to not know how a bra should fit?

[LolaLouise]

at 40 years old....?

In my day to day working life i wear a none wired bra as my job involves a lot of moving i find it more comfortable.

However, sometimes i want the lift and shape of wired.

Ive been measured, not recently mind, but the wired bras have always been uncomfortable. They dig into my upper arms when i move them. The wire isnt flush to my chest at the side which implies the cup size is incorrect right?

the cups themselves have a gap at the top between the bra and my breast

The middle section doesnt sit flush against my sternum, it gapes away and digs in at the sides

The back straps sits where it should, it doesnt ride up, and i can comfortable fit my fingers under the band

the shoulder straps sit in the right place

So logically, i thought the cups were too big, i went down one cup size and it was far too tight

so i went down one cupsize and up one band size. Even more uncomfortable

Ive measured myself using calculators and the original bra says the correct size. But it hurts, i gapes, it digs into my inner arms all day. This is with multiple diff styles, i have full cup tshirt, plunge, and balconette, none of them feel like they fit me

please tell me how a bra should fit and how to find my correct size.

Theres no where local to me that offers measuring, even the local M&S has shut down i recent years, so that isnt really an option as i dont drive to get to a major city.

This might help https://www.booborbust.com/

I should maybe also add, im a size 16 and quite short so im a fair bit over weight, not sure if that makes any difference to bra fitting mind!

I use the calculator on https://www.abrathatfits.org/calculator.php and it always does me right! The most important thing its taught me is that the measurement around your underbust, when the tape is held pretty snuggly, is your band measurement. New bras using the calculator ususally feel odd and a little too snug at first but you soon get used to it and the fit is a dream!

Weight should be supported by the strap round your back so that should be quite tight. Your boobs shouldn't bulge out anywhere. Bending over for a jiggle then standing back up can show up a bad fit. You shouldn't have red marks anywhere.

Most people wear backsize too big and cup size too small, cup size refers to difference between back and bust, not boob size per se.

Boobs come in all shapes and sizes and bras do too.

If you can manage a trip to your nearest bravissimo, they should sort you out!

I went and got fitted at an independent shop. It was a revelation. My band size went down and my cup size went up. My new bras fit very well, don't don't dig in and don't give me side boob. They also sit flat in the middle. They wee expensive but so worth it. My DD who is half my age and much smaller went to the shop too and said it was also a revelation.

If you get to a knowledgeable bra fitter, they know how the different brands are shaped and their sizing. Size alone doesn't guarantee a good fit every time, just as with clothes.

I wear an HH cup, if they can make something to fit me them there must be something for you too!

Basics to start at home:

• the band does 80% of the support not the straps, it’s ok to leave a small red mark (like a pair of socks does at the end of day)
• the band should only be able to pull out 2inches at the back not any more and sit flat round in line with the front (it shouldn’t be higher or lower on the back than the front part of the band)
• if the band sits higher on your back you need to go down a size (34 to 32)
• scoop breast tissue into the bra esp from the side
• , the cup should sit round the side and I’m a bigger cup, it’s pretty much in line with the middle of my arm pit.
• the wire should sit flat against your skin no gap at the front
• No gapping in the cup either

I would get measured but then also grab some bras in the next sizes up and down to check yourself

I would reccommend a trip to bravissimo. they are really great at fitting bras especially for curvy girls

I get dangerous web page from that link!

Another vote for Bravissimo. Two different bras of the same size can fit completely differently so it helps to try lots of different ones and go by what feels comfy. Never had anything but good advice from Bravissimo as they can just look at you in a bra and know what is right and wrong and suggest alternatives.

I don't get it either. If I wear allegedly the right band size (32... one place even insisted 30!) I can't bloody breathe. Like, to the point I feel like I've got breathing difficulty. I wear a 34, on the last hook.

Also, I'm far from overweight (size 8) but anything under a 36, I get "muffin top" over the band, especially under the arms, that looks shocking and is noticeable through clothes.

So I end up having to wear the straps too long, on a 34 so the band sits lower down to minimise the muffin top effect.

I have no idea how so many people who are, say a size 14 manage to wear a 34 or so without feeling absolutely suffocated.

As a start, it sounds like your straps are adjusted to be too tight.

What do you easily have access to? Even big supermarkets do bras. I’d measure myself and go and try on a good few. If you measure as 34c, say, I’d try

32c
32d
34b
34c
34d
36b

as a start.

Bearing in mind that styles can vary and even once you’ve worked out the right size you still might need to try on a couple more in that size.

