Do you invite/welcome/accept your tween/teen views on house decor?

[Terestialnight]

Have a nearly 13 yr old DS who has a truck load of opinions. He doesn't like our taste decoration wise - even though to peers, we're considered stylish, a mix of mid modern century, contemp and vintage.

He wants bling, I think, that's his style. It's def not muted.

Anyway, we are redoing a room, and I want to change a few paintings/prints. He hates my choices, insists we don't use them, and insists it should be a democracy. He also wants snazzier paint colour choices.

I can't bear the idea of decorating to his taste, but I also get it's his house. But you know, not his money.

But am I being unreasonable? Should he get a say?

Honestly, he can decorate his own home the way he wants, when the time comes.

It's your home and will still be your home when he leaves. Therefore, your choice.

Unless it’s their bedroom, no

If it's his room - let him have his own choice where reasonable. If it's your room or a communal area it's your choice. However you should consider whether his choice is really as horrible as you think it is (it probably is) before making your final choice.

I'd welcome and invite opinion but you get final say. He can decorate his own house with his own money when he moves out.

Let him decorate his own room, other than that, no. He can decorate a house when he owns one

Absolutely not. They can do whatever they like in their bedrooms. I am very laid back regarding decoration in there but I can shut the door and not look at it, but that's as far as it goes.

Of course he doesn’t get a say! He’s a 13 year old boy for goodness sake. Parenting is not a democracy, it’s a benign dictatorship. You let him have an inch he’ll take a mile.

Teens dictating how the house is decorated? No, ha ha aha ha!

Their room, yes (to an extent - nothing structurally dodgy or damaging obvs).

Having said that, I do ask everyone's opinion on decorating the house. (There are 7 of us living here and the age range is 8 to 85). I very rarely take any notice though 😂

Thank you for the sanity check! I needed to hear this. He's very, very persuasive, a barrister in training, so I need to catch myself and stay firm. I agree he should have a say, and I'm happy to make small compromises but no way is the room going to be yellow etc!

No. Ds has zero opinions on stuff like this but Dd does. She can have her bedroom and the spare room she uses as she wants but otherwise, no.

They get a say on their own rooms and that's it.

Unless it's his room then it is your choice. When he owns a house he can decorate it how he wants, until then: no!

No way! My 15yo ds doesn't give a monkey's about decor. 18yo dd does, and has very different taste from me, but I don't think it would even occur to her that she'd have input on how we decorate the house (except for her room)!

LOL, no, they get their opinons, they can decorate their own personal rooms to their taste, but it is not their house, although it is their home. All living spaces are decorated to our taste (with our money, they don't contribute) and they can have their opinions, keep them to themselves, and also, find motivation in wanting to decorate their house to their taste, in moving out.

It ain't no democracy.

Teens / dc can choose what happens in their bedrooms.

The rest of the house, they can decorate when they have their own house.

Absolutely not; DDs room is how she wants but my house is how I want, they can have their own houses how they want

Let him do his own room.... and ignore his "style suggestions " for the rest of the house.

My 15 year old does not get a say apart from his own bedroom. My money, my name on the house, my decision.

Of course he doesn't get a say. Who'd want to live in a house styled by a 13 year old? Especially one with a taste for bling.

I am always repainting somewhere in the house, I don’t even discuss it with my children. They come home from school, let out a sigh and say something along the lines of ‘oh you’ve been painting again’. They might comment on the colour but that’s because I can be quite bold with my choices but they’d never try and tell me how to decorate it.