Unwarranted opinions from EVERYONE since finding out I'm pregnant

[CQ18]

Hi all,

Recently found out I'm pregnant, 7+5 today. Decided to tell close family as it's our first and we were excited. It's barely been a week since we shared the news and the opinions have been flying in hot and fast. It's driving me insane! About when/how I should tell work, how I should be feeling, what I should do about childcare (!). I'm honestly raging, I've since pushed back at my step mum (main culprit) saying leave me alone and let me work this out by myself. How do you handle this?! Am I being hormonally charged or within my rights?

Give them time to get over their initial excitement and calm down then if they keep doing it just smile and nod then change the subject. Keep doing this. Congratulations op.

Is it possible people are just trying to be helpful. Nothing in the above seems unkind, just probably overwhelming since it's your first. Congratulations by the way.

Are you sure it's not just conversations? Conversations and opinions a lot of the time is just conversation.

What’s the wider context? Do your family often over step boundaries or are they usually ok?

If they usually over step then personally I would go in hard with the boudaries early on to set the scene for them knowing you won’t accept that where the baby/child is concerned. Last thing you want is to set an expectation that they can comment on birth/parenting etc.

For me I would be giving a short direct repetition answer to their over steps- something like “I’ve got that sorted thanks” and if they continue “I’m not looking for opinions on that”.

obviously if they are usually respectful it may just be excitement that calms down.

I felt the exact same. People were just coming from a good place but I was so overwhelmed at the time I didn’t see it.

Beat advice would be to say ‘thank you, I’m just focusing on getting through this rough part just now then will focus on that part. So will give you a shout when my heads more in the game’.

Don’t be scared to just tell people to back off but realise they aren’t trying to undermine you, just support in their own way as right now it’s all they can do for you, support. Maybe ask them how they git through this first part and hint that some peace might be nice!

This.

You tell someone some news..... people carry on conversation about your news.

Otherwise you complain no-one is interested.

I had to push back on this a lot, and please do this if you want to - even be rude if you have to. Obviously wishing you all the best but being pregnant does not mean it will continue or you will have a baby. I shared early as was difficult to hide, then I was firm that I didn't want to discuss anything in the future.

This is your life now. You will be fielding opinions for decades. Buckle up!

When you’re pregnant, opinions are like arseholes - everybody’s got one.

I simply wouldn’t engage with the conversations or acknowledge they’ve even expressed an opinion, and rapidly change the subject.

I wish somebody had told me you needed to register for childcare if you want a decent nursery while you were pregnant! The ones around here are book up to 2025.

I had the same thing in the beginning of my pregnancy. I'm 35 weeks now & it's gotten better, best thing to do is nod and smile!
People make lots of annoying & unhelpful comments without realising.
I remember not long after telling work, some colleagues were having a graphic conversation in the afternoon about birth horror stories while I was sat at my desk trying not to cry. I'm much thicker skinned now & just ignore other people's comments as it's ultimately your baby & your decisions are the only ones that matter.
Doesn't help when you have raging hormones either! xx

Get used to it, it doesnt stop at pregnancy 😂 you will find strangers come up to butt in too!