birthday present

[notsurereally]

Name says it all. Not a big deal at all, just wondering what others think. At the outset I'll say I know it's presence not presents that matter, but was just a little surprised at this...

Had a party at home for dd (4) yesterday. Went well, dd v. happy etc.

Have opened presents with her; one mum X gave a small soft cover paperback story book with "a gift from in large print on the back, followed by "not for resale".

Thought it a tad cheeky to be quite so openly thrifty for a birthday present ! I use eg The Book People myself - in fact each child got a book among other things in their party bag, but I thought this was a bit much . They are not struggling for cash either..heard another mum say to X, "So your nanny does Sundays then ? Wow ! " (She has a younger child too) The reply was "No, but we have a weekend nanny too. You know how it is "

Message withdrawn

There's no law that says a gift has to cost money.

stop being so materialistic.

I would be delighted that my dd had been given a book, not yet another Bratz doll, tbh

I try my best to recycle duplicate birthday presents, but I've lost track of where dd's third Barbie + pooing dog came from, so I can't give it to another girl now, in case it was she who gave it to dd

Maybe they aren't struggling for cash but possibly they forgot to buy a present (it happens!), so gave something unused they found at home.

At least they brought a present and if it's something your dd likes then that's what counts.

Although I personally wouldnt give such a present I have reached the position now where I genuinely dont even get bothered by that sort of thing. You get all sorts of odd gifts at children's parties. And it really doesnt matter.

Also you never know but maybe the little girl in question specially chose this book to give her friend. Maybe she has another at home which is much loved.

YABU.

Actually I agree with op that I would be a bit not really bothered but suprised.

I don't think YABU to be shocked.

She didn't say she was bothered/not going to invite that kid next year or anything Although if it happened to my dd I might be tempted

I actually don't think this is that bad a crime. Like another poster said maybe it is a duplicate of a book her dd already has or was just something she wasn't interested in. Some mums have a stash of things that they keep for birthday gitfts and she maybe popped it int there.

TBH the only time I get bothered about the gifts dd receives is when MIL gives her something that she KNOWS we already have just because it was cheap rather than something she knows she wants or needs.

I would much prefer a lovely enjoyed gift that the giver go for free than a totally inappropriate thoughtless gift that cost £100.

P.s. I MYSELF want one of those Barbie pooing dolls they look like great fun lol. I would let dd play with it oc course (sometimes)

eddas you've got me about right ! I'm basically a little surprised the mum wrapped up the book knowing I'd know it had cost her nothing iyswim. All I'm talking about is the fact that in the reverse position, I'd be a little embarrassed at giving away an obvious freebie. But my dd will probably enjoy the book - yes way better than expensive crap - but my point wasn't about the money per se anyway !

oh and I'm not saying ANY of the following:

• she was mean
• I'm not inviting her dd again
• the book wasn't enough

...just raising the social point between me and the other mum.