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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Benefits reduction

1000 replies

Bonsaitreepic · 22/09/2023 08:49

I got my UC payment today. Just checked and it’s almost £300 less than usual. This is because my oldest is now classed as an adult as he’s left ft education. He’s not currently in work.
I have 3 other children but now I seemingly only get support for 2 of them due to the child cap.
Im freaking out. I only get maintenance for one of the children as I have the other 2 50/50 with their dad. I cannot afford to lose this much money every month. I was already struggling as it was. I’m unable to work just yet as one of the children has complex needs. I already get some DLA for them.
im quite sure there’s nothing I can do about this but I’m so worried

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
Strawberrycake3725 · 23/09/2023 20:01

If your son is now an adult, he can open his own UC claim and start chipping in for he costs he incurs in the house like food and utilities, sit him down and explain the situation hopefully he’ll get it

VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia · 23/09/2023 20:04

yogasaurus · 22/09/2023 10:00

People who work. Like the OP’s son should.

There will be fewer working age people when we retire to pay taxes and our state pensions because of the falling birth rate, which is encouraged to fall by removing CB from third+ children. Today's children are tomorrow's tax payers.

Rosscameasdoody · 23/09/2023 20:06

Babyroobs · 23/09/2023 19:56

It really is a good suggestion. If op's son can't find work he should help out with the disabled child, unless of course their are therapies which the child needs that only mum can do. Whichever one can find a job even part time should do so to boost household income. On Uc op could earn up to £139 a week if on carers alowance or up to £379 a month on Uc without losing any benefits. This would more than make up the shortfall.

If she doesn’t claim carers allowance directly (which would be deducted in full from UC) there is no earnings cap on the carers element of UC. But there’s a drawback in that NI contributions are better with CA than with UC.

Rosscameasdoody · 23/09/2023 20:09

Princessandthepea0 · 23/09/2023 19:59

They haven’t though. There are many, many examples on this thread of posters with complex needs themselves - as well as their children - who work.

Which may not be the same as the OP’s circumstances.

BarbieButt · 23/09/2023 20:10

I thought young people can't just leave school without going into further education or an apprenticeship?

sloanypony66 · 23/09/2023 20:11

This exactly, you’ve stopped getting £300 but they’re giving him £250 so UC still being paid out for him. You should take more from him.

MistressoftheDarkSide · 23/09/2023 20:11

Everything else aside, can I just point out that the hand wringing over hard working tax payers is laughable because every single thing you buy is taxed multiple times - it’s not just income tax that greases the wheels.

Producers of widgets pay tax to produce the widgets, the sellers of widgets pay tax when they buy the widgets. The purchasers of widgets pay tax when they buy them. Same for services. If those on low income can’t afford to buy widgets then businesses go under and more tax revenue is lost.

Some benefits are taxable, so the state claws back a portion of that money.

A quick Google around how much tax revenue across the board the government takes will show you their own figures.

While the OPs son would ideally be getting a job, it doesn’t immediately solve the problem of the OP, unable to work, struggling to maintain her financial commitments.

I’ve banged on about this before on MN - an example - family gets evicted due to rent arrears. Say rent is 1000? a month. Family is placed in temporary accommodation, state funded. Maybe one room. Can be 1000 a week or more depending on area. Shared facilities, probably inadequate for providing regular nutritious meals. Maybe said accommodation is located a significant distance from school, any job, support network. Travel costs go up, health goes down, mental health deteriorates, kids underachieve at school, kids fall in with wrong crowd, family relationships suffer. Interventions from services are required. It all costs public money.

It would be cheaper for the government and the tax payer to just stump up the 1000 a month to ensure stability and a better chance of progress for the family, no? Am I wrong?

The old metric of “work or starve” cannot be applied to the rapidly changing face of the modern job market. 100% employment is impossible, even for those capable of work. And it isn’t economically desirable according to the market. Equality of opportunity does not exist. Nepotism, connections, preferences for more and more qualifications for jobs that used to be learned “on the job”, zero hours contracts, technology and AI are going to see far more people having problems sooner than we think and it will affect a good proportion of the hand wringing hard working tax payers than we realise.

Also poverty creates an industry of its own. If everyone was able to go out and provide themselves a good standard of living, a chunk of the economy would collapse.

The zero sum race to the bottom mentality on threads like this is astonishing. I’m sure the OP would like nothing better than to improve her circumstances but right now she’s caring for a disabled child, probably being mindful of her 18 year olds well being and wondering how best to support him in a myriad of ways to indeed better himself / contribute meaningfully to her household and society. I mean, 200 a month is hardly living high on the hog territory for an 18 year old. It’s probably less than a “hard working” MP spends on lunch in a heavily subsidised (by the tax payer) HoC restaurant. Oh yeah, the hallowed HoC where stories are published of drug residue found in the bathrooms….

