Is it just me or is this job bloody awful? Not sure I want to go back.

[TAwo4]

I finished my second week on Friday. I've slept most of the day today.

I'm a TA supporting three children with SEN in a reception class, two aren't toilet trained and wear nappies.

Although I seem to be spending more time with the other reception children than with the three I'm supposed to be supporting.

I've already had to deal with a serious safeguarding situation with one child and yesterday a child accused me of hitting them. Thankfully they admitted very quickly they had made it up but I dread to think what would have happened other wise.

It's so intense, physically and mentally draining. I feel like I have no head space left when I leave at the end of the day. Nothing left to give my own child. No energy to cook or clean.

They pay itself is really poor.

My hours are 8:45 - 3:15 which causes issues with the school run for my own child who has ASD. I've been late to work every day since I started. There's no wrap around care at DC's school so my DC attends a few activity type clubs a couple of days of the week which he hates and the other days I'm scrambling around trying to find other parents to collect him and wait in the playground until I arrive.

People keep saying it will get easier but honestly, it really doesn't feel like it.

I take medication that makes me more tired than normal, I also have anxiety which I'm medicated for and ASD myself.

I love all the kids already and do enjoy the job but it is so intense and full on for very little pay.

@TAwo4 that does sound hard supporting 3 pupils plus being the class TA. I support one child plus the class TA but the Child with SEN comes first and if he needs regulating etc that takes priority. If you are funded for those 3 children then they are the priority. Reception children if explained in age appropriate language will understand that you are there to support XYZ and they can ask the teacher or you will be with them in x amount of time. Reception children are particularly good at understanding the needs of children with SEN in my experience.

I am sorry you received that allegation. That is incredibly stressful and there is no getting away from it the pay is crap. I do another job alongside it

I’m a teacher which is absolutely exhausting. My TA works so bloody hard and I dread the day she says enough is enough because she won’t be replaced ( not that anyone could). It always makes me laugh on mumsnet when posters go on about the TA and teacher should be doing X, Y and Z , it’s absolutely impossible . Last year we lost three staff to supermarkets, they haven’t been replaced.

… get out while you can.

6.5 hour days are hard? Really? No job is easy whatever you do, but it’s a bit of a stretch to say 6.5 hours is too hard. Jesus, you want to try 8pm to 8am night shift on a ward, without a break,in a hospital to work around school hours. I despair at how soft touch people are nowadays. If you can’t hack it get something else ffs

6.5 hour days are hard? Really? No job is easy whatever you do, but it’s a bit of a stretch to say 6.5 hours is too hard. Jesus, you want to try 8pm to 8am night shift on a ward, without a break,in a hospital to work around school hours. I despair at how soft touch people are nowadays. If you can’t hack it get something else ffs

There are some things that I'd find intolerable for 5 minutes let alone 6.5 hours. Judging by the above post, I suspect that includes your company.

I used to be a TA for an SEN setting - the job included some 1:1 and some general TA work.
YANBU for being knackered because it is an exhausting job! Physically, mentally, emotionally draining. I used to have a nap every day when I got home.

I would however vote YABU if there was a poll because:

• why would you take a job where you knew you couldn’t manage the hours with childcare?
• because of the childcare/hours thing you are probably making yourself and your child unnecessarily stressed, and it is also not fair on the children at school if you are continually late. It’s really not on to be late because you haven’t organised yourself appropriately.
• yes the pay is shit and should be a lot more… but you know what the pay is when you take the job.

I do really hope you manage to get everything sorted and things become easier for you. When I was a TA I loved it and although it wasn’t what I wanted to do forever, I have very fond memories of those years in the job.

To be fair I have worked in an SEN setting as a TA and on a hospital ward.

I was definitely just as exhausted every day working at school as I was working in the hospital. Maybe I had just toughened up and had better stamina, I don’t know.

But I do think there is a lot to be said for spending the day interacting with adults vs spending the day interacting with children.

