AIBU to feel unappreciated as a volunteer

[VolunteerOrNot]

I volunteer at an organisation working with kids, which over the last 6 years has gradually increased from 4hrs to 16hrs pw over 3 days. I do enjoy helping out - but I am starting to feel exhausted as I already work full time and have teens. I have done and am also doing various qualifications which directly benefit the organisation. However, I feel as if there is barely any free time left for me. In the organisation, everyone else is paid, and I am refunded expenses and course fees.

However, I am starting to feel as I am taken advantage of and not valued as much as the other staff members. For example, I am often rota'ed to help ad-hoc for 6-8hr event days - but never asked. This is a large chunk of my weekend. Also, a lot of the staff are given more responsibility i.e. Group Leader - whereas I am always the Assistant - despite being more formally qualified than some of the Group Leaders I am assisting. I am treated as a float cover - which is good in some respects as I get to work with a lot of different staff and children, but the downside is that I don't ever get to know the children in the same way as the Group Leaders do - and I miss this part a lot.

I've got into a position now where I am demotivated as I feel undervalued and unappreciated. I find now, whereas before I would always reliably come in, I CBA anymore - which of course benefits neither the organisation or I, and solidifies my position as cover. I now dislike coming in and never knowing which group of children I will be working with. I also feel resentful that I am spending a huge part of my free time volunteering and studying for their various qualifications - but I am not treated in the same way as a paid staff member. I would stop, but I really do enjoy volunteering with the children.

Where do I go from here?

I think when voluntary work becomes a chore it’s time to change. I always felt less stressed and had more power as a volunteer in that I could walk away at any moment if I wanted to. I was once asked to work Mondays in my volunteer role with children but that was not convenient to me so I said No . You have more power than you seem to think OP. I guess it is good that they are supporting you by paying for courses ?

Lots of people saying switch organisations or resign .

you seem to have not conveyed your feelings on this .

firstly how many hours do you want to commit a week .. tell them .. tell them you are feeling more disconnected and want a permanent group it one of two groups .
tell them what you would want - ultimately it seems like you are in a paid role doing for nothing .. would you prefer a paid role ?

in all honesty a f/t job + volunteering and teens - you need some downtime

I think it's time to move on. The more you do, the more it seems to ne expected. We volunteer a lot as a family but with a couple of things I've stepped back as there was a push into more and it's too much. I saw an ad for something I've wanted to volunteer with for a while, and I knew it would be a nighttime role but they wanted volunteers to walk the streets from 8pm-4am once a month and imo, that's too much for a volunteer. Credit to those who do it though.

Good, reliable volunteers are worth their weight in gold to a charity organisation and yours seems to have lost sight of that by increasing taking advantage.

If they have any sense they’ll want to retain you as a volunteer, so speak with them and let them know the hours you are prepared to do. How that conversation goes will likely inform you of whether it’s time to move on or not.

😁 the loyalty of someone who turned up for years with no pay doing the work that is the whole reason for the organisation to exist

balanced against an employee who is in it for a paycheque and a career.

I hope this doesn’t sound too harsh but where are your boundaries? You have let them take more and more from you and it seems like you struggle to say no. I find people like that will always be taken advantage of. It’s 100% ok to say you only want to work x number of hours and if that doesn’t feel ok, think about whether you are a people pleaser and struggle saying no in other aspects of
your life. I used to be the same then read the book ‘the body says no’ by Gabor mate and it really changed my life for the better.

you’ve already got loads of great advice. I just wanted to say thank you. So many kids clubs rely on volunteers and they are so important. Our local scout group is desperately short of leaders and we can’t get volunteers for the school PTA. We need more people like you willing to help out. I hope you manage to sort it out and find a balance where you are not asked to do to much.

Why don't you apply for a paid position.

Don't just resign without talking to management about it in supervision. It's clearly something you've been very invested in and are probably very good at. I work in a similar role and it's so so important to be honest about these feelings and a decent manager will realise they've been leaning on you too heavily and make adjustments and ask you what changes you'd like to see. I'd go prepared with some ideas on that front to make it as productive as you can. You could also look at changes in your hours, you're maybe doing too much and need to scale it back just a little so it's a better fit with your main job.

Wow, they are taking the absolute piss out of you.
Tell them you want paid for your time like everyone else.
Sod that, volunteering should be on your terms & what suits you.

I'm sure they do appreciate you more than you realise, but it is not good that they aren't showing it. You know what you need to do. Book an appointment with a manager, go in with a bulletpointed list of what you want to say so you don't forget anything. Ask for everything you would like, even if you think it's a bit cheeky. They can explain if things aren't possible and you can decide if you're OK with that or not.

Then wait a couple of months and see how you feel then. Come and update us please - I'm crossing my fingers for a happy outcome.

I've worked in retail and some of the volunteers from the surrounding charity shops would come in to buy their lunch. Often they would have to buy their own lunch and pay for their bus fares. Yet they were always expected to put in lots of hours a week. Usually these people had learning or sensory issues who were unemployed and wanted to get experience for paid work 😓

I would try and initially have a chat with whoever is organising or managing the project, make it very clear what you are prepared to do and what support/training you would like. Is it a local organisation or a big, national one with policies, procedures etc?
I work for a charity and manage volunteers and our organisation is very clear on how we should treat and support volunteers (plus clear 'whistle blowing' procedures for any volunteers who feel unsupported).

16 hours a week? I can't see how that woudn't interfere with your family life or work.

I think anyone taking 16 hours a week for a hobby or to volunteer etc is excessive.

Agree with @Kindling1970

On top of a full- time job! That’s the same has working two extra days, so op us effectively working seven days a week.

when resentment starts to creep in, that’s the time to make changes or stop.

Sorry, misread your post. Just re- read it and realised you were saying 26 hours is skirt, not that it’s okay to do 16 hours. Didn’t see the double negative.

16 hours is a lot.

I've done fair bit of volunteering and the only people I've known who do more than one day or shift a week are retired people (and even then they mostly vol for two different organisations to spread themselves around and get more variety) or studenty types wanting the experience while they study/do bar work and are applying for paid roles within the sector(I volunteer for a large museum).

Everyone else does less, and the bar to keep your badge (which brings quite significant benefits) is set at more like one day a month AFAIR. My managers are always asking me if I am ok/have enjoyed my shift, and I would expect to have more say in choice of role/flexibility with timings and cancelling than if I were being paid (as I said below - my role is similar to some casual paid roles and I would apply for one of them if I could take that commitment).

Cheeky fuckers! Put some boundaries in place and remind the volunteer coordinator that you are precisely that, a volunteer there to help out from your own goodwill. If they don’t like it, walk. You owe them nothing. Quite the reverse.

Just say no.
Speak to them and say you started as 4hours volunteering which you were happy to do, but as you are now being asked to do more hours and even weekend events, you would like to be considered as a part of the team and paid.

As for your comment that others have more responsibility, if they're paid staff, they will get more responsibility and high roles, regardless of your qualifications being better suited.