I don't want to work anymore!

[ettieb]

I'm 55 and have been working since I was 16 apart from a couple of years off when my son was little. I'm so over working. I don't hate my job.. I've worked there a long time... with lovely people.. my boss is great and I can choose whether I work from home or go into the office or a bit of both.. so I know I'm very lucky but I just want freedom to do what I want when I want. It doesn't help that a lot of my friends are retired and do lovely things which I want to join in with. I can't believe I've got to do this for another 12 years... there are no options for me financially to go part time. We are on holiday at the moment in Devon.. nothing fancy.. just a caravan and cooking for ourselves mostly as we can't really afford to eat out... but I'm as happy as Larry... just knitting.. doing crosswords.. generally bimbling around doing my own thing. I just think I wanted to moan!

I'd like to retire at 65 (who knows what the future holds). I'm nowhere near 65 so staying positive and making the most of my life.

It sounds like you are enjoying it all. I could also think of things to do if I didn't work.

I retired from teaching at 56 1/2. I couldn't get teaching pension until 60. But I planned ahead and paid into a second pension and then drew down each year to live on. I'm not trying to be smug but I saw the burnout coming several years before it struck so started to pay into secondary pension which got government top up of 25 percent that could draw down keeping £1 under tax threshold. DH still works and earns well so I probably couldn't have done it without his support.

It certainly can. After 38 years full time, no maternity breaks(we’d have liked children but it never happened) I was heartily sick of being tied to a desk 8 hours a day five days a week. Going part time was not an option and neither was home working (I retired the summer before Covid hit) and I didn’t want to be in the situation of basically doing a full time job in fewer hours). My own job was going due to restructure anyway so I would have had to try to find a new role internally. So it was a godsend when the voluntary early exit scheme was announced and I didn’t think twice about applying. Best thing I ever did.

Wow, at 46 I feel like I'm just embarking on my second, post kids career. How many times have you changed career? Have you pushed yourself to move onwards? What are your plans career wise between now and when you do retire? Are there other areas you'd like to work in? More things you'd like to learn? You said you'd been working since you were 16, which implies you haven't got higher education (I know that you might have done this later) so why not pursue an educational interest while you are working? It would have the advantage of making life more fun and opening up new career doors. There's nothing wrong with retirement, but there's plenty of time to do that when you get old. And no, I'm not one of those idiots who'd keep working if I won the lottery - I'd travel the world and do things that didn't pay, but if you're stuck with working, at least make sure that bit of your life is as fulfilling as it can be.

55 here and I guess semi retired. I work 2 days a week max as supply TA.
I look after my toddler grandson anything between 2-4 days a week as my dd and her dh are nurses.
It's great. I keep a toe in the door at work, but the rest of the time I'm doing fun toddler stuff, going to groups wit him. I'm also learning italian and learning to play the piano. I walk the dog for hours.
Dh works long hours so I do all the home and admin stuff, but because I have time (most weeks) it's fine.
Unless something terrible happened I will never go back to work full time. I'm never bored.. and when I'm not needed so much as Granny care I shall either find a different p/t job or I will learn to draw, learn new skills!

We live a simple, cheap-to-run life and I don't envy anyone with well paid pressurised careers... I bloody love being semi retired granny care!

@HairyBanana There’s almost a decade between you and the Op.

I don’t know what stage of the menopause you’re at but I found a few years of going from light periods to massive flooding made my teaching career really stressful ( can’t just leave the class ). Brain fog and lack of sleep saps your confidence to learn new things or reskill.
I am in no way a wet lettuce but I was shocked at the difference between me at 48 running a teaching unit; looking good, dropping to a size 10 with abs for the first time and five years later - skin, hair and teeth shot to shit, bones aching.
Not saying everyone gets this but most of my friends have a definite shift in priorities.

I have an acquaintance you is in his 50s and he has never worked a day in his life. Rich parents, so hes rich by osmosis.
He is not bored!

I dream of winning the euromillions and be able to never work again! Im 40 and when I was a small child, if you asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I would say "retired". Because that meant having money, but not having to work. AS A CHILD!