I don’t think it’s very fair to knock someone for being tired after working a thankless job as well as looking after their own children, even if the hours are less. You don’t know what OPs physical abilities are like, how long/tricky the commute is, or what their home life is like. OP deserves benefit of the doubt

I'd find something else OP. I also have autism and anxiety and I'd find that utterly intolerable, indeed as did an NT friend who has just left after 7 years of being a TA. She loved it at first but the school had to take more pupils with SN than it could handle and the situation became utterly intolerable for all concerned. She's been badly injured by pupils three times now and the third time was too much for her, plus knowing that she couldn't give any of the children her best because she was so overloaded and she spent much of her time trying to protect the less mobile children from acts of aggression.

I would never again try to do any job that triggered severe anxiety in me as it just isn't worth it, unless you have no choice.

I hope that things get better for you.

@Throwncrumbs

ive done 15 hour shifts in a carehome during covid then got a reception SEN TA job. What a doddle I thought it would be and how wrong I was. Like a zombie by the end of the school day. So no, your point is just wrong and stupid. We are all different.

I don’t think it’s very fair to knock someone for being tired after working a thankless job as well as looking after their own children, even if the hours are less. You don’t know what OPs physical abilities are like, how long/tricky the commute is, or what their home life is like. OP deserves benefit of the doubt

Exactly plus OP has ASD. She also has a child with SN and suffers from anxiety and exhaustion caused by the side effects of medication. She has more than enough challenges to face even before she walks through the classroom door.

Agree with wasps

It is a hard job! Make me laugh when some people think it’s ‘just reading with a few kids’

Nope!

It’s full on and draining - you need the holidays to recover.

I agree you need to change your hours. They would rather you are there most of the day and you could make your hours up over lunch time. The only downside is you won’t get the after school support of decompressing -

Good luck what eve you decide - 10 years and I’m in a different job and so much happier.

Would you be doing this job out of choice if you didn’t have children ? If not…and you’re not loving it …. leave.

@AcclimDD

Well nothing stopping that poster from getting a reception TA job. Plenty of them about. Maybe she can stop being a martyr then about her super long shifts.

I’ve work with SEND kids for a while and its bloody hard work for shit pay.

I would never be a SEN TA as they seem to deal with most of the behaviour.

I’ve been kicked, punch, spat at, hair ripped out, a table thrown at me etc (all whilst trying to do my actual job) but my TAs get it 10x worse.

It is mentally draining which you wouldn’t mind if it was good money but it’s not.

I think when you have kids yourself it’s very difficult because you don’t get to have a break all day and it’s hard finding the energy to be happy with your own kids.

There is a reason why there are always adverts for SEN TAs.

Honestly OP I would look for something else.

If you can’t find a school job then look for a job that has long shifts which you can work over 2/3 days as this is so much easier because then you can have full days off.

In all honestly id probably quit tomorrow but DH doesn't want me to.

He can do the school run, then.

And look after DS whilst you search for a job more suitable for you.

I wouldn't advocate quitting until you have another job. But start actively job hunting straight away

Join a union immediately. Imperative if you work in a school.

Join the NEU or other union before you set foot back in the classroom.

The next allegation could derail your career and you need the backup.

Sad to hear your situation OP. When are salaries going to reflect the sheer hard work required in so many under-appreciated roles. I dread to think what schools would do without TA’s. Work should pay and it’s a disgrace that so often it doesn’t .

.

3 words. Fuck that shit.

Yeah. Dh said we can't go on holiday next year if I quit. We've already paid the deposit and the kids are so excited. I don't want to be the one that stops that

It is a really hard job. It’s mentally and physically draining and the reality is it won’t get easier; but it will get easier to deal with. You learn what to prioritise and you learn that you’re never finished, there’s always more to do so you need to cut off.
We have a few TA’s that finish at 2.30, speak to your boss and see if you could alter your hours.
Only you know if it’s for you but give it a bit longer.