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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Husbands Alarm

37 replies

AlarmHater · 15/09/2023 06:22

DH has decided to take up running again and has 2 events to train for.

Twice in the last week he's set his alarm for 5.30 and low a behold has not gotten up to go for the run.

I'm a light sleeper and he knows all alarms wake me up and 99% of the time I can't get back to sleep. This morning I had to wake him as he blissfully slept through his alarm and yep, here I am wide awake downstairs with a coffee whilst he snores his head off upstairs.

I've not been feeling well this week, not sure what's wrong but just low level not feeling great, really really tired and I could honestly cry. The kids are off today and I was hoping to sleep until 7.30 before getting up for work. I could actually cry, my head is pounding and I still feel exhausted but i tried to get back to sleep and just couldn't.

I don't think I would even mind so much if he'd actually got up to go on his run but as it stands I've been woken up for zero reason.

Even a phone vibration wakes me. Is there any kind of watch alarm that's quiet enough it would only wake the person wearing it?

OP posts:

Butterflywings2 · 15/09/2023 14:24

My DP did this is in the mornings before starting a very early job, he snoozed his alarm for the best part of an hour whilst I led there infuriated. He now sleeps on the sofa on weekdays- it's bliss

Original poster

AlarmHater · 15/09/2023 16:45

The kids aren't super young however the little one does need help to get breakfast, takes about 10 minutes to make a choice on what said breakfast should be, then they start to bicker or mess around and yes I should be working at that time.

I'll maybe speak to him tomorrow, I'm tired and still feel like utter shite and I just don't have the patience for a discussion on this right now.

I must say, this is his one bad quality and today was exceptionally selfish for him (leaving the kids) so overall not a bad guy just incredibly fucking annoying at times.

OP posts:

FeistyPanther1611 · 15/09/2023 22:51

OMG my husband sometimes does this and it drives me batshit. Exactly the same as you, he sets it for some ungodly hour, repeatedly snoozes it whilst he snores except the first crack of dawn one woke me and now my mind is full of things and I can’t get back to sleep. Worse still was the time he had some godawful app that tracked his sleep state and woke him according to a good time in his sleep cycle. Bloody thing would start gently rousing him around 4 and would jerk me out of deep sleep. That didn’t last long.

luckily my husband generally is not a selfish CW and if he were to do this on a regular basis I could ask him to stop and he would. I tolerate the occasions it happens. But I do feel your pain OP. Twice a week would not work for me! You are more patient than I’d be.

Iwishikneweverything · 15/09/2023 23:13

im married nearly 40 years. My advice. When he’s asleep. Turn off his alarm. 👍

Gcsunnyside23 · 15/09/2023 23:53

By god I'd not be letting him stay asleep of he woke me up with his alarm. If I was up then he sure would be too. Either force him up or turn his alarm off when he's sleeping as he's not going to get up anyway

CoffeeBeansGalore · 16/09/2023 00:04

If he wants to set his alarm early then he sleeps on the sofa with everything he needs ready next to him.

SweetBirdsong · 16/09/2023 00:07

He needs to sleep on the couch !!! Selfish arsehole. This is grounds for divorce IMO.

SweetBirdsong · 16/09/2023 00:10

I know it is no help, but when I read stuff like this - and about women being kept awake by snoring, left, right and centre, I'm so absolutely grateful that I've had my own bedroom separate from my husband for the last 15 years. His snoring is so loud it could wake the dead.

AND, I would lose my fucking shit if my DH woke me most days with a 5.30am alarm.

Surprised someone hasn't come on here yet to post 'actually OP, 5.30am isn't that early really. Are you usually a lazy person?' 😆

namestevalian · 16/09/2023 00:12

My partner has a vibrating under pillow alarm designed for deaf people and it doesn't wake me ( he isn't deaf, Kish doesn't want to wake me !)

ChesterAndRaoul · 16/09/2023 07:20

My partner is a snorer/mouth breather, and he has to wake up at 5/5:30 most days 😭

I use these, mainly because they were provided for the guys that worked with heavy machinery at my old job. They're very good, I still wake up for my own alarm on the bedside table, but I can't hear anything else. They are disposable though.

Earplugs

the7Vabo · 18/09/2023 20:37

My goodness OP, regardless of whether he actually gets up seeing as he knows you are a light sleeper if he wants a 530 alarm he can sleep on the couch or else figure out a time to go for a run that doesn’t impact you.

Mostlyoblivious · 19/09/2023 00:25

Sofa. I have zero patience if my sleep is meddled with

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