Teacher showed 15 film to Y7

[Littlepopsicle]

DS has just started Y7. All going well, loves his new school and is very settled.
Drama class last week, teacher told them the theme for this half term is something about haunted houses. She then showed them the trailer for The Woman in Black. DH and I eye rolled each other as soon as we heard this as we knew what was going to happen....no surprise, DS has been unable to sleep alone since seeing this. We are very careful about anything he watches as he has an overactive imagination, is easily scared and sleep is easily disrupted. DH is annoyed at having another disturbed night with DS and thinks we should complain to the school. Do you think we should complain and say this is inappropriate to show to 11 and 12 years olds, or at least parents should have been warned that this was going to be shown? Or would you say it's a non-issue, get over it, he's just an over sensitive child?

Hi OP

I’ve just checked my DVD and it says 12, not 12a or 15. So yes, maybe a bit premature to be showing this at the start of year 7, and should probably be moved to year 8.

I get it as the film itself did scare me as an adult. I also remember seeing films like the Ring (15) at 14 years old and I shit my pants.

However, do you take your son to the cinema? If so, it may be worth talking this thing through with him, going through the trailer with him as he’ll be exposed to lots of certificate-appropriate trailers at the cinema, regardless of genre, so i’d say this reaction to a trailer may be a bit extreme.

Personally I don’t think horror films are for everyone and there isn’t a need to teach the horror genre at school. If the school is wanting to teach that particular play technique (with the same cast playing multiple roles etc), I’m sure there are other examples.

I'm an English teacher.

I'd want to know so that the pastoral team and class tutor can keep an eye on him and help him with strategies to overcome his anxiety.

It isn't usual for a Y7 to be upset over something like a film trailer, but that doesn't mean that his reaction should be invalidated.

So, yes, @Littlepopsicle I think you should tell the teacher, placing the emphasis on your son, and his reaction, and not on the school curriculum and choices of the teacher in applying it. The teacher won't have gone rogue in showing it, in an attempt to scare or shock. As it's drama, they'll have shown it to show acting skills, cinematography etc.

That’s not in the trailer? I’ve just watched it. The scariest thing in it is probs seeing someone come out of the marsh. Have you watched the trailer - the thing the OPs son watched???? It’s not the film, it doesn’t show dead kids and everything your spouting on about. Maybe watch it.

I actually watched the whole film ( well as much as you can watch in an hour) in year 7. I don't think my maths teacher really knew what it was and it was the last day of term before Christmas and he just stuck on the dvd.

@Littlepopsicle

Is your DS often scared of images, and does he catastrophise about them? I ask because, when I filled out the Childhood Depression and Anxiety Questionnaire for my DS1’s ADHD assessment, this was a clear marker for ADHD. I was the same as a child, I had terrible phobias of various images.

Perhaps instead of filing a complaint, you might ask school to keep an eye on your DS and feed back if they have any concerns that he might not be ‘typically’ developing?

No-one has had hysterics. A boy has had trouble sleeping due to a scary film trailer. It's ok to let the teacher know he is struggling with it. Education is very much one size fits all, and often it is not a fit, for many people. It's not ok to minimise someone else's reaction to a film clip because you were ok with it.

People keep saying it's a scary film but he didn't watch the film, just a trailer.
Your DS is obviously sensitive but if you make a fuss about this you are going to find secondary school very hard going. Perhaps you need a more general chat with his tutor or year head about how anxious /sensitive your son is. I say this because letting just one teacher know isn't going to help if he gets affected by things in other lessons. At least if all his subject teachers know they're in a better place to support him

The hysterics is about you not the OPs son.

OPs son is probably being a bit sensitive but she’s had good advice from teachers and others and I’m sure she’ll speak to his teacher in a polite way. Jumping straight to complaining isn’t on though, especially when she doesn’t have her facts right (ie it being a 12 not a 15).

120 complaints for perspective. Complaints in this context are irrelevant.

Woman In Black is a 12 A. The BBFC, that said, use it as a case study. A few years later, ratings were modified slightly to reflect intensity of response, largely off the back of complaints about WIB. It remains a 12 A notwithstanding. Sky ratings are pretty arbitrary.

Just to be clear, someone upthread mentioned 'educational purposes' and 15s , perfectly appropriately mentioning year 10. If a teacher were showing a full 15, the students need to be within a year of their 15th birthdays. Within a year of 18th for 18s, so year 12 upwards.

