AIBU to feel sorry for male comedians who are now the topic of speculation?

[CwmYoy]

Katherine Ryan says there is one.

Sara Pascoe says she knows of two.

Lucy Beaumont says at least 10.

I think they should perhaps name names rather than invite speculation. Katherine says why should she lose money so still shared the stage with one. Sara has said something similar.

Maybe they, as very, very rich female comedians, should take a lead to protect lesser known ones.

I can't watch reruns of Mock the Week or QI without a niggle of suspicion creeping in about comedians I have loved. (Not RB, obviously - turn off if he's on)

Maybe the men being speculated about could speak out and name the predators like you expect the women to.

I don’t feel sorry for anyone who should but didn’t ‘out’ a sexual predator AND those who allowed it (for example, the driver and whoever authorised the driver to pick up the young groomed girl etc etc) this behaviour is rife throughout the country and does not stop at Russell Brand!

Nope. Not one iota.

Because if they know who they are they should have dobbed them into the police, or done the "maaate" thing with them years ago. Open secret? my fanny. They just can't be arsed.

If they’ve done nothing wrong they won’t have anything to worry about will they!

@Cheesedoffwitheverything How is an employee wanting a safe workplace, somehow the 'crux' of the problem? without any of the rest of the story, this should be a fucking given! what you should have done is to make sure that everyone was well aware of this, it's called culture, values and respect in most organisations and is quite possible, without trying force someone else to share a story, which they clearly didn't want to and told you why.

I have to say there’s a lot about this witch huntery I don’t like. It’s like when Huw Edwards wasn’t named yet and speculation was rude naming men who had nothing to do with it. People saying they think it must be Rylan or Graham Norton. I can’t abide the frothy mouth rabid dog style of people itching to shout “Burn, burn witch!”. It detracts from the people we do know are predators, and it detracts from their victims.

Except for the rampant online speculation and rumour

Now here’s the crux. She never actually named who this person was. So how were we supposed to protect her?

by being more supportive, and being more reassuring that being the whistleblower wouldn't tank her career. Because we all know what happens to whistleblowing women.

Many years ago I posted on a different forum how Hardeep E Coli gave me the creeps and I got slammed for calling him that and told that he was great.

Oh yeah, really feel sorry for people who have to put up with speculation, how terrible. Much worse than sexual assault that speculation, whatever will we do to help these poor men 🙄

Popbitch has published on Hardeep Singh Kohli numerous times. Everyone knows about Walliams. Fielding, great friend of Brand 'dated' a 16 yo when he was 30. This is all common knowledge.

Why don’t the other male comedians name them? I’m sure they know too and chose not to get into it or even better intervene when they see it or confront the men. Why do other women have to do it?

What should the driver have done? He pleaded with her not to go in. But he could hardly just drive off with her in the car. If he'd called the police what would he have said "an adult is having sex with a 16 year old"? Nothing would have happened.

I called the three females I mentioned very, very rich. No one else.

Here’s the thing though, you automatically assume that the female is in the right and that a male in the office is abusing his power, based on just bits you read about online.

I hate the patriarchy, I constantly battle it. I never liked RB. Anyone who abuses their position deserves what they have coming to them but use the right channels.

How was I supposed to make the office safe for a female from a male that she wouldn’t name and where no-one had seen anything inappropriate happening?
Ultimately she got hysterical and wanted us to sack someone without naming him. How the actual fuck is a company supposed to do that?

Turns out that the chap in question she’d been seeing outwith work, he’d refused to pander to her requests for money, finished with her and she bore a grudge. Funnily enough she never told me that bit. I only found out later and that she had form for this.
Which is why the proper channels should be used with proper support, in an ideal world. It’s the 21st century but the baying mob are still willing to burn folk at the stake without the proper evidence being presented in the right way.

No, I'm sure many know of their offending colleagues but excuse it like other men.

I rarely hear of any man calling out this behaviour.

All men are culpable in this, they ALL know somebody but say nothing.

@Cheesedoffwitheverything Where does my post state that I have assumed that the female was right and the male was wrong? Both deserve a safe workplace, and the culture is formed by making sure that those values are upheld by everyone. Did you have a policy on intimate relations in the workplace? Did you use the opportunity to remind everyone of the whistle blowing policy? Did you remind staff or have an EAP in place? Did you have any open proactive discussions on workplace behaviour and conduct?

From your own update it seems that you only ever got one side of the story and that you deemed her to be the problem. Interesting choice of wording, she is ‘Hysterical’ and he is a ‘Chap’, ever looked up the etymology of the word hysterical?? It’s been used to cast aspersions on women’s behaviour since 5th century BC and still going strong.

A few years ago, I bought a job lot of 2nd hand books, and there was an annual from a TV programme in it. I'd never seen the programme. I only looked at a few pages and was disgusted to see several jokes about rape in it. I binned the book.

One of the 'celebrities' in the show has had his surname mentioned on this page, and the show was TMB.

Erm…don’t drive there…

I personally think, the people in the industry that know the names of these predators should go to the authorities.

Reading news papers and online sites, hinting that 'They know', is only making the public guess names and in some cases the wrong names.

We are now at a stage that the authorities will listen, they don't have to fear of loosing work or being sued, unless of course they just put their names randomly online, go through the proper channels.

What made me quite angry was reading a article that was released today from other female comedians, saying that they felt sorry for up and coming female comedians as this is what they're facing! Even after all of this that has happened there's silence! Now is the perfect time to speak up, tell the authorities what you know about these men.

A lot of people's reputations will be destroyed with false allegations and the armchair detective's guessing and just throwing names around. Innocent people will be the ones to suffer here, you only have to read some of the hate posted online for many male comedians without evidence, let the proper channels know the names of those who are guilty and put a stop to ruining the lives of those who are innocent.