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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think the UK has become awful?

815 replies

ma1formed · 13/09/2023 20:26

I can't pinpoint when, but it feels like everything that was once pretty good is now quite awful

So expensive
No doctors
Uni costs for kids insane
Terrible rent / can't buy a house
Everyone seems quite unpleasant or racist

Is it just me?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
13
bombastix · 14/09/2023 08:48

@EasternStandard - I expect it to be hard funded policy so look out for it. I don't think you will see so much on the other things people want here. Frankly no money

MsRosley · 14/09/2023 08:50

ma1formed · 13/09/2023 22:42

I cannot think of a single situation in the UK where privatisation has actually gone well. Sorry, I think more NHS privatisation is a bloody terrible idea. But the money cunts probably see it differently of course.

British Telecom. Privatisation completely opened up telecommunications in this country. The rest, an absolute shitshow.

Alexandra2001 · 14/09/2023 08:50

derxa · 14/09/2023 08:37

Sir keir has been on GMB this morning saying he will not row back on Brexit. How often must this be stated.

Well he has to say this but i think he will have a series of mini deals with the EU to facilitate improvements in trade, education, crime reduction etc

barbieofswanlake · 14/09/2023 08:52

Have you lived outside of the U.K.? Racism exists but not anything like on the scale of many other countries. Try being of Egyptian descent (and assumed to be Muslim) in France. On all your other points I agree. But actually the U.K. is a very inclusive and tolerant country. The reason people think it's not is conversely because of our heightened awareness and concern compared to places where people just accept, or don't even notice

jgw1 · 14/09/2023 08:57

Alexandra2001 · 14/09/2023 08:50

Well he has to say this but i think he will have a series of mini deals with the EU to facilitate improvements in trade, education, crime reduction etc

As Rishi has done with Horizon.

Wanderingllama · 14/09/2023 08:59

Lots of us immigrants are emigrating because it is getting really bad. It is nothing like UK I came to even during 08-09 credit crunch.

Lol at "it's atill better than Afghanistan". If you have to compare UK to that to show how good life is, the life is not good!

Wakintoblueskies · 14/09/2023 09:01

Alexandra2001 · 14/09/2023 08:50

Well he has to say this but i think he will have a series of mini deals with the EU to facilitate improvements in trade, education, crime reduction etc

The EU will only agree if they benefit and rightly so.
I do not think the EU will come to any agreement about education in particular as the general consensus is the UK made their own bed.
Trade is different because of NI.
On a smaller scale, many households have simply stopped ordering online from the UK now as most can be accessed elsewhere in Europe. And what can't, can be done without.
I'm from an EU country and tbh the UK feels quite cut off and apart from the EU now, like a NC family member. A few years ago, people thought the UK was needed but have realised it really isn't.

ginandtonicwithlimes · 14/09/2023 09:03

Sundance03 · 14/09/2023 08:43

It sounds like England, Scotland isn't as bad

Helped by getting more money than the English.

DogInATent · 14/09/2023 09:04

EasternStandard · 14/09/2023 08:46

As long as they also put how they’ll fund it

Do they?

As long as they don't plan on giving billions to friends, family members and political donors any funding model is better than the current Tory one for not getting things done at great expense.

ginandtonicwithlimes · 14/09/2023 09:08

BookishBabe · 14/09/2023 08:39

My DM had my youngest sister in 2007, her 6th natural labour and delivery. Everything went very well and was completely ordinary. Free nappies and formula on the ward. She stayed in an NHS hospital for nearly a week while she tried to establish breastfeeding with the nurses and lactation support.
She also told them she had 5 older children at home and wanted more time to connect with her new baby and they let her stay pretty much until she was ready.

I had my first DS in 2017, c section, I was rushed out of the ward in less than 24hrs after major surgery. 15 hours after surgery when visiting hours were over my new born baby did a wee while I was changing him, when I called a nurse for help to lift him out the bassinet as I was in too much pain she told me "you're the mother, its your problem" and walked away and left me.
I provided my own nappies, Sanitary pads, formula, everything. I was barely checked on and when I was it was rushed. They couldn't provide the food I needed due to only having budget toast or weetabix and I had gestational diabetes. I cried a lot in the first 24 hours from frustration.
I went home with Paracetamol from my full abdominal surgery just 24hrs prior, which I was actually glad about because of how they treated me I just wanted to go home.

10 years apart (7 of which were under a consecutive Conservative government) our experiences are polar opposites of a safe and happy birth and labour ward.

Weirdly my experience last year after a c section was better than my first birth in 2017 which was a complicated vaginal. Might depend on the hospital. Not sure we should be getting the NHS to provide nappies etc unless you are on the bones of your arse though. BF support is shit though.

pollo8 · 14/09/2023 09:08

Life here, today, is better than the vast majority of places on earth.

This is an extremely tolerant and inclusive country, compared to most. If you disagree, I'd like to hear about where you think is better.

I agree that healthcare is probably better in a few other countries, but here we are obsessed with worshipping 'Our NHS' – yet wonder why no other nation has copied it. There are better systems, but we've got some mad quasi-religious attachment to ours.