I even like what I do, but I like not working (while having money) a lot more!

I know just how you feel OP. I am 11 months off retirement age and decided I had had enough - and I was only working part-time. Like you I started work at 16. My late parents left me some money, not enough to buy a house at my age, but I decided I might as well use the money to start enjoying life more. Over a month in, and no regrets Your time will come.

As someone who has never worked, it gets dreadfully dull sitting around all day

I know that was not directed at me but to give an example - we funded childcare for three kids over the space of 18 years, only for uni to kick in immediately after. Eldest finally self-sufficient but living at home and contributing a pittance to save for a house deposit.

2nd lived away for 4 years as an undergrad, including a year in London on unpaid internships. Now heading off to a European uni for further study which she has no funding for. Youngest in 2nd year uni - wants to spend placement year in NYC, possibly in uni, rather than paid work.

Holidays were often the only thing we really had to look forward to and I love that we took them as a family. No regrets. DH and I both public sector, 30/40 years of pensionable service.

I'm 60 and I really, really, really want to retire too. I've had it. I don't mind what I do, even enjoy it sometimes - it's the crappy, incompetent, micro-managing, promoted-way-beyond-their-ability culture that I can't handle any more. I'm sick of being scolded and corrected as if I'm a child. I don't know how many more years though I am going to have to support my kids! I didn't anticipate this.

I want to manage my own time the way I want to. If I want to sleep until lunchtime, I would like the freedom to do it. If I want to go out for lunch, I don't want to have to explain my plans. I want to be able to book holidays without having to seek permission in advance of booking, which makes it very inflexible, and all too often that permission is last minute. I want to be able to nip out to the garden centre, because I'm in the mood for it.

I really can't imagine how I'd have even been coping now, if I wasn't able to work from home. I'm sick of office politics, people stabbing each other in the back to climb the greasy pole. Underhand tactics whereby the chosen few/arselickers are treated more favourably than others whose faces don't fit because they dare to stand up for themselves.

I do however love 'nice' things, whether it be in my home, or clothes, shoes, jewellery, etc - but I don't 'need'. I've got enough though - I don't need 'stuff'. I am however working on upgrading my home prior to retirement, so that hopefully, other than repairs/replacing appliances etc, there won't be any major outlay on home improvements.

When I started my working life, I expected to have retired by now. I'd no idea then that the bloody government was going to pull that rug from under my feet and I feel resentful. I've worked since I was 15, firstly in a Saturday/holiday job while I studied, and then full-time. I've studied alongside working and alongside rearing children, and now I find myself being patronised by people who did none of that.

I.have.had.it.

Everyone is different - don't you realise that?

You may have been able to change career etc in your 40s - that all becomes way more difficult in your 50s, as I have experienced.

I've a wall's worth of degrees and diplomas. I'm educated to Masters level.

I covered the vast majority of a colleague's job when she was on long-term sick leave (one of a string of us who've suffered from work-related stress over the last few years, but nobody gives a shit). I worked my bloody arse off. I didn't get a single penny extra - others in the same situation got actings up.

Well the lady retired, and I applied for the job. Thought I was in pretty good shape for it. I'd done it, I'd made the connections, built relationships, had my MSc and professional qualification.

You can guess what happened... the young woman half my age, with a fraction of my qualifications and experience, in the organisation several grades more junior and been there a wet week - but malleable and anxious to please - got the job.

This was repeated on two more occasions before I decided to quietly quit.

I have a new line manager, who's been told that I have a wealth of experience and knowledge... go figure.

I’m 53 and know exactly what you mean op! I’m good at my job, but I just don’t have that edge or ambition any more. It’s a bit like treading water.

What has helped me is focussing more on my health, eating well and prioritising exercise. Lifting weights has really helped and also gives me something to work on and progress, apart from work.

I do think your body naturally encourages you to slow down around 50. Menopause is just part of nature and it hits some of us harder than others.

