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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

There's too much pressure on year 7's

23 replies

69Pineapples69 · 15/09/2023 16:39

OK.. First post so I'll try not to drip feed. DS 3 is in yr 7. He has a twin brother (DS 2) who is not in the same class as per request and an older brother in yr 9 (DS 1). DS 3 has really struggled with this transition, he was so excited in the summer holidays but now wakes up crying every morning, and goes to bed crying the night before. He was the same with his yr 6 SATS. I have tried and tried to console him, reassure him, let him know that the results don't matter but also tried to find a balance between being too soft and offering too much encouragement. I've taken the stance that these tests shouldn't come at the cost of your mental health and so if you freeze up on the day then so be it. Some people just really can't do them. Any way I've just had an email from the school to say they have got to sit tests every lesson for three days. Apparently this is a nationwide thing and now I'm terrified that he's going to have to battle with his feelings again, when today he came home in a really good mood and when asked about his day he said he was feeling better. We have had an age appropriate mental health talk and i have bought him a book aimed at his age that explains his feelings are normal and has some positive affirmations in there. He also has a worry journal. I am of course monitoring it very closely, without being a helicopter parent, to try and ascertain if this is just back to school nerves or does it go deeper, and will take the steps necessary to get him some help if needed. I should also mention he is not very academic and much prefers tests of physical ability rather than mental. So my AIBU

YABU they're just tests, you and you're kids need to suck it and stop being such babies
YANBU why on earth and how on earth are they supposed to measure progress in yr 7 when they will have only been back to school for 3 weeks, they have enough pressure on them as it is, trying to keep up in lesson, follow all these rules, make friends and find their way round a massive school.

OP posts:
YakChewCrumbs · 15/09/2023 16:41

A bit of both really. Ask school for Elsa support asap. He can learn some skills to help with the anxiety and exams.

DaughterNo2 · 15/09/2023 16:41

Are you talking about CAT tests? How schools put pupils into sets?

Original poster
69Pineapples69 · 15/09/2023 16:45

DaughterNo2 · 15/09/2023 16:41

Are you talking about CAT tests? How schools put pupils into sets?

Yes, maybe I miss read but I'm sure it said in the letter there will not be any help for how to sit the exam. They are computer based and the instructions are on the screen, I'll double check now

OP posts:
DiverseCity · 15/09/2023 16:45

I don’t know about these tests but could
you frame it positively? Say that they are for the school’s benefit and for his. They are to ensure that he is put with the right pupils and teachers to ensure that he learns the best. Maybe emphasise that regular testing makes the school understand where he is at and that they can cater the teaching to him accordingly. I don’t know if that would work?

IsItThough · 15/09/2023 16:47

I would go and have a chat with the head of year (and if they are a halfway decent school they will have someone in charge of transition too) and just explain where your son is at atm. He sounds like he needs some gentle support and a bit of compassion, at the very least. If you even suspect this is more than as you suggest "back to school nerves", flagging with school now may be helpful.

Re the tests- they will be baseline tests to work out where they are starting from, not progress in 3 weeks. So he doesn't have to "perform" especially. It may affect which classes he is put in depending upon school approach to setting.

Original poster
69Pineapples69 · 15/09/2023 16:48

YakChewCrumbs · 15/09/2023 16:41

A bit of both really. Ask school for Elsa support asap. He can learn some skills to help with the anxiety and exams.

What is Elsa support? I have never heard of this before.

OP posts:
DaughterNo2 · 15/09/2023 16:49

69Pineapples69 · 15/09/2023 16:45

Yes, maybe I miss read but I'm sure it said in the letter there will not be any help for how to sit the exam. They are computer based and the instructions are on the screen, I'll double check now

Show quote history

Both of mine had them in Y7.
perhaps try reassuring that whatever set they are put in can be fluid for the first couple of years (was at both schools here) So not the be all and end all if he ends up in a lower set due to nerves etc. I’m sorry that won’t help with his anxiety and being so upset at the moment

Original poster
69Pineapples69 · 15/09/2023 16:50

DiverseCity · 15/09/2023 16:45

I don’t know about these tests but could
you frame it positively? Say that they are for the school’s benefit and for his. They are to ensure that he is put with the right pupils and teachers to ensure that he learns the best. Maybe emphasise that regular testing makes the school understand where he is at and that they can cater the teaching to him accordingly. I don’t know if that would work?

I haven't told him yet. He came home in such a good mood that I just wanted to let him have it! 😭 I think you're right though. If he picks up on any anxiety from me it's just going to make it worse isn't it? So I need to put a positive spin on it. Me and my husband will rehearse tonight! 😅

OP posts:
Talipesmum · 15/09/2023 16:51

I don’t know what these tests are but our high school has regular low-impact testing every 3 weeks ish in each subject. It’s basically a way for the kids to refresh and remember the most recent topic they’ve just been covering, and for the teacher to check for general gaps in understanding/ misapprehension / things to teach better. It’s a very “collaborative” thing. I was initially apprehensive about these but it’s done in a very quick matter of fact way, sometimes they’re asked to look through their work as homework in prep for a test in the next lesson, sometimes they just happen with no notice. It’s been quite helpful in reducing testing freakout, and getting them used to revisiting and remembering work.

Original poster
69Pineapples69 · 15/09/2023 16:55

Talipesmum · 15/09/2023 16:51

I don’t know what these tests are but our high school has regular low-impact testing every 3 weeks ish in each subject. It’s basically a way for the kids to refresh and remember the most recent topic they’ve just been covering, and for the teacher to check for general gaps in understanding/ misapprehension / things to teach better. It’s a very “collaborative” thing. I was initially apprehensive about these but it’s done in a very quick matter of fact way, sometimes they’re asked to look through their work as homework in prep for a test in the next lesson, sometimes they just happen with no notice. It’s been quite helpful in reducing testing freakout, and getting them used to revisiting and remembering work.

