Why are some people just so rude?

[ThirtyThrillionThreeTrees]

I'm just wondering what motivates it - is it stress, is it lack of awareness, selfishness, lack of education, that they build themselves up by putting others down etc?

It seems to be getting worse. Noticing it in real life and on here too - people genuinely posting here for help & just trying to do their best and some people can't wait to take a cut. I just don't understand why and just curious about the motivation.

It's a bit of everything you mentioned.

On here I think a large part of it is people using the fact they are anonymous to be horribly unpleasant in ways they wouldn't dare in real life. Just to let off steam, I think, I'm not really sure.

So many reasons, some of which you have listed. Upbringing, mental health issues, hiding behind a computer screen, fear....endless. I think it would be hard to pinpoint a universal reason.

People in cars cut me up on the road or bully their way past in ways they would never do in, say the Post Office queue.
As a society we have become much more about what we can get away with since the Thatcher years - it seems much more a case of bad behaviour not mattering if you get away with it rather than trying to be decent for the sake of others.

Always because they are unhappy in their lives.

I think a lot of people are tired of being nice and are rebelling against #bekind. And they don't see their comments as rude, more honest.

I saw a comment from a poster the other day get absolutely piled on by others for her apparent rudeness...there wasn't any that I could see. But the selfrighteous types doing the kicking were awful.

People percieve "rude" differently.

Yes to all that, but it's self-perpetuating. People see others getting away with things or being selfish, etc., so start to adopt the same kind of attitude themselves.

Entitlement

I'd also agree with this. One person's "honesty" is another person's "rude".

People just don't like being criticised etc., even if justified, so they just call it rude or even bullying.

Seems to be so much worse since the lockdowns.
I work with the public and they are breathtakingly rude and entitled every single day.
I've given up expecting people to be polite or even have manners.

More people are just, well, graceless IMO in relation to trivial events. So what if someone makes a minor mistake or holds you up for 5 seconds or doesn't give the answer you're hoping for...accept it with good grace and move on with life. Too many seem to think 'having a go' is the better way forward.

I think a lot of people just aren't very nice and hide it less now.

I also think for some people the narrative we've been sold about how to get on in life has been proven to be untrue and so people don't see the point in following the social code.

I also think there's an element of culture involved. The UK is very diverse. And what's viewed as rude/direct is very cultural.

I don't know op! It's like all the worst things about futuristic fiction is coming true - Mad Max style, say. Maybe our greed is catching up with us...

I do believe that a leader of any organisation defines that organisation - at any size, level etc. So looking at Britain, I would place the blame firmly at the 'top'.

Returning to the idea of the fiction thing, I dream of coming back one day and finding we've ended up more like Star Trek than Mad Max...

I'm not oversensitive and it's not a case of mistaking honesty for rudeness.

There are many ways to give constructive feedback, highlight negative behaviour, disappointment, dissatisfaction etc. without resorting to rudeness.

Nobody thinks they are oversensitive and seeing rudeness when its not there, they always think they are in the right.

Doesn't mean you actually are though.

@whatwasthatgrandma

I appreciate what you are saying but there isn't a perception problem and the cases I'm speaking of have been seen and heard by others too.

Have you really never noticed real rudeness or come across it on some threads here?

I agree, to me I think they just were not raised properly or taught basic manners and acceptable behaviour as children. You expect adults to know what is and isn’t acceptable regardless of how they were raised but sadly these days it’s each to their own and entitled people just don’t care about how they affect others. All we can do is raise our children well and hope the next generation get it right.

Of course I have, but rudeness is subjective. And cultural. And changeable, and inconsistent, and variable by your own mood, as much as anything.

What is rude to you won't be rude to me, and vice versa. Its ALL perception. There is no objective rudeness.

Some things are unanimously rude. Like barging into a stranger full force or calling them a rude word.

What does being white British have to do with anything? What's your agenda here?

No agenda. What are you confused by in my post? I thought it was fairly clear that it was an explanation of relativistic morals and the concept of rudeness vis a vis cultural differences et al.