1. Could you work condensed hours?
2. Get a benefits check to ensure your son is getting everything he's entitled to.
3. You are already trying to reduce your housing costs.
4. Go through all your expenditure and see if there is anywhere you could save money. Shop at cheaper supermarket, give up takeaways and eating out, drive an older car, buy fewer new clothes, etc - could you save enough to work one day less a week and would that be a worthwhile trade?

Its not that people need a paid job per se. What we need is meaningful goal-orientated activity. (I'm a sociologist). For the vast majority of human history that was dedicated to survival and maintaining the communal bonds that made survival possible. It's not that people just wither and die when they retire - they wither and die when they lack purpose. What we can't do is 'do nothing' - we like the idea when we're tired and overworked (as I am now) but realistically we would get tired of it in short order. Its counter to our evolutionary psychology. It is for most mammals, that why they go crazy in zoos.

Personally OP, I love my work, but I still feel like I could do with a year off right now. A year without the pressure to publish or perish, the endless pointless administration, the relentless pursuit of funding that seems to be grant or denied by someone flipping a coin at random. But I don't want to 'not work anymore', not really.

(This is the real threat of AI, imo: human obselence. Not that it will kill us all, but that it will become better than us at everything so there's no longer any point in doing anything. Why learn a language when AI can flawlessly translate a book in an instant? Why learn an instrument when AI can compose a sonata? But that's another thread.)

I'm 55. I hear you.
I like my job
Like the people
But jeez another 12 years?

They really shouldn’t have raised the state pension age to 67 all in one go. I’m 62 and one of the many who have missed out on getting state pension at 60. I also worked from 16, had 2 DC and 4 months off work with both, only been out of work about 3 weeks in all that time. I was made redundant at 58 with one years money and haven’t worked since. At 60 I took 25% from 3 of 4 pensions that I have and get an annuity of £400 per month, which I know isn’t enough to live on, but I do have DH and 2 adult sons at home who still keep me busy.

If you can go from 5 working days to 4, you aren’t loosing too much as you pay less tax, pension and insurance.

My dad retired at 55 and he’s never been fitter, healthier or happier. He’s not aged decades; in fact, the opposite is true! He’s living his best life 😊

OP- if you can afford to go part time, I highly recommend it. Bit of the best of both worlds.

My dad retired early than he expected when he was made redundant. 25 yrs later despite horrible rheumatoid arthritis he is doing so well . He has an all consuming hobby which I do feel has been the absolute making of his retirement. I retired a couple of yrs ago and have honestly had 1 health thing after another this Yr. So not what I had planned nor expected

I’m so sorry I just read your op again and you can’t go part time. Sorry.

Plan exciting things to do after work and weekends, that's what gets me through. My Dad died at 60 and so never got to retirement, so I always live with the idea that life is for living now. I have booked a concert to go to every month, it keeps me going.**

If you have a a private pension, you can start to draw that from 57. That could get you a few years of leisure until the state pension kicks in.

I don't really understand @ettieb if you can't afford to go down to part time, then how can you afford to retire?

Also having a caravan holiday and not being able to afford to eat out does not really suggest someone who is able to give up a full time job for early retirement, sorry to be so blunt.

If you are really fed up at work, I would suggest exploring the idea of dropping a day at week to start with. My husband no longer works Fridays and he loves having a long weekend.

@Twiglets1

She can't afford to go part time or retire - that's the point of the thread.

That's lovely for your husband who has dropped his Friday

Im 61 work 3.5 days a week but really at the stage where i want to retire. I have worked since i was 16 so have worked for 44 years . Up until i was about 30 i was entitled to state pension when i was 60, then 65 and now 67. My financial advisor reackons i have enough private pension to go a couple of years early, and dh is hoping to go part time at some stage.

What is the point of a thread where you can't make any changes to the thing you're complaining about? I assumed @ettieb was looking for some suggestions and my suggestion is that she drops 1 day which can make a big difference. You don't even need to drop 20% of your pay to do so, can work slightly longer hours on the other 4 days and maybe drop 10% of pay.

As a PP metioned, you also pay less tax etc if you reduce your hours so the actual amount you take home is less reduced than you might think.