Is this as common as I’ve heard? Worrying!

[Yukl]

DD starting nursery when she’s 1. I will be back at work. Lots of people have said to expect sleep to completely go wrong once she starts? I’m worrying as my job is very full on and not sure how I will manage.

@ColleenDonaghy as in waking every two hours?! I honestly think I would lose my job

If anything my kids slept better when they started nursery because they had busy days. My eldest was rarely sick too and I thought it was easy. I paid for it with my next two though. I had a couple of months where I was out of work as much as I was in due to sickness.
Like everything else though, this stage does pass.

My two slept like logs when they started. Both were just under a year and there was so much stimulation for them, with new people and new toys and attention from the staff, they were exhausted by bedtime. And there wasn't much sickness either. The nursery was good at telling the difference between sickness and being a little bit off colour so they were only sent home when they were actually sick.

Like everything else with children, people love to share the horror stories.

No change with DD1 really, DD2 (15mo today!) sleeps a LONG time after nursery days. She clocked up 15 hours once, 6:30pm to 9:30am, shortly after starting at 12mo. She needs a lot of sleep generally, and the first few weeks really tired her out. She's getting more used to it now. We didn't really have the illness thing with either. DD2 has always been exposed to stuff via DD1 anyway so she's had one cold since starting in June and that's it so far. We've been very lucky with both kids, they don't really get ill (me and DH get all the bugs instead).

Ds went at 12 months, didn't change his sleep and I can count on one hand the number of times he has been ill, including chicken pox (he is 3 now)

Knowing what I know now, I wouldn't have attempted full time until 18 or 24 months. The killer was the calls from the nursery to come pick up immediately as they had a temperature. I think they'd have been more resilient at that bit older.

I hope you have chosen a nursery with a sensible sickness policy. Mine thankfully didn't send them home at the first snuffle and were willing to care for them when they were just mildly ill and on meds.

My three had and have cast iron stomachs so bugs were never much of a problem; they always seems to escape!! Eldest had a tummy bug once, second never until around the age of 9 (really!) and youngest was at school, because I remember dismissing it only to relent when he puked at the school gates 🤐Eldest was just 2 when they had chicken pox and I was on mat leave, and the baby got it at 11 weeks (the GP swore blind they would have 'protection' from my and my milk...!) so no time off work. Eldest was 4 and it was the Easter holidays (the little so-and-sos when they did get sick, it was usually over a holiday period, mostly Christmas!!)

I don't recall much effect on sleep either. Of my three, DC3 was the oldest starting nursery at 10 months. The little shit disturbed my sleep relentlessly until self-weaned at 20 months, though latterly it had just been a case of chuck the boob out there and let them get on with it!!

If your LO does get sick often, console yourself that they are building up their immune system and it's therefore less likely that they will be off school when they start...

Not particularly sick and her sleep was fine

My first two were born in olden times when you got 18 weeks mat leave, and my understanding GP stretched my time off with sick leave as I BF fulltime and couldn't leave them.

Went to nursery at 5 and 7 months respectively. It was fine.

Mine were shit at sleeping regardless. One early riser and one wouldn't do their own bed.

Think dh and I averaged about 1 or 2 early darts a year, due to the Phone Call, but we never took time off work due to child illness. I had shit sleepers, but kids blessed with iron constitutions.

They don't prepare you for the snot in those parenting commercials or books!
My God, how can something so small produce such a consistent volume of snot.

Lol, worry about the illnesses you’re gonna catch more. I was ill for three months straight and it was fucking grim. I’d take bad sleep over that again any day. And I’m probably going to catch something else st some point :( I hope not though

Nursery also knew to phone dh, rather than me. Phones were meant to be off, so by the time the office had sent a runner to me and I'd find the head to ask permission, then found cover for me, it almost wasn't worth me going.

My daughters sleep was messed up (she was 2.5 when she went) They would put them all down for a sleep after lunch and she would sleep for 2-3 hours. Then she would not go to bed that night. I used to ask them to wake her after an hour but they didn’t always. Was really annoying.

I think it helps that my two don't get temperatures. Even when DD1 had scarlet fever, her temperature was elevated for her as I know what her norm is, but wouldn't have been regarded as having a temperature by a doctor or nursery (not that I would continue to send her in obviously but just to demonstrate her body doesn't react to stuff that way). But some kids are really prone to temperatures at every little bug and nurseries can be a bit overzealous.

Our nursery is very sensible thankfully, no phone calls about sniffles or anything like that. DD1 has been there since late summer 2019 or whenever nurseries reopened again and has only been sent home once, for the scarlet fever, which is obviously quite legitimate (although at the time she was just pale and upset and not like herself). I've kept her off another couple of times - once when we all got Norovirus over a weekend and once when she was just a bit tired and upset and under the weather. Otherwise she's never missed any other days to illness.

Oh but yes DH and I got hit really hard with bugs, not the kids. We were both ill for about three months solid, it was miserable, while DD1 just was snotty occasionally. We've dodged it with DD2, I guess we've exhausted the local bug pool for now.

To add a little hope - neither of mine had their sleep disrupted at all and one NEVER got a single bug.

Depends on the child but one of mine was more clingy for a week or 2 after staring nursery, needing extra cuddles and reluctant to be left at bedtime, waking crying at night etc. It didn't last long and was not a big problem. He didn't really get ill much but then he'd already caught a lot of bugs from his older sister and had been ill non stop for the first 8 months of his life.

Sleep was rubbish at nursery for a good 3 months but he just got on with it. Illnesses however.......ohhh my days!it was never ending🤦🏻‍♀️

Agree with everyone else, it's the illness that will be the problem. Have a chat with the nursery to see what they can do to reduce spread of illnesses. Do they have windows they can open? If any adults in the building have respiratory symptoms could they ask them to wear a mask (staff and parents at pick up/drop off etc). Ideally what each room needs is a decent air purifier, something like this one. Really hope all goes well with your return to work OP and your little one settles well into nursery.

LEVOIT Smart Air Purifier for Home Large Room, Covers up to 147m², CADR 697m³/h, APP Control and PM2.5 Monitor, H13 HEPA Filter Removes Particles, Allergies, Dust, Smoke, Alexa Control, White : Amazon.co.uk: Home & Kitchen

I didn’t encounter this with my 2.

In fact they slept better as they were shattered

My DC didn’t go into group childcare (nanny before) until she was 3 and then was masked for a year. She was 4 when they stopped masking and still got sick constantly. I think the only thing that her being older made better was that she can entertain herself more if we have to keep her home.

You might need to think about getting a nanny if you have to be in all the time and can't take time off for the kids sick days. It's expensive but often the only way of keeping a well paid job. Was for me anyway.

We had terrible separation anxiety for the first month and they just wanted to be on us all the time and they’d wake in the night and just scream for 2 hours - but they had never really been left with anyone else before. Agree the sickness was the worst - every month for the first year we lost a week of work.

No, waking for two hours, usually around1-3.

Eldest did the every two hours thing at times, but she was shit at sleep from day 1.

Honestly, going back can be brutal but you cope because you have to.