Yes I’m ranting. I’m ranting because I’m sick of seeing people fall over themselves to punish and denigrate others for the crime of having little or no money, regardless of the barriers that stop them being resilient and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps.

For those on low income, keeping themselves and their children relatively stable, one or two unforeseen problems can tip them into a hole that is sometimes impossible to get out of - illness, bereavement, disability etc. And it could be any one of us at the bottom of the pile in any given moment.

Hats off to those who have clawed their way out though, regardless of the cost to relationships, mental health etc - I mean that sincerely. But not everyone can do that. Should they live in misery and shame? It appears some people think so.

happyinherts · 23/09/2023 20:11

I thought young people can't just leave school without going into further education or an apprenticeship?

I think that's 16 year olds. The OP's son is 18.

Rosscameasdoody · 23/09/2023 20:13

Babyroobs · 23/09/2023 20:01

If you paid into the system for 20 years you would have at least qualified for contributions based JSA ?

If she received pay in lieu of notice JSA wouldn’t have been payable until that was exhausted.

ruby1957 · 23/09/2023 20:14

VitoCorleoneOfMNMafia · 23/09/2023 20:04

There will be fewer working age people when we retire to pay taxes and our state pensions because of the falling birth rate, which is encouraged to fall by removing CB from third+ children. Today's children are tomorrow's tax payers.

CB - Child benefit is paid for all children - no restriction to 2.
It is only when someone is claiming benefits for children - either child tax credits or on UC that the cap is set at 2.

OvertakenByLego · 23/09/2023 20:14

Rosscameasdoody · 23/09/2023 20:09

Which may not be the same as the OP’s circumstances.

Exactly this. Just because some people can, doesn’t mean everyone is able to. And the OP stated she is unable to work at the moment.

Salma80 · 23/09/2023 20:15

Please get him to take a look at some apprenticeships. They're great for learning and earning!

Babyroobs · 23/09/2023 20:16

Salma80 · 23/09/2023 20:15

Please get him to take a look at some apprenticeships. They're great for learning and earning!

Completely agree with this. My son that has done an apprenticeship has done so well, way better then the one who went to UNi. Some apprenticeships are amazing.

Rosscameasdoody · 23/09/2023 20:16

MistressoftheDarkSide · 23/09/2023 20:11

Everything else aside, can I just point out that the hand wringing over hard working tax payers is laughable because every single thing you buy is taxed multiple times - it’s not just income tax that greases the wheels.

Producers of widgets pay tax to produce the widgets, the sellers of widgets pay tax when they buy the widgets. The purchasers of widgets pay tax when they buy them. Same for services. If those on low income can’t afford to buy widgets then businesses go under and more tax revenue is lost.

Some benefits are taxable, so the state claws back a portion of that money.

A quick Google around how much tax revenue across the board the government takes will show you their own figures.

While the OPs son would ideally be getting a job, it doesn’t immediately solve the problem of the OP, unable to work, struggling to maintain her financial commitments.

I’ve banged on about this before on MN - an example - family gets evicted due to rent arrears. Say rent is 1000? a month. Family is placed in temporary accommodation, state funded. Maybe one room. Can be 1000 a week or more depending on area. Shared facilities, probably inadequate for providing regular nutritious meals. Maybe said accommodation is located a significant distance from school, any job, support network. Travel costs go up, health goes down, mental health deteriorates, kids underachieve at school, kids fall in with wrong crowd, family relationships suffer. Interventions from services are required. It all costs public money.

It would be cheaper for the government and the tax payer to just stump up the 1000 a month to ensure stability and a better chance of progress for the family, no? Am I wrong?

The old metric of “work or starve” cannot be applied to the rapidly changing face of the modern job market. 100% employment is impossible, even for those capable of work. And it isn’t economically desirable according to the market. Equality of opportunity does not exist. Nepotism, connections, preferences for more and more qualifications for jobs that used to be learned “on the job”, zero hours contracts, technology and AI are going to see far more people having problems sooner than we think and it will affect a good proportion of the hand wringing hard working tax payers than we realise.

Also poverty creates an industry of its own. If everyone was able to go out and provide themselves a good standard of living, a chunk of the economy would collapse.

The zero sum race to the bottom mentality on threads like this is astonishing. I’m sure the OP would like nothing better than to improve her circumstances but right now she’s caring for a disabled child, probably being mindful of her 18 year olds well being and wondering how best to support him in a myriad of ways to indeed better himself / contribute meaningfully to her household and society. I mean, 200 a month is hardly living high on the hog territory for an 18 year old. It’s probably less than a “hard working” MP spends on lunch in a heavily subsidised (by the tax payer) HoC restaurant. Oh yeah, the hallowed HoC where stories are published of drug residue found in the bathrooms….