I think consumerism has really skewed our priorities. My grandmother owned very little 'stuff' compared to what we own today. She spent her money on food, rent/mortgage and necessary household goods. She didn't have a £500 phone, a laptop, a £40,000 car, new clothes every month, TV subscriptions and all the other stuff we now think is essential. But it's considered deeply weird to live a simple life now. And we are products of our time, so it's hard not to go along with what everyone else is doing.

I would love to know what proportion of her monthly income she spent on food. I think we would consider it very high.

I'm no Pollyanna, I complain, just like the OP. But we could all do with a bit of perspective, and maybe the willingness to rejig our priorities.

ScottishIceCream · 14/09/2023 09:09

EasternStandard · 14/09/2023 06:13

That’s not that high for a lawyer. What’s your earning potential?

As for whether Labour will make various people happier, idk. Listening to Rayner the other day she was best on ‘we’re not the Tories’ but every other question on what they’d actually do was difficult and she hit a wall

I don't think Labour have no idea what they're going to do, I think they want to get into power and are playing very safe so that it happens, because right now the Conservatives are doing a good job of unelecting themselves.

EasternStandard · 14/09/2023 09:12

bombastix · 14/09/2023 08:48

@EasternStandard - I expect it to be hard funded policy so look out for it. I don't think you will see so much on the other things people want here. Frankly no money

I’m already looking out for it. Listening to AR the other day there’s a lot of confident talk on not the Tories but really suffered on what will you tax to fund what you’re promising

They also over promise every time they mention the 90s + given that was the upward swing before a bust based on risk exposure and credit purchases on HP, that we’re still paying back

It’ll be interesting to see how much people expect v what they can fund

BookishBabe · 14/09/2023 09:13

Not sure we should be getting the NHS to provide nappies etc unless you are on the bones of your arse though. BF support is shit though.

I definitely didn't need or want the NHS to supply nappies for my babies. I chose to have them and them pooping* *is in no way unexpected.
I'm just using it as another example of highlighting the difference in care we received.

ginandtonicwithlimes · 14/09/2023 09:14

Seychal · 14/09/2023 00:13

But it is OP's lived experience in London which is part of the UK. They cannot be omnipresent. Try living on £61k in Edinburgh or Bristol. Try being a lawyer on £61k in Hull, Lancaster or Worthing. OPs situation is very, very common these days.

They would be considered wealthy in Hull.

beAsensible1 · 14/09/2023 09:17

I agree OP, it also seems people are so mean and miserable. full of unkindness and miserly behaviour

beAsensible1 · 14/09/2023 09:25

barbieofswanlake · 14/09/2023 08:52

Have you lived outside of the U.K.? Racism exists but not anything like on the scale of many other countries. Try being of Egyptian descent (and assumed to be Muslim) in France. On all your other points I agree. But actually the U.K. is a very inclusive and tolerant country. The reason people think it's not is conversely because of our heightened awareness and concern compared to places where people just accept, or don't even notice

the problem with british racism is that they will pretend they're not racist and then treat you like shit or give you a promotion or scapegoat you or whatever other humiliation and act like you're and insane person when you say anything.

everything in this country is unsaid and hidden beneath fake politeness and microagression.

in france they'll just call you slur and keep in moving. simpler (to me.)

Wanderingllama · 14/09/2023 09:26

beAsensible1 · 14/09/2023 09:25

the problem with british racism is that they will pretend they're not racist and then treat you like shit or give you a promotion or scapegoat you or whatever other humiliation and act like you're and insane person when you say anything.

everything in this country is unsaid and hidden beneath fake politeness and microagression.

in france they'll just call you slur and keep in moving. simpler (to me.)

Absolutely correct.

Beautiful3 · 14/09/2023 09:31

Yes agreed. It's because we're over populated. Too many people needing housing/drs/transport/schools/driving etc. We need to stop people coming into the UK, unless they need their skill set. I think the government would be better off, offering free bursaries to UK residents to fill in the job market.

MaryLea · 14/09/2023 09:41

I know! I am partially sighted and tripped over my dog last month, snapping my two front teeth. I have an other month to wait before I can see the dentist. And I am lucky enough to have an NHS dentist. But luxury, sure.

KimberleyClark · 14/09/2023 09:41

Its very noticeable if you travel abroad a lot. The country looks run down and in dire need of major investment.

There are many run down areas in European countries and cities, it’s just as a tourist you don’t see them.

thebutcherswife · 14/09/2023 09:44

FirstYouGetTheMoney · 13/09/2023 23:17

What evidence do you have for that?

Research generally puts the UK in a very good position in this respect. You’re in the top 10%, close behind the leaders.

https://worldpopulationreview.com/country-rankings/least-racist-countries

Because I’ve live it and I see it Every. Single. Day. Just because some (probably paid for and biased) research you’ve found says different doesn’t make it so.

Redebs · 14/09/2023 09:46

Vote Tory and this is what you get.

Life would have been better with Corbyn.

Mojoj · 14/09/2023 09:48

I think you're referring to England here? Life in Scotland is not how you're describing it. Our kids don't pay university tuition, we don't pay for prescriptions and I can always get a doctor's appointment. We do pay more taxes which I'm fine about. I'm not, however, fine about being out of Europe and having to suffer a fucking Tory government, the blame for both, I lay squarely at England's feet.

TheNoonBell · 14/09/2023 10:01

I think it is all part of the post COVID great giving up.

No one cares anymore and just do the minimum.