I feel like he would be better if this was the case. More formal, can just do it in the classroom, but these have to be sat in exam conditions...oh I feel like I'm being silly. I'm probably just being silly 😔

OP posts:
YakChewCrumbs · 15/09/2023 16:55

Emotional Literacy Support Assistant - most schools have one.

Good luck!

VickyEadieofThigh · 15/09/2023 16:58

Many schools do CAT or similar ability tests (because SATS tell them very little indeed - my niece, who is off to Birmingham university tomorrow, 'failed' her English SAT because she had a meltdown in one of her Y6 English SATS. She got grade 9 for English in GCSEs...) but they're not exactly "nationwide".

"Low stakes tests" are a teaching and learning strategy used frequently in schools now to help pupils consolidate their learning - they often use computer multiple choice quizzes which the children really enjoy.

itsmyp4rty · 15/09/2023 16:59

There is constant testing through secondary school, it often seems endless. Then the Yr 10's get really serious, then there's mocks, GCSE's, Yr 12's, mocks, A-levels.

It's really relentless and only gets worse.

The CATS though are not something you need to prepare for, they're cognitive ability tests and used by a lot of secondary schools. At our school they're run over 2 days in the same way the 'real' exams are with invigilators, but that might vary.

I would be concerned about his anxiety levels - is it possible he's ND? It sounds like he struggled with the transition - how is he friends wise? Be positive but chilled about them and this will hopefully help him a bit.

Zwellers · 15/09/2023 17:01

What does your other yr7 child make of it, is he just quietly getting on with things.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 15/09/2023 17:05

They're not Pass/Fail tests. They pick up on areas where children are more able and where they could benefit from a little help - and they are useful in identifying masking ND children as well.

WonderingWanda · 15/09/2023 17:06

Tell him they aren't tests for a start they are assessments. Teachers just need to know what he can and can't do so they can make sure they fill any gaps and support him as needed. It's not meant to be any pressure on him at all.

Original poster
69Pineapples69 · 15/09/2023 17:09

itsmyp4rty · 15/09/2023 16:59

There is constant testing through secondary school, it often seems endless. Then the Yr 10's get really serious, then there's mocks, GCSE's, Yr 12's, mocks, A-levels.

It's really relentless and only gets worse.

The CATS though are not something you need to prepare for, they're cognitive ability tests and used by a lot of secondary schools. At our school they're run over 2 days in the same way the 'real' exams are with invigilators, but that might vary.

I would be concerned about his anxiety levels - is it possible he's ND? It sounds like he struggled with the transition - how is he friends wise? Be positive but chilled about them and this will hopefully help him a bit.

I'm starting to think this way. Which is why I'm monitoring it. But the primary school never had any concerns...doesn't mean there aren't any though. He could be masking.

OP posts:
picturethispatsy · 15/09/2023 17:12

Poor kid. It’s endless pressure these days in school. I bet he wonders what the Y6 sats were even for!
I remember in Y7 (back in the dark ages) they just let us be in classes with friends for the first term, then moved us according to teacher assessments at the start of the next term. No fuss, no pressure.
It’s no wonder so many kids are struggling in school, it’s a never ending cycle of testing 😞 I don’t think you’re fussing OP @69Pineapples69

Original poster
69Pineapples69 · 15/09/2023 17:13

Zwellers · 15/09/2023 17:01

What does your other yr7 child make of it, is he just quietly getting on with things.

Yep. He just gets up, gets dressed and gets on with it. When I ask him about his day he recalls good moments and bad moments or things he did and didn't like but he generally smiles or laughs about his day and is eager to tell me about it...which i know is a feat in itself! At least they talk to me about their day, I know many people just get a "meh" from their kids so that's something I guess!

OP posts:
Original poster
69Pineapples69 · 15/09/2023 17:22

Thank you everyone. Its clear I am letting my own worry as a mother override rational thinking. There's no need to make a big deal of these tests and I should just think positively about them. After all I never had these tests but it probably would have helped me in school. I will ask about Elsa, as he clearly struggles. Thank you all for your advice and kind words, it's much appreciated 🥰

OP posts:
Prescottdanni123 · 15/09/2023 17:23

Speak to school. They could put measures in place such as rest breaks if he is getting stressed about it.

Dacadactyl · 15/09/2023 17:29

My son is same age as yours and in year 7.

Tests are a part of life and don't mind if my kids get tests every week tbh.

But im annoyed the school haven't settled them straight away using their SATS results. They will apparently put them in sets after Christmas and do their own tests ro decide who goes where.

End result is that my son is now in a class with a very disruptive boy, who I'm praying won't be in his set.

Original poster
69Pineapples69 · 15/09/2023 17:36

Dacadactyl · 15/09/2023 17:29

My son is same age as yours and in year 7.

Tests are a part of life and don't mind if my kids get tests every week tbh.

But im annoyed the school haven't settled them straight away using their SATS results. They will apparently put them in sets after Christmas and do their own tests ro decide who goes where.

End result is that my son is now in a class with a very disruptive boy, who I'm praying won't be in his set.

I think tests every week would have to be more formal, just in the classroom as they couldn't have invigilators in every week! This would suit me fine and I think he would cope much better. But yes, annoying they put them through SATS. does anyone know if and how they are used? Are they just stats for the schools, to measure the teachers capabilities?

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