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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Birthday party

28 replies

chazabella · 06/09/2023 14:12

Not really aibu but slightly is.

Ds started school yesterday in reception, he's having his birthday party on Sunday and we have 15 places still available (35 included I the cost already invited 20 who have confirmed they are coming). He has asked if he can invite some of the children ( about 4 of them) however I don't know what to do.

1 it's short notice and I don't want the other parent to feel put out

2 unfortunately we can not invite all of the class (30 of them) and I don't want anyone to feel left out

3 I want ds to invite who ever he likes it's his party.

We don't have a group message or anything really not sure what to do as really don't want a kid to feel left out especially so close to starting school. A lot of the mums already know each other through pre school attached to the school where as I don't due to do going to another setting.

If anyone can give me ideas on what to do please let me know if I'm going to invite I want to send the invites tomorrow.

OP posts:
Thatsshallot1967 · 07/09/2023 13:46

chazabella · 07/09/2023 13:40

I am also waiting to hand them out tomorrow once iv spoken to his teacher about putting them into the kids bag for them so the other ones don't see / get upset about it

You sound like a very kind and considerate Mum, op. Hope he has a great party!

Original poster
chazabella · 07/09/2023 14:00

Positive41 · 06/09/2023 23:05

It has most certainly happened.

The kid's will be talking about it - before and after possibly.

Yes, they are too young

But parents will remember. It will be logged.

How does the OP mark out 4 children that will not be invited. 'Sorry, numbers were limited-i will think about your kids next year'.

Off to a very rocky start.

You do not ever exclude 4 children from a whole class party- which is what this is.

Would you be ok with this-for your child? I doubt it.

Would you smile and wave at this mum? Doubt it

Her kid is so young to be making these judgements. They have a long road ahead. And parents do talk.

Show quote history

20 kids are from nursery and family (mainly nursery only 3 are family )which none of his nursery peers attend this school most who do attend school went to the pre school attached. The 4 children are from the school which he started this week, if it was in a few months it would of been the other way around whole class and very little family / outside of school friends etc.

If it was up to me I would invite school people yet but he has come home and asked for these particular children to come as he has enjoyed playing with them.

I have already explained to him to not really talk about the party as it may make some of the other children upset etc which he understood and asked me if he was allowed to invite these boys (tbh found out today 1 is a year 6 who is his school buddy)

OP posts:
Original poster
chazabella · 07/09/2023 14:01

Thatsshallot1967 · 07/09/2023 13:46

You sound like a very kind and considerate Mum, op. Hope he has a great party!

Show quote history

Thank you, I hoping he does he's had big changes over the last year and just want to see him happy.

OP posts:
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