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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Having a cleaner

9 replies

Sp33dyli0n · 07/09/2023 19:06

So please let me know what u guys think. So ive been a single mum to ds5 since he was 1. Struggled as most do to get by but a couple of months ago i was offered an amazing job opportunity where im now earning more than the average salary and have more money than ive ever known and feel so happy i can give my child all he needs and go on days out etc. However my issue is, now im workinh a full time intense job, finishing at 7pm mon-fri, doing the school runs, bath time cooking etc im struggling to maintain the house. I keep the house neat and tidy but find it hard to have time to do deep cleans. So now i have the extra cash i thought ill have a cleaner in once every week or two to do the deep cleans for me. My mum got made redundant during covid and has struggled to find a job since so suggested if she wanted to clean for me and ill pay her. My dad kicked off saying i need to stop being lazy and so it myself but mum was more than happy to accept. Im going to pay for a cleaner regardless. Am i being unreasonable for asking my mum to do it and giving her the money so she can enjoy a few treats or should i just hire a random cleaner and tell my dad im doing it all myself?

OP posts:
continentallentil · 07/09/2023 19:08

Hire your mum or a cleaner - whatever suits you best.

Tell your Dad it’s none of his business. Do not pretend you are cleaning if you aren’t - if he doesn’t understand why you are busy he needs to be re-educated or just stay out of it. Who made him God?

Flopsythebunny · 07/09/2023 19:10

Your dad needs to keep his mouth shut

Regholdsworthswaterbed · 07/09/2023 19:10

YANBU. I bet he's the type of man who has never lifted a hoover, am I right?

DarkForces · 07/09/2023 19:11

I went full time a few years ago and my 1 condition was using some of the additional money for a cleaner. It's been a fantastic investment. It's so nice getting home to a spotless house once a week

Sp33dyli0n · 07/09/2023 19:11

I would be more understanding if this is the case. But he does so much of the housework at his house. Him and my mum have always split chores 50/50 thats why im finding this very strange

OP posts:
FindingMeno · 07/09/2023 19:12

Get mum to do it and tell dad to mind his own.

ThePoshUns · 07/09/2023 19:18

Well done on the job!
I work FT and have a cleaner.
It's between you and your Mum, your Dad needs to shut up.
If your mum can't then pay someone else.
You definitely aren't lazy.

mondaytosunday · 07/09/2023 21:25

Yes well 50/50 that he does is not the 100% that you have to do!
Get a cleaner - I have one when I can afford it. I would feel weird employing my mum but that's up to you both.

NuffSaidSam · 07/09/2023 21:27

Sp33dyli0n · 07/09/2023 19:11

I would be more understanding if this is the case. But he does so much of the housework at his house. Him and my mum have always split chores 50/50 thats why im finding this very strange

Maybe he's upset he didn't get the job?

Ask him if he wants to job share with your mum.

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