To ask if DS is invited to the party

[ER1992]

A friend of mine DD is having a birthday party in a couple of weeks. My friend told me a while back I'm conversation that she'd booked the party and when and where it was, etc, but didn't follow up with a 'let me know if your DS can come'
(Our children are both also friends, and her DD is invited to my DS party the week before) .
My friend has since spoken about the party in conversations but has never asked if DS is coming or confirmed his invite.
I'm now unsure as the date is getting closer if my DS is invited or not. I wouldn't be offended if he isn't as I know that numbers can be restrictive, but I don't want to not turn up with him if she's expecting him there and vice versa.
Should I ask, and if so, how? Or is it better to just leave it, not go, and if/when she asks why we weren't there, I then explain that I wasn't sure if DS had been invited.

Imo better not to go & let her ask the question.

Next time she mentions it say. Wow bet you have been busy, I hope you all have a nice time there. And see how she responds

"Are you telling me all these details about the party because DS is invited? Bit weird if not - and if not, then stop telling me because why would I give a shit?"

She's a friend right? Say everything you have just written to her and have a conversation.

"I totally understand if he's not invited, but I wasn't sure whether you giving me the full details was an invite?"

I would think he isn't because surely she would have asked you if you can come? There isn't any assumption because how would she know if you are available or not. A weird one though if she's talking about it, maybe rather ask.

If she is your friend then just ask her.

Just as you've said here - you've mentioned the party and I just wanted to check whether you told me because DS is invited but he's fine if he's not.

It does seem weird to tell you all of the details if DS isn’t invited. I would say ‘My memory is terrible and I know you told me about DDs party but I can’t remember if you’ve invited DS, no worries if not, I just wouldn’t want to forget’.