Yes I’m ranting. I’m ranting because I’m sick of seeing people fall over themselves to punish and denigrate others for the crime of having little or no money, regardless of the barriers that stop them being resilient and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps.

For those on low income, keeping themselves and their children relatively stable, one or two unforeseen problems can tip them into a hole that is sometimes impossible to get out of - illness, bereavement, disability etc. And it could be any one of us at the bottom of the pile in any given moment.

Hats off to those who have clawed their way out though, regardless of the cost to relationships, mental health etc - I mean that sincerely. But not everyone can do that. Should they live in misery and shame? It appears some people think so.

👏👏👏.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 23/09/2023 20:22

It would appear that the optimal solution would for him to get a job and start paying room and board.

An alternative solution is that he becomes a career to the disabled child (claiming allowance) and OP gets a job.

The first one is the quick solution the second would be the longer term solution. While he’s a carer she’s getting experience and a work history. He can still work when she’s available. He can also look at uni part time or other training for his future.

Regardless of the current situation the OP needs a long term strategy. Child benefits is clearly not the long term solution.

Salma80 · 23/09/2023 20:22

https://www.apprenticeships.gov.uk/apprentices/browse-apprenticeships#

Here is a link to search for an apprenticeship. They are not what they used to be. You can even get an apprenticeship to become a solicitor nowadays. I do hope things improve for you and maybe you can get some advice from a benefits advicr website like turn2us. The cuts shouldn't apply to those in positions like yourself.

Browse apprenticeships before you apply

https://www.apprenticeships.gov.uk/apprentices/browse-apprenticeships#

bananaxapple · 23/09/2023 20:30

MaPaSpa · 23/09/2023 09:25

If it was a few years then the phone should be paid off and he can move to sim only and pay it himself.

o2 have unlimited calls and 30gb for £8 a month.

take £75-100 for costs from him and get him signed with a jobs agency if he’s still having trouble getting work.

Edited

Where is this o2 offer please? 😂 looked on website and couldn’t see it. @MaPaSpa

myfaceismyown · 23/09/2023 20:33

PinkMoscatoLover · 23/09/2023 19:20

Surprise surprise this thread is nearly a 1K comments already. Look at all these people frothing at the mouth whenever they see anything benefits related. Yawn

A lot of the posts show empathy and are instructive. Why else would the OP ask for advice? "frothing at the mouth" or actually trying to help. Your call.

PinkMoscatoLover · 23/09/2023 20:38

myfaceismyown · 23/09/2023 20:33

A lot of the posts show empathy and are instructive. Why else would the OP ask for advice? "frothing at the mouth" or actually trying to help. Your call.

If you’ve read all of the comments and you conclude that a lot of posts are showing empathy then you’re mad. Yes some people are ofc being nice. Many are not. Your call. Cya!

Insertcreativenamehere · 23/09/2023 20:39

You get your eldest to get a job.

myfaceismyown · 23/09/2023 20:42

@Rosscameasdoody Yes we do have to pay taxes on income and it does reduce the hand outs but that was my point. When you can pay your own way you have pride. The OP made a point of saying she does not want to take from the system. She is obviously in a very low place, and I most sincerely wish her well. Anyone who wants to make something of themselves is to be admired.

Yourcatisnotsorry · 23/09/2023 20:43

Is your child with complex needs not in school or entitled to 30 hours childcare like nearly all other children? Get a job and perhaps you’ll inspire your son to want better for himself too.

80skid · 23/09/2023 20:46

Obviously the son being working and/or providing evening childcare for OP to work also are the best solutions, followed by UC paying for living costs rather than pocket money.

I am struck, however, that the son's father's parental responsibilities end when son is 18, whereas the parent who provides a home and has done presumably for his whole, continues until he is able to support himself. It properly sucks that the parent who hangs around struggles. In an ideal world, dad would be offering help but sadly it doesn't seem that is the case.

myfaceismyown · 23/09/2023 20:49

@PinkMoscatoLover your childish post shows no empathy to the OP

OvertakenByLego · 23/09/2023 20:49

Yourcatisnotsorry · 23/09/2023 20:43

Is your child with complex needs not in school or entitled to 30 hours childcare like nearly all other children? Get a job and perhaps you’ll inspire your son to want better for himself too.

Maybe not, there are many, many DC with SEN not in full-time school. OP says she cannot work right now, even the government recognise many carers can’t work.

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