Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be concerned about the violence at school

20 replies

Faytella2020 · 07/09/2023 20:38

Just started year 1. Generally happy in school. However there is violence in the school that worries me. Last year there were some incidences. Some didn't bother DC but others did. Not one particular child but the same names come up. One child has been moved from the school as his mum was worried about him being hurt.
I did speak to teacher last year and was Assured DC is safe and they're monitoring.
Yesterday DC informs me he was pushed into a wall and punched. I spoke to his new teacher who advised there is alot of additional needs and they're trying to get support but it takes time etc. I asked her what was the immediate strategy and she said more vigilance in the playground.

OP posts:
Notinvited85 · 07/09/2023 20:51

What you describe would worry me too. It sounds like a very tricky situation for everyone involved, probably not that quick to deal with. Have you tried speaking to parents at other schools locally? If those schools seem good and behaviour less extreme I think I’d consider a new school… specially if the pattern persists.

Original poster
Faytella2020 · 07/09/2023 20:54

Yes I spoke to 2 friends who said nothing like that goes in in their DC school. He's happy and has friends there though. Moving is a last resort and I'd imagine I need his dad's permission?

OP posts:
RandomButtons · 07/09/2023 20:56

Change school. Your child needs to be safe from being attacked like that.

CalistoNoSolo · 07/09/2023 20:59

I'd change schools without hesitation. It's appalling that he's being punched and pushed around like this, and particularly that this is an ongoing problem.

Original poster
Faytella2020 · 07/09/2023 21:01

I'm not happy. He's only been in year 1 for 2 days and it's starting again. The teacher told me to tell her everything things happen but am I wasting my time ? I'd be messaging her every day.

OP posts:
Original poster
Faytella2020 · 07/09/2023 21:01

Would I need his dad's permission to move him?

OP posts:
Notinvited85 · 07/09/2023 21:18

I’m not sure if you’d need his dad’s permission. Do you think he would disagree with a plan to move your son?

I would think that if your DS made friends quickly at one school chances are good that he’d make new friends fast at a new school too. I think that process is probably easier the younger the child? So in a way safer to cut your losses earlier.

CalistoNoSolo · 07/09/2023 21:19

Pretty sure you can do what you like if your son lives with you. Hopefully someone more knowledgeable will be along.

Original poster
Faytella2020 · 07/09/2023 21:19

His dad would disagree just to disagree. He's hard work. Lol.

OP posts:
CalistoNoSolo · 07/09/2023 21:20

Don't tell him until its a done deal?

Original poster
Faytella2020 · 07/09/2023 21:21

CalistoNoSolo · 07/09/2023 21:20

Don't tell him until its a done deal?

He'd make my life hell

OP posts:
Original poster
Faytella2020 · 07/09/2023 22:06

Or do I make a appointment with the Head? Would that change things .

OP posts:
Plonkandplonkers · 08/10/2023 19:46

Keep emailing the teacher every time something happens - it'll all be evidence that the children in question (and by extension the teacher) need more support. It doesn't matter if it's every day. You can be polite but firm.

Request a meeting with the Head. I'd go in hard, your child needs to be and feel safe at school. Of course the violent children are also entitled to an education, but that is a dilemma for the Head to solve. Your responsibility is to your child only.

AnotherTeaPlease · 08/10/2023 19:49

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

RodTheDodge · 08/10/2023 19:49

I changed dd’s school in year 1 for this reason but it was one child in particular being violent and the school being repeatedly useless. Best decision I made she settled quickly and thrives there just about to go up to high school so pleased I did it when I did

Lossoffaith · 08/10/2023 19:57

We changed schools in a similar situation. If the violence is not resolved asap it is worth it, to show DC they are protected. I

Blackbyrd · 08/10/2023 20:12

Schools don't do anything to resolve this issue which is sadly becoming prevalent. I removed my child, home educated them for a month or so then swopped to a different school. Reported the first school to Ofsted along with a couple of other parents, coincidentally or not they were inspected, found to be failing and put into special measures. Took the education authority to the LGO who found against them with a public verdict despite their many lies.So there are things you can do, and often done soonest before your child develops a school phobia or other issues

Abbimae · 08/10/2023 20:13

This is a huge issue in all schools. We are forced to take all sorts of needs and no support

FusionChefGeoff · 08/10/2023 20:45

We went through this with DS but he was a bit older. New child started in YR2 with significant but undiagnosed needs. Was always much much worse after holidays as routines etc had been forgotten.

We made a massive fuss which school we're grateful for as helped their case to get diagnosis and funding.

Email trail for everything.
Meeting with clas teacher
Meeting with Head

Volatile child was given 1 to 1 and restricted outdoor time away from other children. No unstructured time eg PE as that was also a trigger. It all petered out and now my boy knows he can rely on us to go into battle for him - but he also has incredible resilience having faced such a difficult situation and come out of the other side.

Original poster
Faytella2020 · 08/10/2023 21:54

Thanks. We've had no more issues thankfully. The boy in question now has a 121. In a class of 30 kids 3 of them have 121 so it's a high ratio.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page