily (until Covid changed my working pattern), I haven't been sexually assaulted on the Tube. Possibly because most of my travelling is during Rush Hour and when I am out in the evening I am usually with other people, which may make me less likely to be a target.

I have experienced some abusive language when walking down the street, however. These incidents have been fairly rare.

Thankfully not, and I'd put it down to the public rather than the public transport. In fact I'm more on edge waiting for a bus then being on one. Night buses have always felt like risky places, but generally by doing the London thing of ignoring everyone, I've kept my head down and not had any trouble in 30 years. Sorry that you have though. It's men though mainly isn't it - not your physical assault woman, that's more unusual, but pervs can strike anywhere.

Omg yes! The only time I’ve ever had issues with anyone is on the bus! People on the bus are so weird.

I’m surprised so many say it hasn’t happened to them it’s a regular occurrence where I am (also London) the other day I was at a bus stop and a man arrived me and my children were there first when the bus came he screamed at me “you’re welcome” as I went to board before him?! Err we was there first (no he was not elderly or visibly disabled) he continued his rant towards me on the bus about how in THIS country we treat people with respect (I’m English so no idea why he felt the need for that comment)

I remember as a teenager I was alone on the bus with the driver, he refused to open the doors and chatted me up. Well I can't actually remember what he said tbh, but he was somewhat odd. I was a pretty immature for my age teenager, probably about 15/16.I imagine I just looked like a rabbit in the headlights. Thankfully nothing else happened and he let me off.

Have had very many deeply dodgy taxi drivers ick.

That’s awful, so sorry that happened to you.

lived here coming up 13 years and nothing.

Only a bit of unwanted staring but that’s mostly been men from other cultures where women may be a bit more coveted up etc.

I don’t think those men particularly mean harm.

What is it about English public transport though for so many to have so many negative experiences? I've been on public transport in Taiwan, Norway, Singapore (6 months living in Norway and 6 in Singapore so not a short touristy stint either) and my experiences with public transport in those places were overwhelmingly positive. Clean, punctual, efficient with polite people who mostly mind their own business.

I do feel sorry for people who clean buses, have seen a few people who have passed out and pissed themselves..

I don't think it's just the UK tomatoandeggs, have heard horror stories about greyhound buses in USA for example.

Nothing close to what you’ve experienced. I’ve been using public transport alone since I was 14, never had a drivers license, and riding buses, ferries, trains in eight different countries (US, UK, and Europe) including 10+ hour train rides. I’ve had maybe one or two incidents in 20 years. I honestly feel safer on public transport than I do in a car due to various negative experiences as a passenger and as a pedestrian so I can understand you feeling the opposite. Tbh, I’ve had more issues with dealing with rude staff than fellow riders.