To be utterly sick of parenting?

[Darkmode3]

I love my DS dearly, but the thought of parenting for another 8 years makes me exhausted and depressed.

I am sick of the constant nagging and worry. DS is 11 and becoming quite teenage- the hormones are kicking in. He also has ADHD which makes it all worse.

AIBU to think I’m going to enjoy it when he flies the nest?

I see so many posts about people who can’t seem to cope with being apart from their kids for more than two days and I wonder what is wrong with me- am I going to regret wishing these years away?

went on a week long work trip recently. Spoke to him regularly on the phone, but I enjoyed the time to myself.

Not unreasonable. Kids with ADHD are amazing but HARD.

Adolescence is hard, I'm already trying to manoeuvre the chess board of life to help me navigate those years with our child and they're only 2! It is a rough world to be raising a kid in.

Do you get much regular time each week/month away from your child? Like a book club, cinema club or roller derby league etc? Maybe something like that would help. I don't think it harms children at all to see that their parents have interests and lives beyond being their parent.

What people say and think are very different. Not many would admit to finding parenting as tough as it can be but if you don't have a partner, family or friends who can support you the way you need sometimes with it of course it's normal to feel like you need a break from it, you do.

DD is 4 and DS is 2. The bickering and winding eachother up is really depressing. I hate having to keep telling off one, then the other.. trying to convince them to be kind.. then trying to comfort the upset one while the other is also demanding a cuddle even though they’ve just pushed the other; and giving in because I do love them equally and saying no to a cuddle while already cuddling the other child fills me with incredible guilt.

The stomping of feet, DD is just starting to do the really loud angry fist balling screech when she doesn’t get her way or if she gets told off now. Its so bloody annoying.

The thing is; they never, ever act this way of hen anyone is over or if we’re out. They play so lovely all day if we’re out at a friends or out in general. If my family come over they also magically start sharing and hugging eachother and listening to me properly. People comment on how well behaved and sweet they are all the time and I’ve really got to bite my tongue because it’s all a bloody act, the second they leave they’re back to tearing up my house and my confidence in parenting them.

but yes, I feel you. It’s so tiring. I am tired.

I get that when my son goes to his grandmas I can't wait for him to come home then an hour after his return and we're on the second meltdown because he's drawn slightly out the line on a picture I think my god. I think for me it's more the constant juggle of trying to work then maintain the house plus make sure reading and spellings are done or packed lunch is ready. All after school clubs bags/kit is ready. I feel like a PA

and chauffeur. My co workers finish for the day go home and chill maybe do a few jobs my night is dashing to pick my son up then doing tea bath bed homework then all the housework and prep for school the next day by the time I sit down it's 10pm. It's worth it as I love him so much and days out together and cuddles make me happier than anything in this world however the typical day is draining and exhausting.

I'm currently trying to coax my autistic dd out of bed for school. Every morning is hell. Love her but jees it's hard work.

You’ll probably be like many parents on WIWIKAU (university parents mainly page) FB group and be utterly distraught! That said I didn’t cry when my son went to Uni. I’ve got 3 more years now until my youngest of 3 is 18 and I’ve got so much I want to do, including moving somewhere cheaper, and many holidays. I’ve been parenting for 30yrs next month, since my teens. I can’t wait to do some stuff for me, and prioritise myself for a change

Nothing wrong with you at all. More recently I have had weekends away without the children and not felt guilty at all! I think a break helps me with the everyday struggles of repetitiveness.

@Darkmode3
"but the thought of parenting for another 8 years makes me exhausted and depressed."
I hate to tell you this- but I'm 26 years in and no end in sight.....

You have my sympathy- I’m having a similar issue this morning.

I’d say age 7-11 is ‘peak adhd’ from my experience- when the hormones of puberty kick in it starts to feel a little less intense but there are other problems that come with the older ages. Adhd is tough x hugs x