To ask why some people love correcting others at every available opportunity?

[ILackCreativity]

I’m on the verge of breaking up with DP this is driving me nuts.

Just came back from the cafe. This is a cafe that we often visit. They only serve 2 types of bagels. It’s been this way since it opened. My hands were full so used dictation to send him a message. He responded with a question mark. 5 seconds later I get another message asking “Did you mean “plain”?” Turns out Siri sent him “cheese or plane bagel?”

I bought 2 plain ones and he’s now miffed because it’s the wrong one.

This is how he is all the time. Constant corrections. I say the iPad is on the sofa. He walks over, finds it on the coffee table in front of the sofa, and comes back saying “did you mean the coffee table?”

Dictation or swipe to type doesn’t always get the apostrophes right. Instead of responding to the message he will correct my typos. Apparently things being wrong offends him and he can’t help himself as he would love it if people would correct him when he’s wrong. To him being accurate is more important than everything else.

I’m done. This isn’t a quirk I can live with anymore. What I’m curious about is why do people do this? Does it make them feel superior? Why?

I've met people like this and I didn't hang around to find out why they do it. It's very impolite.

So rude and especially so in that they know what you mean. Sofa or coffee table who cares?
He sounds bloody insufferable and I couldn't live with him either OP. Happier times ahead.

DP does it and I think it is his very literal mind (he is autistic). It used to wind me up so much but he assures me it is not passive-aggressive criticising me, he just really wants to know the right answer. I am therefore trying to be more patient… I mean, things like plane/plain are obvious typos to me but apparently not to him.

I have a friend like this and it's a mild form of autism/anxiety. If things aren't put right, he's thrown by it. It's the equivalent of most of us seeing a picture that been hung crookedly, and feeling compelled to straighten it.

I can put up with it as a friend, but I can imagine how irritating it would be to live with it 24/7.

Hes a tit

Send him a message, ‘Your chucked.’

See if he corrects it.

That’s the thing that bothers me the most. It’s one thing when he corrects key information. But in 99.9% of the cases his correction doesn’t even matter because whatever he says after the “did you mean” bit tends to be accurate!

I'm like that but I'm autistic. Not an excuse and I try to reign it but it is a reason.

Power trip

I know a couple of people like this.

Berks, the lot of them.

Like many rude people, reliant on the fact that people around them are far too polite to quietly correct their mistakes and therefore they never gain the self-awareness of what they're doing.

DD and DH do it due to neurodivergence. DD ASD and DH suspected ADHD. It drives me bananas but they genuinely cannot help it. Unless you are very specific they get stuck.

DD did it today when she and I were having a row, I called her out on playing the victim and she told me that actually she was in fact playing the martyr, so on occasions it can be funny, it totally defused the row, but other times it is infuriating.

I completely agree

It's fucking infuriating and totally unnecessary

I could cope with it with a friend I didn’t see much, not a partner that might go on to be more. Can you imagine that every day?

Bottom line, it’s because he wants to belittle you and make it clear he’s superior. I hate to say this but he does it because deep down, he doesn’t like you. If he did, he wouldn’t do it.

It is a dire need to be right, possibly brought on by very low self esteem...and rightly so, he sounds a right tit

I'm not sure I'd go with the assumption that this person has autism. People with autism normally like to follow rules. Often if you let them know something is rude once, they'll never do it again. It sounds like the partner here just wants to needle or belittle his girlfriend. Asking if she meant 'on the coffee table' instead of the sofa isn't a real question. He knows it was on the coffee table so the sole purpose of the comment is to point out she was wrong. Petty.

Hmmmmm

If it’s neurodiversity, then obviously more understandable. I would still argue he needs to be aware it’s his issue and to work on it if he can though - ND isn’t a blanket excuse for everything, or not to even work on things.

However it might not be due to ND at all - some people are just pricks!

In which case I would be out of this relationship.

Yes this too

My ex partner (female) was like this and it did my head in.
Even during her feeble attempts to fix our relationship she did it, knowing it irritated me - I think some people can't help it, but that doesn't make it less annoying!

Apparently things being wrong offends him and he can’t help himself as he would love it if people would correct him when he’s wrong.
DP, your habit of correcting my speech and text at any possible opportunity is wrong.
I appreciate that accuracy is important to you, but sometimes you need to make allowances.
I no longer wish to be in a relationship with you.
Bye-ee!

This would annoy me so much.

I've also experienced it being an issue with neurodiversity. That doesn't mean it's not hurtful or annoying but when I realised this it becamse easier to handle and maybe defuse with a joke than before, when I thought it was plain rudeness or a desire to belittle.

My relation has a people-intensive job that's very full on with social interactions all day. So when he came home his brain was a little fried and he couldn't manage his impulse to say something nor read between the lines/understand ambiguity.

😂😂😂

I'll be blunt. I wouldn't give a shit if it's due to neurodiversity. We would be incompatible and I would not be able to live with someone like this. It's fucking insufferable. Just because someone is ND, that doesn't mean you have to accept and tolerate their behaviours.

Its bullying. They think they can get away with it because they see it as socially acceptable - they aren't stealing your dinner money or calling you names.