Is cheating less bad in a long distance relationship?

[Changethechannels]

I don't actually have an opinion either way but I was reading an infidelity thread and this question came into my mind.

What do people think?

No I don't think it's less bad. I think if you can't handle a long distance relationship and it's too hard for you then don't be in one

Playing devils advocate here: cheating in a long distance relationship is presumably cheating to get needs met (sex, company, affection, day to day emotional and intellectual exchange) that your partner can't currently meet because they're not physically there.

does that change the meaning of the cheating?

No it doesn't change the meaning of cheating.

People in live-in relationships cheat to get those needs met too.

No, cheating means you are unfaithful to someone you promised fidelity too. That's it. It isn't related to getting needs met or not. If your needs aren't met, then end the relationship and find someone who fulfills those needs.

No! If you've promised to be faithful to someone it doesn't matter how far away they live. Sex is not a need. If you can't manage without then don't enter into a long distance relationship.

I went backpacking for six months when my husband and I were dating. It never occurred to me to cheat. If your relationship needs you to be together all the time to keep you faithful there's not really much of a relationship there IMO.

Not to me it doesn't. Where do you draw the line , if say your partner is away on business for a week and you fancy a cuddle.

I don’t think it’s less bad from a moral or emotional perspective. Cheating is cheating and if you are committed to someone it should be irrelevant whether you see them once a week or twice a year.

But I think it’s more understandable that this happens if you see someone rarely.

It’s horses for courses but I don’t really see the point of being in a committed relationship with someone you see so rarely. It’s more grief than the output justifies unless it’s for a short period.

Not at all imo. If you've entered into a monogamous relationship, distance makes no difference to behaviour parameters unless otherwise agreed imo. You have accepted that certain needs (namely physical) may not be met as often as they usually would by a partner closer by, indeed if ever before a certain point/life change is possible, but that doesn't make it "less bad" to go and get those needs met by someone outside the relationship.

It doesn’t matter how far apart you are.
Cheating is cheating.

Cheating is cheating. No one is forced to be in a long distance relationship, if it isn't for them then they need to end it, not cheat.

Cheating is cheating and shows a lack of integrity, long distance relationship or not.
Cheaters usually go on to cheat again and everyone knows apart from poor naive sod who's stuck with them. Cheating is a clear message indicating "I don't respect you or our relationship" , if you forgive a cheater they will respect you even less.

No it doesn't. If you can't cope without those things on a daily basis, don't have a long distance relationship.

No but its possibly more likely

Eh? It’s exactly the same, the distance makes no difference whatsoever. Do you mean are people in long distance relationships more likely to cheat?

Cheating is still cheating regarding how far away you are from your partner?!!? What type of question is this, it’s common sense.

Well if you have a partner and they're at home in bed and you go out of your way to tell then you're working late to go and be in bed with someone else, then i think that's about wanting someone else.

Whereas if your partner isn't there and you're lonely and just want someone, then I think it's less about wanting someone else?

Morally...i think I agree its just as bad. I'm just wondering if it's a lot more understandable.

I think it is more understandable that long distance relationships fail because people discover people they fancy closer to where they are. But it is still cheating and it isn't any more acceptable or less lacking in respect for their partner. Being understandable or not doesn't really come into it.

I can't imagine being with my partner and fancying someone else or going to lengths to sneak around to spend time with someone else.

But I can imagine being seperated by distance from my partner for months on end, getting carried away one night due to loneliness/ drink and bonding with others due to the circumstances.

Am I unusual then?

No, cheating is cheating.

I couldn't speak to whether this makes you "unusual" per se. What I can say is that, along with run of the mill "local" relationships, I have been in varying-distance relationships that have each lasted at least two years in that circumstance (one ~5 hours away by car, one a couple of hours on the train, and another on a completely different continent), and not in a single one did I personally feel any more inclined or liable to cheat due to that distance and lack of physical proximity, not even the lattermost, where I was lucky to physically see the person more than twice in the same year. Perhaps I'm usual here but I don't believe anything about it makes an action more understandable - rather, the urge might be more understandable being far apart for long periods, but I'd still question the integrity of the relationship even then for the desire to cheat having been felt to begin with.

perhaps I'm unusual, sorry! 😂

No, you are not unusual. But it is still cheating. There isn't a scenario where cheating stops being cheating. It might be common, it might be unsurprising, it might be the catalyst to end a dead relationship, but if you are being unfaithful to someone you are in a monogamous relation with, then you are cheating.

If you can't cope with a long distance relationship and what it entails like less frequent sex... you shouldn't be in one.