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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To give up work..?

57 replies

custardtart21 · 10/09/2023 09:33

I work 2 days a week currently. I am what is classified as a qualified professional, I have to pay indemnity and a yearly registration fee - but it's such a low paid career. I'm fully qualified, done it since 2009... and I'm on £11.25 an hour.

My husband earns £60k with a big payout coming up and his earnings are highly likely to go up a lot over the next few years.

We have 2 DC, one school age and one younger, the youngest's nursery fees are £51 a day which we pay on the 2 days I work.

My options are carry on, work more days, get a more flexible job and work evenings or weekends.. or be a SAHM.

What would you do?

OP posts:
melmos · 10/09/2023 10:49

Absolutely do not give up work.

I honestly think it changes the dynamic of your relationship and it leads to break ups/cheating - normally with someone at work presumably as they more in common.

What about your husband working 4 days to help with childcare and the house? And you retrain as dentist?

TizerorFizz · 10/09/2023 15:14

Becoming a dentist might require certain A levels. Not all dental nurses have the required ones. It’s not a given a nurse will be accepted onto a dental degree course and it’s a full time long course.

BelindaBears · 10/09/2023 15:18

£730 a month is a lot to lose even if you offset the nursery fees against that.

Delatron · 10/09/2023 15:22

I’d look at it as a good opportunity to retrain in something that pays more. Think long term.

IhearyouClemFandango · 10/09/2023 15:24

Heyhoherewegoagain · 10/09/2023 09:56

So if all the “fun stuff” comes out of your salary, how do you propose to fund that from dh’s? £60k is a decent salary but it’s not massive

This. £60k isn't mega bucks, and you are in the fortunate position right now that all your money is solely yours.

£115 p/a is barely worth counting as an expense tbh, it is less than £10 per month.

jeaux90 · 10/09/2023 15:32

Stopping work leaves you financially vulnerable both short term and pension wise. I'd be considering a side step or retrain into something with better career progression.

I'm a lone parent BTW so motivation is about financial independence as a priority.

Lizzieregina · 10/09/2023 15:41

In your case I wouldn’t give up work as it seems like a nice balance. I would see what my other options might be for a side move or making more income.

I did give up my job to be a SAHM and I loved being with my kids, but it was lonely and isolating and when I was ready to return to work, it was difficult.

I never felt dependent on my DH as we always put all income into one pot, which continued after I left work so I was always in charge of finances and he was happy for me to take care of that. Also we funded a retirement account for me too, so I do have separate retirement money.

All of that rambling to say I’d keep the couple of days a week as it’ll be beneficial in many ways, both social and financial.

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