I wouldn't show the whole of WIB to year 7 personally as I know some students are quite scared by it. Year 8 or 9...fine with warnings.

Rather than the whole school having to accommodate your child, it would make more sense for him to remove himself from lessons when it has been sign-posted that they're about to do something scary.

You have no grounds for complaint about your child bring shown age-appropriate resources
,

I have one DD2 with ADHD and ASD diagnosed and she loves horror films - she does still find WiB scary though.

DD1 had an adverse reaction to a horror topic at school and is as far as we know, NT, but is highly sensitive and imaginitive.

I think the issue here is that OP has talked about complaining, had the thread been asking for advice I'm sure the replies would be speak to the teacher about your DS going forward.

It's not a complaint to the school that's needed as they haven't done anything wrong but OPDS clearly has a support need when it comes to sensitive material and that needs to be fed back

@Littlepopsicle i think some posters are giving you a bit of a hard time. It’s refreshing to hear that some parents are still trying to help their child navigate the growing up journey and not just exposing them to “everything” without a thought - some DC are more sensitive than others and that’s ok. I remember not allowing my DS to play certain video games which were violent / misogynistic and being told by others that “he will see it eventually and much worse”. My DS is also a sensitive soul and got very upset over things his peers didn’t- it wasn’t about us being precious, it was about supporting a child who is very empathic.

But I do think YWBU to complain about it. And I do agree that you need to help your DS build resilience but it sounds like you are already doing that and you sound like a thoughtful, sensible parent.

DVDs are rated 12. There is no 12A rating for DVDs. That's about purchasing.

I’m a teacher. If I want to show a 12 in year 7
or a 15 in year 10, I generally send a quick email home to forewarn parents and so they can let me know if there’s likely to be an issue.

in this case, where that ship has already sailed, my concern would be that if they’ve started with haunted houses, maybe other lessons will show other clips. Because of that, I think a friendly, calm email to the teacher (maybe asking which other clips will be shown so that you can watch them together at home first?) is appropriate. Not a complaint, just so that the teacher is aware and can support your son.

I think the questions are to mark the level of anxiety and depression and not indicative of ADHD at all as ADHD has its own, very separate criteria.

You haven’t said how he’s likely to feel now - or how he felt after the Hallowe’en sitcom.

There’s huge range between actual trauma (which I know you haven’t said) and one nightmare and a “urgh” shiver feeling about it if mentioned.

People seek out horror and other emotive genres for a reason.

Her first horror movie was at another kid’s sleepover - it was ever thus!

It was months later that she told me it had given her nightmares - because she didn’t want to be told off. Of course I told her she wouldn’t have been told off so badly that it wasn’t worth the comfort. But actually - she didn’t need comfort.

In the moment, she woke up scared. But quickly knew why she’d had the nightmares. Even revelled in it - her and her friends apparently bonded over how hard they were to watch it, and having had nightmares was something to boast about, not hide. Now years on they’ll have a sleepover here and all laugh, “remember when we couldn’t sleep after that film at Lily’s?!”

Not everyone enjoys that genre, but I would say that no-one seeks out a genre that has no emotional impact on them. That would be dull!

So even if he was more sensitive than average to it - consider whether that’s actually a bad thing. It might not be. Even if he doesn’t come to enjoy the impact of a nightmare, he may be unbothered by it. One night of poor sleep and a <shudder> “not watching that film” and move on, may be all the actual impact anyway.

Resilience isn’t not being scared. It’s being scared in the moment then moving on unscathed. You can’t force resilience, but you can give it space to develop by keeping everyone’s reactions proportionate.

@Littlepopsicle what is on the curriculum for the rest of year 7? Do you know? Can you find out? I'd probably look at that as a first step.

Do agree that it's not a kind module to start with and you don't want children not wanting to go to drama lessons at the start of year 7.

Most schools would not do this at the start of year 7.

Tbf I find the trailer scary too and I'm almost 30 🤣

Missed a sentence there - when I switch to “her” I’m talking about my older girl’s experience a few years back.

DVD doesn't have a 12a category

So did he see the film or the trailer?
As there’s a massive difference.

The trailer like it says in the OP. PP have just been running their mouths about the film when in reality the trailer is very mild and doesn’t show much about the film other than there’s a house haunted by the woman in black.

The trailer!