So I apologise but the last time I posted in AIBU I got a lot of responses so I'm cheekily going back to this category, as I'm also not sure whether to post in being a parent or SEN.
So my 4 year old, who is suspected to have autism, and who is also still in nappies due to constipation and possible autism link, has now decided he is obsessed with his Willy. A lot of my friends kids seemed to have this obsession at a younger age, whereas he's just started now.
He started reception and since he's started he is constantly touching his Willy and talking about it.
I want to find a way to explain to him that it is a private area, and to keep his Willy private but as he is still in nappies, the school are obviously assisting him with toileting changes so I'm finding it really hard to explain his Willy is private and he must not get it out in public.
Communication verbally can be difficult, he has a short attention span and doesn't always engage in conversation with me, so heavy conversations or conversations that require processing of information can be difficult for us. He has a lot of echolalia so he'll just repeat back to me the last couple of words that i say.
I want to make sure he knows he's not in trouble, but understand that his Willy is private and that we don't get our Willys out in public. I just don't know how he'll (based on our struggling verbal communication) process this information and be able to differentiate the difference between public and school and it being ok in some areas at school I.e during a nappy change but not ok for example in the playground or during class or at a shopping centre.
He will randomly shout 'my widgy is up' and put his hands down his pants and start playing with it. He'll do this even when we are out and about. The school haven't mentioned anything but he's told me he has played with it at school. I asked if other boys do and he said yes. But he's also now in a phase of 'lying' too and isn't really communicating real events all of the time or is telling me things happened 'today' when they actually happened a week ago.
Is it normal? Is my concern normal? And how do I approach this topic with a SEN child without making them feel ashamed but also understanding the time and the place must only be in certain places where it's regarding intimate care.
I've really wanted to be discreet at school with regards to him wearing nappies but he doesn't seem to understand that the majority of his peers wear pants and use the toilet so he feels he has no need to hide his nappy and I'm worried he could become a candidate for bullying too.
Maybe I'm being too overly concerned about this. I mean I always expected that somewhere along the line, having a boy would result in some awkward widgy conversations but I guess I'm just struggling having them based on our limited verbal communication.
Thank you