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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to not want the promotion?

5 replies

LuLu345678 · 19/09/2023 21:18

I am a lawyer and have been with my firm 5 years. I am being encouraged to apply for a promotion at the moment. This would involve doing some formal supervision of juniors and additional business development activities and an interview over the next few months to even be formally considered.
Then, assuming I got the promotion I would need to supervise juniors going forwards, be much more involved with clients and business development, attend management meetings ect.
I have a reasonably high chargeable hours and billing target as it is and so I already do unpaid overtime just to hit expected utilisation (as many solicitors do). I would say I work around 45-50 hours per week. My target would not be adjusted to compensate for all the extra (non-chargeable) work that comes with the promotion, so essentially the supervision, business development and management work would largely be done in my own time. I would be looking at maybe a 55-60 hour week after promotion.
I wouldn’t mind this so much if the promotion came with a pay rise, reduction in target to allow for non-chargeable work etc. But all I would get would be an extra 1% into my pension, which I would also have to match! There used to be more benefits to the role but these have been eroded over time.
It’s not a role I feel particular passionate about any more, the content of the work and the system we work in can be demoralising.
I really don’t want to apply for this promotion as it essentially seems like a lot more work for no benefit. I think I would become resentful.
It’s strange as people do apply for this promotion year on year and seem happy to do so. I can understand if you ultimately want to make partner, this step would be a necessary evil, but that’s not what I want.
I don’t have any close friends at work, it’s not really that sort of place unfortunately (some people refuse to even respond to good morning from most other members of staff) 😂
There have been others who have not sought the promotion but those are the women with kids and who work part-time. I am single and have no kids. But I would like to meet someone and have kids in the next say 4-5 years. Regardless of this though I just don’t want my life to be about work and I’m not passionate about it. It’s a means to an end. Even if I didn’t end up having kids, a life that revolves around work is not what I want.

Does anyone have any advice for delicately turning down this ‘opportunity’? It’s quite a political environment, where I don’t really feel like I have any allies so I don’t want to be ‘turned on’ by the partners if I turn this down. I could just be overthinking it though.

Thank you for reading!

OP posts:
Octavia64 · 19/09/2023 21:27

Possibly you have an elderly mother/father who is going to need some care (not too much care) over the next year or so?

Family reasons are always good for this kind of case.

Daffidale · 19/09/2023 21:31

If you’ve no interest in being promoted further (eg partner track) then I wouldn’t. It doesn’t sound like there is anything in it for you, and it comes with a lot of downside.

You’d be better putting the extra time and energy it would take into finding work you will enjoy more somewhere else

Can you just not apply?

I guess the worry would be that if someone queries it you need to give them some version of the “not looking to progress” answer, which might lead to them thinking you aren’t commited, which in some workplaces could lead to you being quietly “managed out”. However the fact you have colleagues who haven’t gone for it makes me think it’s not somewhere with a culture where they expect people to either progress or leave.

Purplewarrior · 19/09/2023 21:48

Gosh no. You sound very sensible to me OP.

Totalwasteofpaper · 19/09/2023 22:05

Noooo

In my world...You have to pay to play

but all I would get would be an extra 1% into my pension, which I would also have to match!

derisory and laughable in equal measure.

Personally I would see this as a sign. You have no future here.
Either take on a similar role now but at a different company for at least a £25k pay rise.
OR
Go in house somewhere for a nice 9-5 and focus on meeting someone if that's what you want.

I went for the first option and pushed on hard with my career before I met my DH and had kids. When I did I was financially comfortable which wa important to me. I don't regret it at all.
My friend took the second option she really wanted to meet someone. She finally freed up time and managed to meet someone. She had a baby and is very happy too.

Tldr: Work out what you want and go from there.

LuLu345678 · 20/09/2023 14:02

Thanks all for your responses. I agree it would be a good idea for me to not apply and to look for another job!

OP posts:
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