some background story, i live with my in laws due to cultural reasons and its what’s expected. my first child is my in laws first grandchild however when she born i was breastfeeding. in laws kept telling me to stop and give bottle because she was crying all the time. they said it wasn’t enough for her and i’m basically starving my baby when really she had loads of trapped wind. guests used to come over which obviously they can, it’s their house but MIL used to come up to me and say so and so is here and they want to see the baby, im taking her down. bearing in mind she is sleeping but she didn’t care and other times when im breastfeeding she would take her off and go and show people who have turned up at the house. yes it’s their house but that’s my baby which has nothing to do with these guests that i have never seen before in my life so why do they want to see my baby and hold her! my point to all this is that they are very very overbearing. when it came to feeding her they would wade in and try her with anything. they wouldn’t ask me- her mother, they would do as they please. id be holding her and spending time with her and SIL would come in and take her off me. every single time i finished breastfeeding her and went downstairs so she could play. every. single. time. my SIL would grab her as soon as i set foot in the door like what the fuck. that’s my daughter not yours. so fast forward to now. i’ve recently given birth to my second child. still in same living situation because of cultural reasons but now had firm word with husband that we need our own place even if others are not happy about it! when i was pregnant with second my MIL used to say when second one is here then i’ll take your first and look after her. SIL said she can sleep with me. i always said no and left it as that. now second baby is here my MIL has taken over and literally taken my first daughter. it’s been 4 weeks and i swear to you i haven’t spent any time with her. whenever i’m in one room they are in the other. i can hear her laughing and playing with everyone but me. MIL feeds her and is basically doing what i should be doing and she is constantly with her that she always wants to be picked up by her. when she comes to me and i look after her for two minutes i hear them all come in too even thought they’ve spent the whole day with her. i cant even have two minutes with my daughter without anyone trying to take her. i feel like an awful mum because i did everything for her before second baby was here and i wanted to now too but MIL and SIL keep taking her. if im holding her and MIL walks in she cries to go to her. that’s how much she’s spending time with her that she would rather go there. my postnatal depression is not helping the situation as i feel worse than i already did by letting this happen and not have my daughter to myself. she’s probably wondering why her mum isn’t there like before. it honesty breaks me and i’m in tears everyday wondering how i’m coping. FIL keeps telling me to rest and let us look after my first daughter which i don’t understand. my in laws have been doing the most and obsessing over her, taking her away from me that i literally don’t see her yet FIL is still saying i need to let them look after my daughter more? do they literally not want me to see her at all?? because i’ve got a second baby?? mums look after two kids all the time so that’s no excuse.