Did something embarrassing at work

[helpmeohgod]

I’ve had a lot going on my personal life, I won’t bore everyone with it all but things have been really, really tough recently. I’ve focused on work and wouldn’t let it distract me but I had a meeting with my boss and basically broke down and admitted things have been bad and explained it all. She was absolutely lovely and was genuinely upset for me with what I had told her, but I feel so stupid now for doing that. I basically cried and trauma dumped everything on her and it was incredibly unprofessional and I really regret it. It all just seemed to come spilling out when she asked what was wrong. That was a few weeks ago and I still feel so embarrassed by it because I should have kept my problems separate from work etc

i don’t really know what I’m asking, but has anyone got any advice? I feel so mortified and annoyed at myself. My boss was lovely about it and we haven’t talked about it since thankfully but I regret dumping it all on her and mixing personal and work and I feel so embarrassed for basically crying and breaking down and I’m really struggling with his annoyed at myself I am

I really wouldn't worry about this. I "trauma-dumped" (good word!) on an almost complete stranger the other day. If anything it could help you. At least your boss will be mindful not to overload you with work at this time.

You’re being tough on yourself…. Don’t forget the ‘ new thing ‘ is …. ‘ bring your whole self to work!’ ✔️

Another for ‘don’t worry about it’, many of us have been in same situation! Honestly!

Could you go back to your manager and explain that you feel uncomfortable about crying in front of her? She might be wondering whether she has upset you further in some way if you are being a bit ‘off’ with her. It could be an opportunity to update her on your situation, if that is appropriate, but I am sure she will be fine about it all.

💐

I understand why you are feeling the way you are but please, go easy on yourself. I’m a manager of a team of people and part of my job is to be there for them for the work related problems and personal ones. Everyone is human and it sounds like your manager understands that you are human and you needed someone to talk to and for someone to listen. It sounds like she done that which is great. Be kind to yourself. And it sounds like you have a good manager who you can go to in future if you need to or feel comfortable to. I hope you are ok x

What you've demonstrated is that you can focus well on your work when you have a lot going on in your personal life - because you only let it interfere in one meeting with your line manager. Sometimes you need there to be one person at work who does know and understand that that is taking some effort!

Having been a manager this has happened to me a few times and if anything I feel privileged they wanted to share with me. I didn't find it unprofessional at all - sometimes people need to talk and have a good cry. It's important they know if you're going through a tough time as it might impact your work and they'll be more lenient.

Please don't be embarrassed.

I've sobbed down the phone to my extremely understanding manager on more than one occasion. As a manager myself, I would happily listen to someone else's worries and have done many times. Tears and emotions often come into this! I really wouldn't worry - and I hope times get better soon.

She asked OP, that means she wanted you to tell her! You haven't 'dumped' anything on her, she won't feel the weight of your problems the way you do and will have been hoping to lighten the load for you a little by offering a listening ear, you have nothing to be embarrassed about

You are human. Honestly. None of us are robots and it's not unprofessional to share your personal difficulties with your manager. You haven't done anything wrong.

(I came out of a Police video interview and phoned my senior manager and cried down the phone...I do work in a 'peopley' supportive type job, but still). There is nothing at all wrong with acknowledging you're not having a great time.. it can provide context as well. If one of my team are struggling at home, I want to know because I genuinely care, and also because it gives me context if their work performance is a bit off.