I’m older than you and only recently discovered the bra size I’ve been wearing for 20 years DOESN’T FIT so YANBU. I thought I was 34A. Nope.

from your description, no your bras do not fit

get thee over to https://www.reddit.com/r/ABraThatFits/about/ for lots of fab advice . It’s the group behind the calculator recommended above. Even with your size calculated you’ll find some bras fit better than others. Even Bras in the same size from the same place can fit differently.

body size is a bad indicator of bra size. Just cos you’re a 14 doesn’t mean a 32 band isn’t right for you. It may mean you need a much bigger cup than you think.

You too @ChristmasCrumpet . I wonder if you can’t breathe because the cups are too small, so the overall circumference of the bra is much too small.

Another vote for Bravissimo. Entered the shop in despair. Staff were lovely, took time, we’re very helpful and all round has to have the best ever place I have been for a fitting. You can find information on how to get a bra that fits you well on their website.

I had myself fitted for a new bra a couple of weeks ago, I've gained a little weight recently and was aware that my bra size had changed. (Am also a size 16). The fitter brought me a variety of bras to try.

The first bra was a single layer mesh one which looked weird as it had sort of pleated cups, but I tried it on anyway. So the fitter told me to lean into the bra when putting it on - which I always do anyway - and then to pull all my breast tissue into it. Did that, weird pleats still there. She said I still had loads of breast tissue under my arms and to pull that in, so I sort of hoiked that bit of me into the cups. Then she said that the band wasn't exactly sitting flat to my body and to pull my breasts up into the cups. A miracle! There were no longer any pleats in the cups!

I didn't buy that bra but got a Fantasie one which I wore yesterday for the first time. So so comfortable!

So maybe make extra sure that all of your breast tissue is inside the cups, see if that makes any difference?

Thanks all. Some how in a recent house move i have lost my tape measure, so ive ordered another one to try the linked calculators. If not, ill have to plan a day trip and train ride to a city for a proper fitting

Ok so i ordered a tape measure..

Both calculators are putting me down a back size, which yeah i get

But the cup size, lord almighty, so the D cup i wear atm the minute gapes away from my breast at the top, and the wires stick out the side into my arm, they arent flush. But the calculators... one says HH the other says G.

How can that be correct.

Im even more confused. And i REALLY hate taking trains into big towns and cities

Here, this is helpful
https://www.instagram.com/tv/CMAfXEZjTS2/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

Briefly
Wire should encase all breast tissue (you might need to scoop it in and wiggle)
It should lie flat in the middle (gore)
The band should be firm and not ride up
There shouldn't be any spillage over the top of the cups

It might be the style is bad for the shape of your breasts rather than the size
There's lots about what style for what shape out there if you Google

https://brafittingsbycourt.com/blogs/blog/how-to-identify-your-breast-shape-to-find-the-perfect-fitting-bra

https://www.brastop.com/blogs/news/all-you-need-to-know-about-your-breast-shape?gclid=CjwKCAjw6eWnBhAKEiwADpnw9tG_l7vi9q3aeGbYdrGxvCuKZSxAUFgNFZiVENiHPPfxwe4MPqD6dRoCF1IQAvD_BwE

Honestly people will give you all sorts of conflicting advice and rules, the reality is the best fit is the one that is most comfortable for YOU!

There is no "should", it's like saying "how should jeans fit?" Some people love skinny jeans, some people love wider jeans, some people need to wear a belt, some squeeze and hoik themselves into their jeans.

I’m not sure there actually is any such thing as a bra size - I took my teenage dd shopping for one recently. We measured, took a selection of sizes into the fitting room. Found a really good fit in one style of bra but she didn’t like it so we headed back out and took the same size in a selection of others. The variation was ridiculous - like we could have gone down 3 cup sizes in one, and up 2 band sizes in another.

I think you just need to try on, adjust the straps and see if it’s a success and accept that some styles or brands just aren’t for you. It’s a lot like clothes really.

When you lift both arms in the air, a bra that fits shouldn't ride up.

Can't understand why there aren't more bra shops that do fits. Half the population needs a bra.

Have you tried a balcony bra? It sounds like you need a biggish cup size for the fullest bit of your boob but not the part higher up your chest, if that makes sense.

Try a different style and/or brand remeasure yourself as well

Just remember that a D cup is smaller on a 32 and bigger on a 38.

The same cup size ie ABCDEFG etc will change in size ie bigger or smaller depending on the band width